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cannot be done without them； you might be content …as the whole
thing is feigned； and counterfeit； and in joke… you might be
content； I say； with giving them to yourself in the water； or
against something soft； like cotton； and leave it all to me； for
I'll tell my lady that your worship knocked your head against a
point of rock harder than a diamond。〃
〃I thank thee for thy good intentions； friend Sancho；〃 answered
Don Quixote； 〃but I would have thee know that all these things I am
doing are not in joke； but very much in earnest； for anything else
would be a transgression of the ordinances of chivalry； which forbid
us to tell any lie whatever under the penalties due to apostasy； and
to do one thing instead of another is just the same as lying； so my
knocks on the head must be real； solid； and valid； without anything
sophisticated or fanciful about them； and it will be needful to
leave me some lint to dress my wounds； since fortune has compelled
us to do without the balsam we lost。〃
〃It was worse losing the ass；〃 replied Sancho； 〃for with him lint
and all were lost； but I beg of your worship not to remind me again of
that accursed liquor； for my soul； not to say my stomach； turns at
hearing the very name of it； and I beg of you； too； to reckon as
past the three days you allowed me for seeing the mad things you do；
for I take them as seen already and pronounced upon； and I will tell
wonderful stories to my lady； so write the letter and send me off at
once； for I long to return and take your worship out of this purgatory
where I am leaving you。〃
〃Purgatory dost thou call it； Sancho？〃 said Don Quixote； 〃rather
call it hell； or even worse if there be anything worse。〃
〃For one who is in hell；〃 said Sancho； 〃nulla est retentio； as I
have heard say。〃
〃I do not understand what retentio means；〃 said Don Quixote。
〃Retentio；〃 answered Sancho； 〃means that whoever is in hell never
comes nor can come out of it； which will be the opposite case with
your worship or my legs will be idle； that is if I have spurs to
enliven Rocinante： let me once get to El Toboso and into the
presence of my lady Dulcinea； and I will tell her such things of the
follies and madnesses （for it is all one） that your worship has done
and is still doing； that I will manage to make her softer than a glove
though I find her harder than a cork tree； and with her sweet and
honeyed answer I will come back through the air like a witch； and take
your worship out of this purgatory that seems to be hell but is not；
as there is hope of getting out of it； which； as I have said； those in
hell have not； and I believe your worship will not say anything to the
contrary。〃
〃That is true；〃 said he of the Rueful Countenance； 〃but how shall we
manage to write the letter？〃
〃And the ass…colt order too；〃 added Sancho。
〃All shall be included；〃 said Don Quixote； 〃and as there is no
paper； it would be well done to write it on the leaves of trees； as
the ancients did； or on tablets of wax； though that would be as hard
to find just now as paper。 But it has just occurred to me how it may
be conveniently and even more than conveniently written； and that is
in the note…book that belonged to Cardenio； and thou wilt take care to
have it copied on paper； in a good hand； at the first village thou
comest to where there is a schoolmaster； or if not； any sacristan will
copy it； but see thou give it not to any notary to copy； for they
write a law hand that Satan could not make out。〃
〃But what is to be done about the signature？〃 said Sancho。
〃The letters of Amadis were never signed；〃 said Don Quixote。
〃That is all very well；〃 said Sancho； 〃but the order must needs be
signed； and if it is copied they will say the signature is false；
and I shall be left without ass…colts。〃
〃The order shall go signed in the same book；〃 said Don Quixote； 〃and
on seeing it my niece will make no difficulty about obeying it； as
to the loveletter thou canst put by way of signature； 'Yours till
death； the Knight of the Rueful Countenance。' And it will be no
great matter if it is in some other person's hand； for as well as I
recollect Dulcinea can neither read nor write； nor in the whole course
of her life has she seen handwriting or letter of mine； for my love
and hers have been always platonic； not going beyond a modest look；
and even that so seldom that I can safely swear I have not seen her
four times in all these twelve years I have been loving her more
than the light of these eyes that the earth will one day devour； and
perhaps even of those four times she has not once perceived that I was
