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commercial intercourse。 Presently he stopped and began fumbling in one
of the drawers of his desk。
〃Where is the memorandum I made last week for Percy and Company？〃
〃Isn't it there？〃 she asked。
But he continued to fumble； running through the papers and disarranging
them until she could stand it no longer。
〃You never know where to find anything；〃 she declared； rising and darting
around the desk and bending over the drawer； her deft fingers rapidly
separating the papers。 She drew forth the memorandum triumphantly。
〃There！〃 she exclaimed。 〃It was right before your eyes。〃
As she thrust it at him his hand closed over hers。 She felt him drawing
her； irresistibly。
〃Janet！〃 he said。 〃For God's sakeyou're killing medon't you know it？
I can't stand it any longer！〃
〃Don't！〃 she whispered； terror…stricken； straining away from him。 〃Mr。
Ditmarlet me go！〃
A silent struggle ensued； she resisting him with all the aroused strength
and fierceness of her nature。 He kissed her hair； her neck；she had
never imagined such a force as this； she felt herself weakening；
welcoming the annihilation of his embrace。
〃Mr。 Ditmar！〃 she cried。 〃Somebody will come in。〃
Her fingers sank into his neck； she tried to hurt him and by a final
effort flung herself free and fled to the other side of the room。
〃You littlewildcat！〃 she heard him exclaim； saw him put his
handkerchief to his neck where her fingers had been； saw a red stain on
it。 〃I'll have you yet！〃
But even then； as she stood leaning against the wall； motionless save for
the surging of her breast； there was about her the same strange； feral
inscrutableness。 He was baffled； he could not tell what she was
thinking。 She seemed； unconquered； to triumph over her disarray and the
agitation of her body。 Then； with an involuntary gesture she raised her
hands to her hair； smoothing it； and without seeming haste left the room；
not so much as glancing at him； closing the door behind her。
She reached her table in the outer office and sat down； gazing out of the
window。 The face of the worldthe river； the mills； and the bridgewas
changed； tinged with a new and unreal quality。 She； too； must be
changed。 She wasn't； couldn't be the same person who had entered that
room of Ditmar's earlier in the afternoon！ Mr。 Caldwell made a
commonplace remark； she heard herself answer him。 Her mind was numb；
only her body seemed swept by fire； by emotionsemotions of fear； of
anger； of desire so intense as to make her helpless。 And when at length
she reached out for a sheet of carbon paper her hand trembled so she
could scarcely hold it。 Only by degrees was she able to get sufficient
control of herself to begin her copying； when she found a certain relief
in actionher hands flying over the keys； tearing off the finished
sheets； and replacing them with others。 She did not want to think； to
decide； and yet she knewsomething was trying to tell her that the
moment for decision had come。 She must leave； now。 If she stayed on；
this tremendous adventure she longed for and dreaded was inevitable。
Fear and fascination battled within her。 To run away was to deny life；
to remain； to taste and savour it。 She had tasted itwas it sweet？
that sense of being swept away； engulfed by an elemental power beyond
them both； yet in them both？ She felt him drawing her to him； and she
struggling yet inwardly longing to yield。 And the scarlet stain on his
handkerchiefwhen she thought of that her blood throbbed； her face
burned。
At last the door of the inner office opened； and Ditmar came out and
stood by the rail。 His voice was queer； scarcely recognizable。
〃Miss Bumpuswould you mind coming into my room a moment； before you
leave？〃 he said。
She rose instantly and followed him； closing the door behind her； but
standing at bay against it； her hand on the knob。
〃I'm not going to touch youyou needn't be afraid；〃 he said。 Reassured
by the unsteadiness of his voice she raised her eyes to perceive that his
face was ashy； his manner nervous； apprehensive； conciliatory；a Ditmar
she had difficulty in recognizing。 〃I didn't mean to frighten； to offend
you；〃 he went on。 〃Something got hold of me。 I was crazy； I couldn't
help itI won't do it again； if you'll stay。 I give you my word。〃
She did not reply。 After a pause he began again； repeating himself。
〃I didn't mean to do it。 I was carried awayit all happened before I
knew。 II wouldn't frighten you that way for anything in the world。〃
Still she was silent。
