按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
〃That is nothing；〃 the Monkey said。 And going to a bigger pine； he
rose by his own unaided exertions to the top branch； where he sat；
all bedaubed with the pitch which that vegetable exudes。 〃Now；〃 he
added； 〃I am a self…made Monkey。〃
The Patriot and the Banker
A PATRIOT who had taken office poor and retired rich was introduced
at a bank where he desired to open an account。
〃With pleasure；〃 said the Honest Banker； 〃we shall be glad to do
business with you； but first you must make yourself an honest man
by restoring what you stole from the Government。〃
〃Good heavens！〃 cried the Patriot； 〃if I do that； I shall have
nothing to deposit with you。〃
〃I don't see that；〃 the Honest Banker replied。 〃We are not the
whole American people。〃
〃Ah； I understand；〃 said the Patriot； musing。 〃At what sum do you
estimate this bank's proportion of the country's loss by me？〃
〃About a dollar；〃 answered the Honest Banker。
And with a proud consciousness of serving his country wisely and
well he charged that sum to the account。
The Mourning Brothers
OBSERVING that he was about to die； an Old Man called his two Sons
to his bedside and expounded the situation。
〃My children；〃 said he； 〃you have not shown me many marks of
respect during my life； but you will attest your sorrow for my
death。 To him who the longer wears a weed upon his hat in memory
of me shall go my entire fortune。 I have made a will to that
effect。〃
So when the Old Man was dead each of the youths put a weed upon his
hat and wore it until he was himself old； when； seeing that neither
would give in； they agreed that the younger should leave off his
weeds and the elder give him half of the estate。 But when the
elder applied for the property he found that there had been an
Executor！
Thus were hypocrisy and obstinacy fitly punished。
The Disinterested Arbiter
TWO Dogs who had been fighting for a bone； without advantage to
either； referred their dispute to a Sheep。 The Sheep patiently
heard their statements； then flung the bone into a pond。
〃Why did you do that？〃 said the Dogs。
〃Because；〃 replied the Sheep； 〃I am a vegetarian。〃
The Thief and the Honest Man
A THIEF who had brought a suit against his accomplices to recover
his share of the plunder taken from an Honest Man； demanded the
Honest Man's attendance at the trial to testify to his loss。 But
the Honest Man explained that as he was merely the agent of a
company of other honest men it was none of his affair； and when the
officers came to serve him with a subpoena he hid himself behind
his back and wiled away the dragging hours of retirement and
inaction by picking his own pockets。
The Dutiful Son
A MILLIONAIRE who had gone to an almshouse to visit his father met
a Neighbour there； who was greatly surprised。
〃What！〃 said the Neighbour； 〃you do sometimes visit your father？〃
〃If our situations were reversed；〃 said the Millionaire； 〃I am sure
he would visit me。 The old man has always been rather proud of me。
Besides；〃 he added； softly； 〃I had to have his signature； I am
insuring his life。〃
AESOPUS EMENDATUS
The Cat and the Youth
A CAT fell in love with a handsome Young Man； and entreated Venus
to change her into a woman。
〃I should think；〃 said Venus； 〃you might make so trifling a change
without bothering me。 However； be a woman。〃
Afterward； wishing to see if the change were complete； Venus caused
a mouse to approach； whereupon the woman shrieked and made such a
show of herself that the Young Man would not marry her。
The Farmer and His Sons
A FARMER being about to die； and knowing that during his illness
his Sons had permitted the vineyard to become overgrown with weeds
while they improved the shining hour by gambling with the doctor；
said to them：
〃My boys； there is a great treasure buried in the vineyard。 You
dig in the ground until you find it。〃
So the Sons dug up all the weeds； and all the vines too； and even
neglected to bury the old man。
Jupiter and the Baby Show
JUPITER held a baby show； open to all animals； and a Monkey entered
her hideous cub for a prize； but Jupiter only laughed at her。
〃It is all very well；〃 said the Monkey； 〃to laugh at my offspring；
but you go into any gallery of antique sculpture and look at the
statues and busts of the fellows that you begot yourself。〃
〃'Sh！ don't expose me；〃 said Jupiter； and awarded her the first
prize。
The Man and the Dog
A MAN who had been bitten by a Dog was told that the wound would
heal if he would dip a piece of bread in the blood and give it to
the Dog。 He did so。
〃No；〃 said the Dog； 〃if I were to accept that； it might be thought
that in biting you I was actuated by improper motives。〃
〃And by what motives were you actuated？〃 asked the Man。
〃I desired；〃 replied the Dog； 〃merely to harmonise myself with the
Divine Scheme of Things。 I'm a child of Nature。〃
The Cat and the Birds
HEARING that the Birds in an aviary were ill； a Cat went to them
and said that he was a physician； and would cure them if they would
let him in。
〃To what school of medicine do you belong？〃 asked the Birds。
〃I am a Miaulopathist；〃 said the Cat。
〃Did you ever practise Gohomoeopathy？〃 the Birds inquired； winking
faintly。
The Cat took the hint and his leave。
Mercury and the Woodchopper
A WOODCHOPPER； who had dropped his axe into a deep pool； besought
Mercury to recover it for him。 That thoughtless deity immediately
plunged into the pool； which became so salivated that the trees
about its margin all came loose and dropped out。
The Fox and the Grapes
A FOX； seeing some sour grapes hanging within an inch of his nose；
and being unwilling to admit that there was anything he would not
eat； solemnly declared that they were out of his reach。
The Penitent Thief
A BOY who had been taught by his Mother to steal grew to be a man
and was a professional public official。 One day he was taken in
the act and condemned to die。 While going to the place of
execution he passed his Mother and said to her：
〃Behold your work！ If you had not taught me to steal； I should not
have come to this。〃
〃Indeed！〃 said the Mother。 〃And who； pray； taught you to be
detected？〃
The Archer and the Eagle
AN Eagle mortally wounded by an Archer was greatly comforted to
observe that the arrow was feathered with one of his own quills。
〃I should have felt bad； indeed；〃 he said； 〃to think that any other
eagle had a hand in this。〃
Truth and the Traveller
A MAN travelling in a desert met a Woman。
〃Who art thou？〃 asked the Man； 〃and why dost thou dwell in this
dreadful place？〃
〃My name；〃 replied the Woman； 〃is Truth； and I live in the desert
in order to be near my worshippers when they are driven from among
their fellows。 They all come； sooner or later。〃
〃Well；〃 said the Man； looking about； 〃the country doesn't seem to
be very thickly settled here。〃
The Wolf and the Lamb
A LAMB； pursued by a Wolf； fled into the temple。
〃The priest will catch you and sacrifice you；〃 said the Wolf； 〃if
you remain there。〃
〃It is just as well to be sacrificed by the priest as to be eaten
by you；〃 said the Lamb。
〃My friend；〃 said the Wolf； 〃it pains me to see you considering so
great a question from a purely selfish point of view。 It is not
just as well for me。〃
The Lion and the Boar
A LION and a Boar； who were fighting for water at a pool； saw some
vultures hovering significantly above them。 〃Let us make up our
quarrel；〃 said the Boar； 〃or these fellows will get one of us；
sure。〃
〃I should not so much mind that；〃 replied the Lion； 〃if they would
get the right one。 However； I am willing to stop fighting； and
then perhaps I can grab a vulture。 I like chicken better than
pork； anyhow。〃
The Grasshopp