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I have scarce yet recovered the two last。
MAY 18TH。
My progress is crabwise； and I fear only IX。 chapters will be
ready for the mail。 I am on p。 88 again； and with half an
idea of going back again to 85。 We shall see when we come to
read： I used to regard reading as a pleasure in my old light
days。 All the house are down with the influenza in a body；
except Fanny and me。 The influenza appears to become endemic
here； but it has always been a scourge in the islands。
Witness the beginning of THE EBB TIDE； which was observed
long before the Iffle had distinguished himself at home by
such Napoleonic conquests。 I am now of course 'quite a
recluse；' and it is very stale； and there is no amanuensis to
carry me over my mail； to which I shall have to devote many
hours that would have been more usefully devoted to THE EBB
TIDE。 For you know you can dictate at all hours of the day
and at any odd moment； but to sit down and write with your
red right hand is a very different matter。
MAY 20TH。
Well； I believe I've about finished the thing； I mean as far
as the mail is to take it。 Chapter X。 is now in Lloyd's
hands for remarks； and extends in its present form to p。 93
incl。 On the 12th of May； I see by looking back； I was on p。
82； not for the first time； so that I have made 11 pages in
nine livelong days。 Well！ up a high hill he heaved a huge
round stone。 But this Flaubert business must be resisted in
the premises。 Or is it the result of influenza？ God forbid。
Fanny is down now； and the last link that bound me to my
fellow men is severed。 I sit up here； and write； and read
Renan's ORIGINES； which is certainly devilish interesting； I
read his Nero yesterday； it is very good； O； very good！ But
he is quite a Michelet； the general views； and such a piece
of character painting； excellent； but his method sheer
lunacy。 You can see him take up the block which he had just
rejected； and make of it the corner…stone： a maddening way to
deal with authorities； and the result so little like history
that one almost blames oneself for wasting time。 But the
time is not wasted； the conspectus is always good； and the
blur that remains on the mind is probably just enough。 I
have been enchanted with the unveiling of Revelations。 And
how picturesque that return of the false Nero！ The Apostle
John is rather discredited。 And to think how one had read
the thing so often； and never understood the attacks upon St。
Paul！ I remember when I was a child； and we came to the Four
Beasts that were all over eyes； the sickening terror with
which I was filled。 If that was Heaven； what； in the name of
Davy Jones and the aboriginal night…mare； could Hell be？
Take it for all in all； L'ANTECHRIST is worth reading。 The
HISTOIRE D'ISRAEL did not surprise me much； I had read those
Hebrew sources with more intelligence than the New Testament；
and was quite prepared to admire Ahab and Jezebel； etc。
Indeed； Ahab has always been rather a hero of mine； I mean
since the years of discretion。
MAY 21ST。
And here I am back again on p。 85！ the last chapter demanding
an entire revision； which accordingly it is to get。 And
where my mail is to come in； God knows！ This forced；
violent； alembicated style is most abhorrent to me； it can't
be helped； the note was struck years ago on the JANET NICOLL；
and has to be maintained somehow； and I can only hope the
intrinsic horror and pathos； and a kind of fierce glow of
colour there is to it； and the surely remarkable wealth of
striking incident； may guide our little shallop into port。
If Gordon Browne is to get it； he should see the Brassey
photographs of Papeete。 But mind； the three waifs were never
in the town； only on the beach and in the calaboose。 By
George； but it's a good thing to illustrate for a man like
that！ Fanny is all right again。 False alarm！ I was down
yesterday afternoon at Paupata； and heard much growling of
war； and the delightful news that the C。 J。 and the President
are going to run away from Mulinuu and take refuge in the
Tivoli hotel。
23RD。 MAIL DAY。
