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burlesques-第37章

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young manat these letters; I sayone hundred and twenty…four

epistles from every part of India (not including one from the

Governor…General; and six from his brother; Colonel Wellesley;)

one hundred and twenty…four proposals for the hand of Miss Jowler!

Cornet Gahagan;〃 he continued; 〃I wish to think well of you: you

are the bravest; the most modest; and; perhaps; the handsomest man

in our corps; but you have not got a single rupee。  You ask me for

Julia; and you do not possess even an anna!〃(Here the old rogue

grinned; as if he had made a capital pun)。〃No; no;〃 said he;

waxing good…natured; 〃Gagy; my boy; it is nonsense!  Julia; love;

retire with your mamma; this silly young gentleman will remain and

smoke a pipe with me。〃



I took one; it was the bitterest chillum I ever smoked in my life。



        。        。        。        。        。        。



I am not going to give here an account of my military services;

they will appear in my great national autobiography; in forty

volumes; which I am now preparing for the press。  I was with my

regiment in all Wellesley's brilliant campaigns; then taking dawk;

I travelled across the country north…eastward; and had the honor of

fighting by the side of Lord Lake at Laswaree; Deeg; Furruckabad;

Futtyghur; and Bhurtpore: but I will not boast of my actionsthe

military man knows them; MY SOVEREIGN appreciates them。  If asked

who was the bravest man of the Indian army; there is not an officer

belonging to it who would not cry at once; GAHAGAN。  The fact is; I

was desperate: I cared not for life; deprived of Julia Jowler。



With Julia's stony looks ever before my eyes; her father's stern

refusal in my ears; I did not care; at the close of the campaign;

again to seek her company or to press my suit。  We were eighteen

months on service; marching and countermarching; and fighting

almost every other day: to the world I did not seem altered; but

the world only saw the face; and not the seared and blighted heart

within me。  My valor; always desperate; now reached to a pitch of

cruelty; I tortured my grooms and grass…cutters for the most

trifling offence or error;I never in action spared a man;I

sheared off three hundred and nine heads in the course of that

single campaign。



Some influence; equally melancholy; seemed to have fallen upon poor

old Jowler。  About six months after we had left Dum Dum; he

received a parcel of letters from Benares (whither his wife had

retired with her daughter); and so deeply did they seem to weigh

upon his spirits; that he ordered eleven men of his regiment to be

flogged within two days; but it was against the blacks that he

chiefly turned his wrath。  Our fellows; in the heat and hurry of

the campaign; were in the habit of dealing rather roughly with

their prisoners; to extract treasure from them: they used to pull

their nails out by the root; to boil them in kedgeree pots; to flog

them and dress their wounds with cayenne pepper; and so on。

Jowler; when he heard of these proceedings; which before had always

justly exasperated him (he was a humane and kind little man); used

now to smile fiercely and say; 〃D… the black scoundrels!  Serve

them right; serve them right!〃



One day; about a couple of miles in advance of the column; I had

been on a foraging…party with a few dragoons; and was returning

peaceably to camp; when of a sudden a troop of Mahrattas burst on

us from a neighboring mango…tope; in which they had been hidden: in

an instant three of my men's saddles were empty; and I was left

with but seven more to make head against at least thirty of these

vagabond black horsemen。  I never saw in my life a nobler figure

than the leader of the troopmounted on a splendid black Arab: he

was as tall; very nearly; as myself; he wore a steel cap and a

shirt of mail; and carried a beautiful French carbine; which had

already done execution upon two of my men。  I saw that our only

chance of safety lay in the destruction of this man。  I shouted to

him in a voice of thunder (in the Hindustanee tongue of course);

