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Kentucky Jerks〃。 The spiritual achievements thus euphoniously
denominated 〃appear〃； says Mr。 Howitt； 〃to have been of a very disorderly
kind〃。 It appears that a certain Mr。 Doke； a Presbyterian clergyman； 〃was
first seized by the jerks〃； and the jerks laid hold of Mr。 Doke in that
unclerical way and with that scant respect for his cloth； that they 〃twitched
him about in a most extraordinary manner； often when in the pulpit； and
caused him to shout aloud； and run out of the pulpit into the woods；
screaming like a madman。 When the fit was over； he returned calmly to
his pulpit and finished the service。〃 The congregation having waited； we
presume； and edified themselves with the distant bellowings of Doke in
the woods； until he came back again； a little warm and hoarse； but
otherwise in fine condition。 〃People were often seized at hotels； and at
table would； on lifting a glass to drink； jerk the liquor to the ceiling； ladies
would at the breakfast…table suddenly be compelled to throw aloft their
coffee； and frequently break the cup and saucer。〃 A certain venturesome
clergyman vowed that he would preach down the Jerks； 〃but he was seized
in the midst of his attempt； and made so ridiculous that he withdrew
himself from further notice〃an example much to be commended。 That
same favoured land of America has been particularly favoured in the
development of 〃innumerable mediums〃； and Mr。 Howitt orders you to
believe in Daniel Dunglas Home； Andrew Davis Jackson； and Thomas L。
Harris； as 〃the three most remarkable； or most familiar； on this side of the
Atlantic〃。 Concerning Mr。 Home； the articles of belief （besides removal
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of furniture） are； That through him raps have been given and
communications made from deceased friends。 That 〃his hand has been
seized by spirit influence； and rapid communications written out； of a
surprising character to those to whom they were addressed〃。 That at his
bidding； 〃spirit hands have appeared which have been seen； felt； and
recognised frequently； by persons present； as those of deceased friends〃。
That he has been frequently lifted up and carried； floating 〃as it were〃
through a room； near the ceiling。 That in America； 〃all these phenomena
have displayed themselves in greater force than here〃which we have not
the slightest doubt of。 That he is 〃the planter of spiritualism all over
Europe〃。 That 〃by circumstances that no man could have devised； he
became the guest of the Emperor of the French； of the King of Holland； of
the Czar of Russia； and of many lesser princes〃。 That he returned from
〃this unpremeditated missionary tour〃； 〃endowed with competence〃； but
not before； 〃at the Tuileries； on one occasion when the emperor； empress；
a distinguished lady； and himself only were sitting at table； a hand
appeared； took up a pen； and wrote； in a strong and well…known character；
the word Napoleon。 The hand was then successively presented to the
several personages of the party to kiss。〃 The stout believer； having
disposed of Mr。 Home； and rested a little； will then proceed to believe in
Andrew Davis Jackson； or Andrew Jackson Davis （Mr。 Howitt； having no
Medium at hand to settle this difference and reveal the right name of the
seer； calls him by both names）； who merely 〃beheld all the essential
natures of things； saw the interior of men and animals； as perfectly as their
exterior； and described them in language so correct； that the most able
technologists could not surpass him。 He pointed out the proper remedies
for all the complaints； and the shops where they were to be obtained〃；in
the latter respect appearing to hail from an advertising circle； as we
conceive。 It was also in this gentleman's limited department to 〃see the
metals in the earth〃； and to have 〃the most distant regions and their
various productions present before him〃。 Having despatched this tough
case； the believer will pass on to Thomas L。 Harris； and will swallow HIM
easily； together with 〃whole epics〃 of his composition； a certain work 〃of
scarcely less than Miltonic grandeur〃； called The Lyric of the Golden Age…
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…a lyric pretty nigh as long as one of Mr。 Howitt's volumesdictated by Mr。
（not Mrs。） Harris to the publisher in ninety…four hours； and several
extempore sermons； possessing the remarkably lucid property of being
〃full； unforced； out…gushing； unstinted； and absorbing〃。 The candidate for
examination in pure belief； will then pass on to the spirit…photography
department； this； again； will be found in so… favoured America； under the
superintendence of Medium Mumler； a photographer of Boston： who
was 〃astonished〃 （though； on Mr。 Howitt's showing； he surely ought not to
have been） 〃on taking a photograph of himself； to find also by his side the
figure of a young girl； which he immediately recognised as that of a
deceased relative。 The circumstance made a great excitement。
Numbers of persons rushed to his rooms； and many have found deceased
friends photographed with themselves。〃 （Perhaps Mr。 Mumler； too； may
become 〃endowed with competence〃 in time。 Who knows？） Finally；
the true believers in the gospel according to Howitt； have； besides； but to
pin their faith on 〃ladies who see spirits habitually〃； on ladies who KNOW
they have a tendency to soar in the air on sufficient provocation； and on a
few other gnats to be taken after their camels； and they shall be
pronounced by Mr。 Howitt not of the stereotyped class of minds； and not
partakers of 〃the astonishing ignorance of the press〃； and shall receive a
first…class certificate of merit。
But before they pass through this portal into the Temple of Serene
Wisdom； we； halting blind and helpless on the steps； beg to suggest to
them what they must at once and for ever disbelieve。 They must
disbelieve that in the dark times； when very few were versed in what are
now the mere recreations of Science； and when those few formed a
priesthood…class apart； any marvels were wrought by the aid of concave
mirrors and a knowledge of the properties of certain odours and gases；
although the self…same marvels could be reproduced before their eyes at
the Polytechnic Institution； Regent Street； London； any day in the year。
They must by no means believe that Conjuring and Ventriloquism are old
trades。 They must disbelieve all Philosophical Transactions containing
the records of painful and careful inquiry into now familiar disorders of
the senses of seeing and hearing； and into the wonders of somnambulism；
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epilepsy； hysteria； miasmatic influence； vegetable poisons derived by
whole communities from corrupted air； diseased imitation； and moral
infection。 They must disbelieve all such awkward leading cases as the
case of the Woodstock Commissioners and their man； and the case of the
Identity of the Stockwell Ghost； with the maid…servant。 They must
disbelieve the vanishing of champion haunted houses （except； indeed； out
of Mr。 Howitt's book）； represented to have been closed and ruined for
years； before one day's inquiry by four gentlemen associated with this
journal； and one hour's reference to the Local Rate…books。 They must
disbelieve all possibility of a human