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the essays of montaigne, v17-第16章

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concealing it from him; acquitted him; moreover; from the acknowledgment
due to such a benefit。  Such as have merited from me friendship and
gratitude have never lost these by being no more; I have better and more
carefully paid them when gone and ignorant of what I did; I speak most
affectionately of my friends when they can no longer know it。  I have had
a hundred quarrels in defending Pompey and for the cause of Brutus; this
acquaintance yet continues betwixt us; we have no other hold even on
present things but by fancy。  Finding myself of no use to this age; I
throw myself back upon that other; and am so enamoured of it; that the
free; just; and flourishing state of that ancient Rome (for I neither
love it in its birth nor its old age) interests and impassionates me;
and therefore I cannot so often revisit the sites of their streets and
houses; and those ruins profound even to the Antipodes; that I am not
interested in them。  Is it by nature; or through error of fancy; that the
sight of places which we know to have been frequented and inhabited by
persons whose memories are recommended in story; moves us in some sort
more than to hear a recital of theiracts or to read their writings?

     〃Tanta vis admonitionis inest in locis。。。。Et id quidem in hac urbe
     infinitum; quacumque enim ingredimur; in aliquam historiam vestigium
     ponimus。〃

     '〃So great a power of reminiscence resides in places; and that truly
     in this city infinite; for which way soever we go; we find the
     traces of some story。〃Cicero; De Fin。; v。 I; 2。'

It pleases me to consider their face; bearing; and vestments: I pronounce
those great names betwixt my teeth; and make them ring in my ears:

     〃Ego illos veneror; et tantis nominibus semper assurgo。〃

     '〃I reverence them; and always rise to so great names。〃
     Seneca; Ep。; 64。'

Of things that are in some part great and admirable; I admire even the
common parts: I could wish to see them in familiar relations; walk; and
sup。  It were ingratitude to contemn the relics and images of so many
worthy and valiant men as I have seen live and die; and who; by their
example; give us so many good instructions; knew we how to follow them。

And; moreover; this very Rome that we now see; deserves to be beloved; so
long and by so many titles allied to our crown; the only common and
universal city; the sovereign magistrate that commands there is equally
acknowledged elsewhere 'tis the metropolitan city of all the Christian
nations the Spaniard and Frenchman is there at home: to be a prince of
that state; there needs no more but to be of Christendom wheresoever。
There is no place upon earth that heaven has embraced with such an
influence and constancy of favour; her very ruins are grand and glorious;

                〃Laudandis pretiosior ruinis。〃

          '〃More precious from her glorious ruins。〃
          Sidonius Apollinaris; Carm。; xxiii。; Narba; v。 62。'

she yet in her very tomb retains the marks and images of empire:

          〃Ut palam sit; uno in loco gaudentis opus esse naturx。〃

     '〃That it may be manifest that there is in one place the work of
     rejoicing nature。〃Pliny; Nat。 Hist。; iii。 5。'

Some would blame and be angry at themselves to perceive themselves
tickled with so vain a pleasure our humours are never too vain that are
pleasant let them be what they may; if they constantly content a man of
common understanding; I could not have the heart to blame him。

I am very much obliged to Fortune; in that; to this very hour; she has
offered me no outrage beyond what I was well able to bear。  Is it not her
custom to let those live in quiet by whom she is not importuned?

                   〃Quanto quisque sibi plum negaverit;
                    A diis plum feret: nil cupientium
                    Nudus castra peto 。  。  。  。
                    Multa petentibus
                    Desunt multa。〃

     '〃The more each man denies himself; the more the gods give him。
     Poor as I am; I seek the company of those who ask nothing; they who
     desire much will be deficient in much。〃
     Horace; Od。; iii。 16;21;42。'

If she continue her favour; she will dismiss me very well satisfied:

                                   〃Nihil supra
                         Deos lacesso。〃

     '〃I trouble the gods no farther。〃Horace; Od。; ii。 18; 11。'