〃Stop; dog; if you dare; and encounter a man!〃



In reply his lance came whirling in the air over my head; and

mortally transfixed poor Foggarty of ours; who was behind me。

Grinding my teeth and swearing horribly; I drew that scimitar which

never yet failed its blow;* and rushed at the Indian。  He came down

at full gallop; his own sword making ten thousand gleaming circles

in the air; shrieking his cry of battle。





* In my affair with Macgillicuddy; I was fool enough to go out with

small…swordsmiserable weapons only fit for tailors。G。 O'G。 G。





The contest did not last an instant。  With my first blow I cut off

his sword…arm at the wrist; my second I levelled at his head。  I

said that he wore a steel cap; with a gilt iron spike of six

inches; and a hood of chain mail。  I rose in my stirrups and

delivered 〃ST。 GEORGE;〃 my sword caught the spike exactly on the

point; split it sheer in two; cut crashing through the steel cap

and hood; and was only stopped by a ruby which he wore in his back…

plate。  His head; cut clean in two between the eyebrows and

nostrils; even between the two front teeth; fell one side on each

shoulder; and he galloped on till his horse was stopped by my men;

who were not a little amused at the feat。



As I had expected; the remaining ruffians fled on seeing their

leader's fate。  I took home his helmet by way of curiosity; and we

made a single prisoner; who was instantly carried before old

Jowler。



We asked the prisoner the name of the leader of the troop; he said

it was Chowder Loll。



〃Chowder Loll!〃 shrieked Colonel Jowler。  〃O fate! thy hand is

here!〃  He rushed wildly into his tentthe next day applied for

leave of absence。  Gutch took the command of the regiment; and I

saw him no more for some time。



        。        。        。        。        。        。



As I had distinguished myself not a little during the war; General

Lake sent me up with despatches to Calcutta; where Lord Wellesley

received me with the greatest distinction。  Fancy my surprise; on

going to a ball at Government House; to meet my old friend Jowler;

my trembling; blushing; thrilling delight; when I saw Julia by his

side!



Jowler seemed to blush too when he beheld me。  I thought of my

former passages with his daughter。  〃Gagy my boy;〃 says he; shaking

hands; glad to see you。  Old friend; Juliacome to tiffin

Hodgson's palebrave fellow Gagy。〃  Julia did not speak; but she

turned ashy pale; and fixed upon me her awful eyes!  I fainted

almost; and uttered some incoherent words。  Julia took my hand;

gazed at me still; and said; 〃Come!〃  Need I say I went?



I will not go over the pale ale and currie…bhaut again; but this I

know; that in half an hour I was as much in love as I ever had

been: and that in three weeks Iyes; Iwas the accepted lover of

Julia!  I did not pause to ask where were the one hundred and

twenty…four offers? why I; refused before; should be accepted now?

I only felt that I loved her; and was happy!



        。        。        。        。        。        。



One night; one memorable night; I could not sleep; and; with a

lover's pardonable passion; wandered solitary through the city of

palaces until I came to the house which contained my Julia。  I

peeped into the compoundall was still; I looked into the veranda

all was dark; except a lightyes; one lightand it was in

Julia's chamber!  My heart throbbed almost to stilling。  I wouldI

WOULD advance; if but to gaze upon her for a moment; and to bless

her as she slept。  I DID look; I DID advance; and; O heaven! I saw

a lamp burning; Mrs。 Jow。 in a nightdress; with a very dark baby in

her arms; and Julia looking tenderly at an ayah; who was nursing

another。



〃Oh; mamma;〃 said Julia; 〃what would that fool Gahagan say if he

knew all?〃



〃HE DOES KNOW ALL!〃 shouted I; springing forward; and tearing down

the tatties from the window。  Mrs。 Jow。 ran shrieking out of the

room; Julia fainted; the cursed black children squalled; and their

dd nurse fell on her knees; gabbling some infernal jargon of

Hindustanee。  Old Jowler at this juncture entered with a candle and

a drawn sword。



〃Liar! scoundrel! deceiver!〃 shouted I。  〃Turn; ruffian; and defend

yourself!〃  But old Jowler; when he saw me; only whistled; looked

at his lifeless daughter; and slowly left the room。



Why continue the tale?  I need not now account for Jowler's gloom

on receiving his letters from Benaresfor his exclamation upon the

death of the Indian chieffor his desire to marry his daughter:

the woman I was wooing was no longer Miss Julia Jowler; she was

Mrs。 Chowder Loll!





CHAPTER II。



ALLYGHUR AND LASWAREE。





I sat down to write gravely and sadly; for (since the appearance of

some of my adventures in a monthly magazine) unprincipled men have

endeavored to rob me of the only good I pos
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