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doctor… a general executioner。 And now give me something to eat； or
else take your government； for a trade that does not feed its master
is not worth two beans。〃
The doctor was dismayed when he saw the governor in such a
passion； and he would have made a Tirteafuera out of the room but that
the same instant a post…horn sounded in the street； and the carver
putting his head out of the window turned round and said； 〃It's a
courier from my lord the duke； no doubt with some despatch of
importance。〃
The courier came in all sweating and flurried； and taking a paper
from his bosom； placed it in the governor's hands。 Sancho handed it to
the majordomo and bade him read the superscription； which ran thus： To
Don Sancho Panza； Governor of the Island of Barataria； into his own
hands or those of his secretary。 Sancho when he heard this said；
〃Which of you is my secretary？〃 〃I am； senor；〃 said one of those
present； 〃for I can read and write； and am a Biscayan。〃 〃With that
addition；〃 said Sancho； 〃you might be secretary to the emperor
himself； open this paper and see what it says。〃 The new…born secretary
obeyed； and having read the contents said the matter was one to be
discussed in private。 Sancho ordered the chamber to be cleared； the
majordomo and the carver only remaining； so the doctor and the
others withdrew； and then the secretary read the letter； which was
as follows：
It has come to my knowledge； Senor Don Sancho Panza； that certain
enemies of mine and of the island are about to make a furious attack
upon it some night； I know not when。 It behoves you to be on the alert
and keep watch； that they surprise you not。 I also know by trustworthy
spies that four persons have entered the town in disguise in order
to take your life； because they stand in dread of your great capacity；
keep your eyes open and take heed who approaches you to address you；
and eat nothing that is presented to you。 I will take care to send you
aid if you find yourself in difficulty； but in all things you will act
as may be expected of your judgment。 From this place； the Sixteenth of
August； at four in the morning。
Your friend；
THE DUKE
Sancho was astonished； and those who stood by made believe to be
so too； and turning to the majordomo he said to him； 〃What we have got
to do first； and it must be done at once； is to put Doctor Recio in
the lock…up； for if anyone wants to kill me it is he； and by a slow
death and the worst of all； which is hunger。〃
〃Likewise；〃 said the carver； 〃it is my opinion your worship should
not eat anything that is on this table； for the whole was a present
from some nuns； and as they say； 'behind the cross there's the
devil。'〃
〃I don't deny it；〃 said Sancho； 〃so for the present give me a
piece of bread and four pounds or so of grapes； no poison can come
in them； for the fact is I can't go on without eating； and if we are
to be prepared for these battles that are threatening us we must be
well provisioned； for it is the tripes that carry the heart and not
the heart the tripes。 And you； secretary； answer my lord the duke
and tell him that all his commands shall be obeyed to the letter； as
he directs； and say from me to my lady the duchess that I kiss her
hands； and that I beg of her not to forget to send my letter and
bundle to my wife Teresa Panza by a messenger； and I will take it as a
great favour and will not fail to serve her in all that may lie within
my power； and as you are about it you may enclose a kiss of the hand
to my master Don Quixote that he may see I am grateful bread； and as a
good secretary and a good Biscayan you may add whatever you like and
whatever will come in best； and now take away this cloth and give me
something to eat； and I'll be ready to meet all the spies and
assassins and enchanters that may come against me or my island。〃
At this instant a page entered saying； 〃Here is a farmer on
business； who wants to speak to your lordship on a matter of great
importance； he says。〃
〃It's very odd；〃 said Sancho； 〃the ways of these men on business； is
it possible they can be such fools as not to see that an hour like
this is no hour for coming on business？ We who govern and we who are
judges… are we not men of flesh and blood； and are we not to be
allowed the time required for taking rest； unless they'd have us
made of marble？ By God and on my conscience； if the government remains
in my hands （which I have a notion it won't）； I'll bring more than one
man on business to order。 However； tell this good man to come in；
