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fantastically in the distant mills。 Presently she turned。 Ditmar was in his
chair。 She crossed the room to the electric switch； turning on the flood of
light； picked up her tote…book and sat down again。
〃Don't you intend to answer your letters？〃 she asked。
He reached out gropingly toward the pile of his correspondence； seized the
topmost letter； and began to dictate； savagely。 She experienced a certain
exultation； a renewed and pleasurable sense of power as she took down his
words。
End of The Dwelling Place of Light； V1
by Winston Churchill
THE DWELLING…PLACE OF LIGHT
BY WINSTON CHURCHILL
VOLUME 2
CHAPTER IX
At certain moments during the days that followed the degree of tension
her relationship with Ditmar had achieved tested the limits of Janet's
ingenuity and powers of resistance。 Yet the sense of mastery at being
able to hold such a man in leash was by no means unpleasurable to a young
woman of her vitality and spirit。 There was always the excitement that
the leash might breakand then what？ Here was a situation； she knew
instinctively； that could not last； one fraught with all sorts of
possibilities； intoxicating or abhorrent to contemplate； and for that
very reason fascinating。 When she was away from Ditmar and tried to
think about it she fell into an abject perplexity； so full was it of
anomalies and contradictions； of conflicting impulses； so far beyond her
knowledge and experience。 For Janet had been born in an age which is
rapidly discarding blanket morality and taboos； which has as yet to
achieve the morality of scientific knowledge； of the individual instance。
Tradition； convention； the awful examples portrayed for gain in the
movies； even her mother's pessimistic attitude in regard to the freedom
with which the sexes mingle to…day were powerless to influence her。 The
thought； however； that she might fundamentally resemble her sister Lise；
despite a fancied superiority； did occasionally shake her and bring about
a revulsion against Ditmar。 Janet's problem was in truth； though she
failed so to specialize it； the supreme problem of our time： what is the
path to self…realization？ how achieve emancipation from the commonplace？
Was she in love with Ditmar？ The question was distasteful； she avoided
it； for enough of the tatters of orthodox Christianity clung to her to
cause her to feel shame when she contemplated the feelings he aroused in
her。 It was when she asked herself what his intentions were that her
resentment burned； pride and a sense of her own value convinced her that
he had deeply insulted her in not offering marriage。 Plainly； he did not
intend to offer marriage； on the other hand； if he had done so； a
profound； self…respecting and moral instinct in her would； in her present
mood； have led her to refuse。 She felt a fine scorn for the woman who；
under the circumstances； would insist upon a bond and all a man's worldly
goods in return for that which it was her privilege to give freely； while
the notion of servility； of economic dependencethough she did not so
phrase itrepelled her far more than the possibility of social ruin。
This she did not contemplate at all； her impulse to leave Hampton and
Ditmar had nothing to do with that。。。。
Away from Ditmar； this war of inclinations possessed her waking mind；
invaded her dreams。 When she likened herself to the other exploited
beings he drove to run his mills and fill his orders；of whom Mr。
Siddons had spokenher resolution to leave Hampton gained such definite
ascendancy that her departure seemed only a matter of hours。
In this perspective Ditmar appeared so ruthless； his purpose to use her
and fling her away so palpable； that she despised herself for having
hesitated。 A longing for retaliation consumed her； she wished to hurt
him before she left。 At such times； however； unforeseen events
invariably intruded to complicate her feelings and alter her plans。 One
evening at supper； for instance； when she seemed at last to have achieved
the comparative peace of mind that follows a decision after struggle； she
gradually became aware of an outburst from Hannah concerning the stove；
the condition of which for many months had been a menace to the welfare
of the family。 Edward； it appeared； had remarked mildly on the absence
of beans。
〃Beans！〃 Hannah cried。 〃You're lucky to have any supper at all。 I just
wish I could get you to take a look at that oventhere's a hole you can
put your hand through； if you've a mind to。 I've done my best； I've made