looking at her： such is the retirement and seclusion in which her
father Lorenzo Corchuelo and her mother Aldonza Nogales have brought
her up。〃
〃So； so！〃 said Sancho； 〃Lorenzo Corchuelo's daughter is the lady
Dulcinea del Toboso； otherwise called Aldonza Lorenzo？〃
〃She it is；〃 said Don Quixote； 〃and she it is that is worthy to be
lady of the whole universe。〃
〃I know her well；〃 said Sancho； 〃and let me tell you she can fling a
crowbar as well as the lustiest lad in all the town。 Giver of all
good！ but she is a brave lass； and a right and stout one； and fit to
be helpmate to any knight…errant that is or is to be； who may make her
his lady： the whoreson wench； what sting she has and what a voice！ I
can tell you one day she posted herself on the top of the belfry of
the village to call some labourers of theirs that were in a ploughed
field of her father's； and though they were better than half a
league off they heard her as well as if they were at the foot of the
tower； and the best of her is that she is not a bit prudish； for she
has plenty of affability； and jokes with everybody； and has a grin and
a jest for everything。 So； Sir Knight of the Rueful Countenance； I say
you not only may and ought to do mad freaks for her sake； but you have
a good right to give way to despair and hang yourself； and no one
who knows of it but will say you did well； though the devil should
take you； and I wish I were on my road already； simply to see her； for
it is many a day since I saw her； and she must be altered by this
time； for going about the fields always； and the sun and the air spoil
women's looks greatly。 But I must own the truth to your worship； Senor
Don Quixote； until now I have been under a great mistake； for I
believed truly and honestly that the lady Dulcinea must be some
princess your worship was in love with； or some person great enough to
deserve the rich presents you have sent her； such as the Biscayan
and the galley slaves； and many more no doubt； for your worship must
have won many victories in the time when I was not yet your squire。
But all things considered； what good can it do the lady Aldonza
Lorenzo； I mean the lady Dulcinea del Toboso； to have the vanquished
your worship sends or will send coming to her and going down on
their knees before her？ Because may be when they came she'd be
hackling flax or threshing on the threshing floor； and they'd be
ashamed to see her； and she'd laugh； or resent the present。〃
〃I have before now told thee many times； Sancho；〃 said Don
Quixote； 〃that thou art a mighty great chatterer； and that with a
blunt wit thou art always striving at sharpness； but to show thee what
a fool thou art and how rational I am； I would have thee listen to a
short story。 Thou must know that a certain widow； fair； young；
independent； and rich； and above all free and easy； fell in love
with a sturdy strapping young lay…brother； his superior came to know
of it； and one day said to the worthy widow by way of brotherly
remonstrance； 'I am surprised； senora； and not without good reason；
that a woman of such high standing； so fair； and so rich as you are；
should have fallen in love with such a mean； low； stupid fellow as
So…and…so； when in this house there are so many masters； graduates；
and divinity students from among whom you might choose as if they were
a lot of pears； saying this one I'll take； that I won't take；' but she
replied to him with great sprightliness and candour； 'My dear sir； you
are very much mistaken； and your ideas are very old…fashioned； if
you think that I have made a bad choice in So…and…so； fool as he
seems； because for all I want with him he knows as much and more
philosophy than Aristotle。' In the same way； Sancho； for all I want
with Dulcinea del Toboso she is just as good as the most exalted
princess on earth。 It is not to be supposed that all those poets who
sang the praises of ladies under the fancy names they give them； had
any such mistresses。 Thinkest thou that the Amarillises； the
Phillises； the Sylvias； the Dianas； the Galateas； the Filidas； and all
the rest of them； that the books； the ballads； the barber's shops； the
theatres are full of； were really and truly ladies of flesh and blood；
and mistresses of those that glorify and have glorified them？
Nothing of the kind； they only invent them for the most part to
furnish a subject for their verses； and that they may pass for lovers；
or for men valiant enough to be so； and so it suffices me to think and
believe that the good Aldonza Lorenzo is fair and virtuous； and as
to her pedigree it is very