but take care first of all that he is not some spy or one of my
assassins。〃
〃No； my lord；〃 said the page； 〃for he looks like a simple fellow；
and either I know very little or he is as good as good bread。〃
〃There is nothing to be afraid of；〃 said the majordomo； 〃for we
are all here。〃
〃Would it be possible； carver；〃 said Sancho； 〃now that Doctor
Pedro Recio is not here； to let me eat something solid and
substantial； if it were even a piece of bread and an onion？〃
〃To…night at supper；〃 said the carver； 〃the shortcomings of the
dinner shall be made good； and your lordship shall be fully
contented。〃
〃God grant it；〃 said Sancho。
The farmer now came in； a well…favoured man that one might see a
thousand leagues off was an honest fellow and a good soul。 The first
thing he said was； 〃Which is the lord governor here？〃
〃Which should it be；〃 said the secretary； 〃but he who is seated in
the chair？〃
〃Then I humble myself before him；〃 said the farmer； and going on his
knees he asked for his hand； to kiss it。 Sancho refused it； and bade
him stand up and say what he wanted。 The farmer obeyed； and then said；
〃I am a farmer； senor； a native of Miguelturra； a village two
leagues from Ciudad Real。〃
〃Another Tirteafuera！〃 said Sancho； 〃say on； brother； I know
Miguelturra very well I can tell you； for it's not very far from my
own town。〃
〃The case is this； senor；〃 continued the farmer； 〃that by God's
mercy I am married with the leave and licence of the holy Roman
Catholic Church； I have two sons； students； and the younger is
studying to become bachelor； and the elder to be licentiate； I am a
widower； for my wife died； or more properly speaking； a bad doctor
killed her on my hands； giving her a purge when she was with child；
and if it had pleased God that the child had been born； and was a boy；
I would have put him to study for doctor； that he might not envy his
brothers the bachelor and the licentiate。〃
〃So that if your wife had not died； or had not been killed； you
would not now be a widower；〃 said Sancho。
〃No； senor； certainly not；〃 said the farmer。
〃We've got that much settled；〃 said Sancho； 〃get on； brother； for
it's more bed…time than business…time。〃
〃Well then；〃 said the farmer； 〃this son of mine who is going to be a
bachelor； fell in love in the said town with a damsel called Clara
Perlerina； daughter of Andres Perlerino； a very rich farmer； and
this name of Perlerines does not come to them by ancestry or
descent； but because all the family are paralytics； and for a better
name they call them Perlerines； though to tell the truth the damsel is
as fair as an Oriental pearl； and like a flower of the field； if you
look at her on the right side； on the left not so much； for on that
side she wants an eye that she lost by small…pox； and though her
face is thickly and deeply pitted； those who love her say they are not
pits that are there； but the graves where the hearts of her lovers are
buried。 She is so cleanly that not to soil her face she carries her
nose turned up； as they say； so that one would fancy it was running
away from her mouth； and with all this she looks extremely well； for
she has a wide mouth； and but for wanting ten or a dozen teeth and
grinders she might compare and compete with the comeliest。 Of her lips
I say nothing； for they are so fine and thin that； if lips might be
reeled； one might make a skein of them； but being of a different
colour from ordinary lips they are wonderful； for they are mottled；
blue； green； and purple… let my lord the governor pardon me for
painting so minutely the charms of her who some time or other will
be my daughter； for I love her； and I don't find her amiss。〃
〃Paint what you will；〃 said Sancho； 〃I enjoy your painting； and if I
had dined there could be no dessert more to my taste than your
portrait。〃
〃That I have still to furnish；〃 said the farmer； 〃but a time will
come when we may be able if we are not now； and I can tell you； senor；
if I could paint her gracefulness and her tall figure； it would
astonish you； but that is impossible because she is bent double with
her knees up to her mouth； but for all that it is easy to see that
if she could stand up she'd knock her head against the ceiling； and
she would have given her hand to my bachelor ere this； only that she
can't stretch it out； for it's contracted； but still one can see its
elegance and fine make by its long furrowed nails。〃
〃That will do； brother；〃 said Sancho； 〃consider you have painted her
from head to foot； what is it you want now？ Come to the point
without all this beating