out to patch it from time to time； and to…day I had Mr。 Tiernan in。 He
says it's a miracle I've been able to bake anything。 A new one'll cost
thirty dollars； and I don't know where the money's coming from to buy it。
And the fire…box is most worn through。〃
〃Well； mother； we'll see what we can do；〃 said Edward。
〃You're always seeing what you can do； but I notice you never do
anything；〃 retorted Hannah； and Edward had the wisdom not to reply。
Beside his place lay a lengthy； close…written letter； and from time to
time； as he ate his canned pears； his hand turned over one of its many
sheets。
〃It's from Eben Wheeler； says he's been considerably troubled with
asthma；〃 he observed presently。 〃His mother was a Bumpus； a daughter of
Caleb…descended from Robert； who went from Dolton to Tewksbury in 1816；
and fought in the war of 1812。 I've told you about him。 This Caleb was
born in '53； and he's living now with his daughter's family in
Detroit。。。。 Son…in…law's named Nott； doing well with a construction
company。 Now I never could find out before what became of Robert's
descendants。 He married Sarah Styles〃 （reading painfully） 〃‘and they had
issue； John； Robert； Anne； Susan； Eliphalet。 John went to Middlebury；
Vermont； and married '〃
Hannah； gathering up the plates； clattered them together noisily。
〃A lot of good it does us to have all that information about Eben
Wheeler's asthma！〃 she complained。 〃It'll buy us a new stove； I guess。
Him and his old Bumpus papers！ If the house burned down over our heads
that's all he'd think of。〃
As she passed to and fro from the dining…room to the kitchen Hannah's
lamentations continued； grew more and more querulous。 Accustomed as
Janet was to these frequent arraignments of her father's inefficiency； it
was gradually borne in upon her nowdespite a preoccupation with her own
fatethat the affair thus plaintively voiced by her mother was in effect
a family crisis of the first magnitude。 She was stirred anew to anger
and revolt against a life so precarious and sordid as to be threatened in
its continuity by the absurd failure of a stove； when； glancing at her
sister； she felt a sharp pang of self…conviction； of self…disgust。 Was
she； also； like that； indifferent and self…absorbed？ Lise； in her
evening finery； looking occasionally at the clock； was awaiting the hour
set for a rendezvous； whiling away the time with the Boston evening sheet
whose glaring red headlines stretched across the page。 When the
newspaper fell to her lap a dreamy expression clouded Lise's eyes。 She
was thinking of some man！ Quickly Janet looked away； at her father； only
to be repelled anew by the expression； almost of fatuity； she discovered
on his face as he bent over the letter once more。 Suddenly she
experienced an overwhelming realization of the desperation of Hannah's
plight；the destiny of spending one's days； without sympathy； toiling in
the confinement of these rooms to supply their bodily needs。 Never had a
destiny seemed so appalling。 And yet Janet resented that pity。 The
effect of it was to fetter and inhibit； from the moment of its intrusion
she was no longer a free agent； to leave Hampton and Ditmar when she
chose。 Without her； this family was helpless。 She rose； and picked up
some of the dishes。 Hannah snatched them from her hands。
〃Leave 'em alone； Janet！〃 she said with unaccustomed sharpness。 〃I guess
I ain't too feeble to handle 'em yet。〃
And a flash of new understanding came to Janet。 The dishes were
vicarious； a substitute for that greater destiny out of which Hannah had
been cheated by fate。 A substitute； yes； and perhaps become something of
a mania； like her father's Bumpus papers。。。。 Janet left the room
swiftly； entered the bedroom； put on her coat and hat； and went out。
Across the street the light in Mr。 Tiernan's shop was still burning； and
through the window she perceived Mr。 Tiernan himself tilted back in his
chair； his feet on the table； the tip of his nose pointed straight at the
ceiling。 When the bell betrayed the opening of the door he let down his
chair on the floor with a bang。
〃Why； it's Miss Janet！〃 he exclaimed。 〃How are you this evening； now？ I
was just hoping some one would pay me a call。〃
Twinkling at her； he managed； somewhat magically； to dispel her temper of
pessimism； and she was moved to reply：
〃You know you were having a beautiful time； all by yourself。〃
〃A beautiful time； is it？ Maybe it's because I was dreaming of some
young lady a…coming to pay me a visit。〃
〃Well； dreams never come up to expectations； do they？〃
〃Then it's dreaming I am； still；〃 retor