〃For God's sake； speak to me！〃 he cried。 〃Say you forgive megive me
another chance！〃
But she continued to gaze at him with widened； enigmatic eyeswhether of
reproach or contempt or anger he could not say。 The situation
transcended his experience。 He took an uncertain step toward her； as
though half expecting her to flee； and stopped。
〃Listen！〃 he pleaded。 〃I can't talk to you here。 Won't you give me a
chance to explainto put myself right？ You know what I think of you；
how I respect andadmire you。 If you'll only let me see you somewhere
anywhere； outside of the office； for a little while； I can't tell you how
much I'd appreciate it。 I'm sure you don't understand how I feelI
couldn't bear to lose you。 I'll be down by the canalnear the bridge
at eight o'clock to…night。 I'll wait for you。 You'll come？ Say you'll
come； and give me another chance！〃
〃Aren't you going to finish your letters？〃 she asked。
He stared at her in sheer perplexity。 〃Letters！〃 he exclaimed。 〃Damn
the letters！ Do you think I could write any letters now？〃
As a faint ray in dark waters； a gleam seemed to dance in the shadows of
her eyes； yet was gone so swiftly that he could not be sure of having
seen it。 Had she smiled？
〃I'll be there；〃 he cried。 〃I'll wait for you 〃
She turned from him； opened the door； and went out。
That evening； as Janet was wiping the dishes handed her by her mother；
she was repeating to herself 〃Shall I goor shan't I？〃just as if the
matter were in doubt。 But in her heart she was convinced of its
predetermination by some power other than her own volition。 With this
feeling； that she really had no choice； that she was being guided and
impelled； she went to her bedroom after finishing her task。 The hands of
the old dining…room clock pointed to quarter of eight； and Lise had
already made her toilet and departed。 Janet opened the wardrobe； looked
at the new blue suit hanging so neatly on its wire holder； hesitated； and
closed the door again。 Here； at any rate； seemed a choice。 She would
not wear that； to…night。 She tidied her hair； put on her hat and coat；
and went out； but once in the street she did not hurry； though she knew
the calmness she apparently experienced to be false： the calmness of
fatality； because she was obeying a complicated impulse stronger than
herselfan impulse that at times seemed mere curiosity。 Somewhere；
removed from her immediate consciousness； a storm was raging； she was
aware of a disturbance that reached her faintly； like the distant
throbbing of the looms she heard when she turned from Faber into West
Street She had not been able to eat any supper。 That throbbing of the
looms in the night！ As it grew louder and louder the tension within her
increased； broke its bounds； set her heart to throbbing toothrobbing
wildly。 She halted； and went on again； precipitately； but once more
slowed her steps as she came to West Street and the glare of light at the
end of the bridge； at a little distance； under the chequered shadows of
the bare branches； she saw something movea man； Ditmar。 She stood
motionless as he hurried toward her。
〃You've come！ You've forgiven me？〃 he asked。
〃Why were youdown there？〃 she asked。
〃Why？ Because I thoughtI thought you wouldn't want anybody to know〃
It was quite natural that he should not wish to be seen； although she had
no feeling of guilt； she herself did not wish their meeting known。 She
resented the subterfuge in him； but she made no comment because his
perplexity； his embarrassment were gratifying to her resentment； were
restoring her self…possession； giving her a sense of power。
〃We can't stay here；〃 he went on； after a moment。 〃Let's take a little
walkI've got a lot to say to you。 I want to put myself right。〃 He
tried to take her arm； but she avoided him。 They started along the canal
in the direction of the Stanley Street bridge。 〃Don't you care for me a
little？〃 he demanded。
〃Why should I？〃 she parried。
〃Thenwhy did you come？〃
〃To hear what you had to say。〃
〃You meanabout this afternoon？〃
〃Partly；〃 said Janet。
〃Wellwe'll talk it all over。 I wanted to explain about this afternoon；
especially。 I'm sorry〃
〃Sorry！〃 she exclaimed。
The vehemence of her rebukefor he recognized it as suchtook him
completely aback。 Thus she was wont； at the most unexpected moments； to
betray the passion within her； the passion that made him sick with
desire。 How was he to conquer a woman of this type； who never took
refuge in the conventional tactics of her sex； as he had known them？
〃I didn't mean that；〃 he explained desperately。 〃My Godto feel you； to
have you in