But beware a shock: there are a thousand who perish in the port。
I easily comfort myself for what shall here happen when I shall be gone;
present things trouble me enough:

                       〃Fortunae caetera mando。〃

          '〃I leave the rest to fortune。〃Ovid; Metam。; ii。 140。'

Besides; I have not that strong obligation that they say ties men to the
future; by the issue that succeeds to their name and honour; and
peradventure; ought less to covet them; if they are to be so much
desired。  I am but too much tied to the world; and to this life; of
myself: I am content to be in Fortune's power by circumstances properly
necessary to my being; without otherwise enlarging her jurisdiction over
me; and have never thought that to be without children was a defect that
ought to render life less complete or less contented: a sterile vocation
has its conveniences too。  Children are of the number of things that are
not so much to be desired; especially now that it would be so hard to
make them good:

      〃Bona jam nec nasci licet; ita corrupta Bunt semina;〃

     '〃Nothing good can be born now; the seed is so corrupt。〃
     Tertullian; De Pudicita。'

and yet they are justly to be lamented by such as lose them when they
have them。

He who left me my house in charge; foretold that I was like to ruin it;
considering my humour so little inclined to look after household affairs。
But he was mistaken; for I am in the same condition now as when I first
entered into it; or rather somewhat better; and yet without office or any
place of profit。

As to the rest; if Fortune has never done me any violent or extraordinary
injury; neither has she done me any particular favour; whatever we derive
from her bounty; was there above a hundred years before my time: I have;
as to my own particular; no essential and solid good; that I stand
indebted for to her liberality。  She has; indeed; done me some airy
favours; honorary and titular favours; without substance; and those in
truth she has not granted; but offered me; who; God knows; am all
material; and who take nothing but what is real; and indeed massive too;
for current pay: and who; if I durst confess so much; should not think
avarice much less excusable than ambition: nor pain less to be avoided
than shame; nor health less to be coveted than learning; or riches than
nobility。

Amongst those empty favours of hers; there is none that so much pleases
vain humour natural to my country; as an authentic bull of a Roman
burgess…ship; that was granted me when I was last there; glorious in
seals and gilded letters; and granted with all gracious liberality。  And
because 'tis couched in a mixt style; more or less favourable; and that I
could have been glad to have seen a copy of it before it had passed the
seal。

Being before burgess of no city at all; I am glad to be created one of
the most noble that ever was or ever shall be。  If other men would
consider themselves at the rate I do; they would; as I do; discover
themselves to be full of inanity and foppery; to rid myself of it; I
cannot; without making myself away。  We are all steeped in it; as well
one as another; but they who are not aware on't; have somewhat the better
bargain; and yet I know not whether they have or no。

This opinion and common usage to observe others more than ourselves has
very much relieved us that way: 'tis a very displeasing object: we can
there see nothing but misery and vanity: nature; that we may not be
dejected with the sight of our own deformities; has wisely thrust the
action of seeing outward。  We go forward with the current; but to turn
back towards ourselves is a painful motion; so is the sea moved and
troubled when the waves rush against one another。  Observe; says every
one; the motions of the heavens; of public affairs; observe the quarrel
of such a person; take notice of such a one's pulse; of such another's
last will and testament; in sum; be always looking high or low; on one
side; before or behind you。  It was a paradoxical command anciently given
us by that god of Delphos: 〃Look into yourself; discover yourself; keep
close to yourself; call back your mind and will; that elsewhere consume
themselves into yourself; you run out; you spill yourself; carry a more
steady hand: men betray you; men spill you; men steal you from yourself。
Dost thou not see that this world we live in keeps all its sight confined
within; and its eyes open to contemplate itself?  'Tis always vanity for
thee; both within and without; but 'tis less vanity when less extended。
Excepting thee; O man; said that god; everything studies itself first;
and has bounds to its labours and desires; according to its need。  There
is nothing so empty and necessitous as thou; who embracest the universe;
thou art the invest
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