And lots of pleasures before me； no doubt！ Among others the
attempt to extract an answer from … before mail time； which
may succeed or may not。
THE EBB TIDE； all but （I take it） fifteen pages； is now in
your hands … possibly only about eleven pp。 It is hard to
say。 But there it is； and you can do your best with it。
Personally； I believe I would in this case make even a
sacrifice to get Gordon Browne and copious illustration。 I
guess in ten days I shall have finished with it； then I go
next to D。 BALFOUR； and get the proofs ready： a nasty job for
me； as you know。 And then？ Well； perhaps I'll take a go at
the family history。 I think that will be wise； as I am so
much off work。 And then； I suppose； WEIR OF HERMISTON； but
it may be anything。 I am discontented with THE EBB TIDE；
naturally； there seems such a veil of words over it； and I
like more and more naked writing； and yet sometimes one has a
longing for full colour and there comes the veil again。 THE
YOUNG CHEVALIER is in very full colour； and I fear it for
that reason。 …
Ever；
R。 L S。
CHAPTER XXX
29TH MAY。
MY DEAR COLVIN； … Still grinding at Chap。 XI。 I began many
days ago on p。 93； and am still on p。 93； which is
exhilarating； but the thing takes shape all the same and
should make a pretty lively chapter for an end of it。 For
XII。 is only a footnote AD EXPLICANDUM。
JUNE THE 1ST。
Back on p。 93。 I was on 100 yesterday； but read it over and
condemned it。
10 A。 M。
I have worked up again to 97； but how？ The deuce fly away
with literature； for the basest sport in creation。 But it's
got to come straight！ and if possible； so that I may finish
D。 BALFOUR in time for the same mail。 What a getting
upstairs！ This is Flaubert outdone。 Belle； Graham； and
Lloyd leave to…day on a malaga down the coast； to be absent a
week or so： this leaves Fanny； me； and …； who seems a nice；
kindly fellow。
JUNE 2ND。
I am nearly dead with dyspepsia； over…smoking； and
unremunerative overwork。 Last night； I went to bed by seven；
woke up again about ten for a minute to find myself light…
headed and altogether off my legs； went to sleep again； and
woke this morning fairly fit。 I have crippled on to p。 101；
but I haven't read it yet； so do not boast。 What kills me is
the frame of mind of one of the characters； I cannot get it
through。 Of course that does not interfere with my total
inability to write； so that yesterday I was a living half…
hour upon a single clause and have a gallery of variants that
would surprise you。 And this sort of trouble （which I cannot
avoid） unfortunately produces nothing when done but
alembication and the far…fetched。 Well； read it with mercy！
8 A。M。
Going to bed。 Have read it； and believe the chapter
practically done at last。 But lord！ it has been a business。
JULY 3RD； 8。15。
The draft is finished； the end of Chapter II。 and the tale；
and I have only eight pages WIEDERZUARBEITEN。 This is just a
cry of joy in passing。
10。30。
Knocked out of time。 Did 101 and 102。 Alas； no more to…day；
as I have to go down town to a meeting。 Just as well though；
as my thumb is about done up。
SUNDAY； JUNE 4TH。
Now for a little snippet of my life。 Yesterday； 12。30； in a
heavenly day of sun and trade； I mounted my horse and set
off。 A boy opens my gate for me。 'Sleep and long life！ A
blessing on your journey；' says he。 And I reply 'Sleep； long
life！ A blessing on the house！' Then on； down the lime
lane； a rugged； narrow； winding way； that seems almost as if
it was leading you into Lyonesse； and you might see the head
and shoulders of a giant looking in。 At the corner of the
road I meet the inspector of taxes； and hold a diplomatic
interview with him； he wants me to pay taxes on the new
house； I am informed I should not till next year； and we
part； RE INFECTA； he promising to bring me decisions； I
assuring him that； if I find any favouritism； he will find me
the most recalcitrant tax…payer on the island。 Then I have a
talk with an old servant by the wayside。 A little further I
pass two children coming up。 'Love！' say I； 'are you two
chiefly…proceeding inland？' and they say； 'Love！ yes！' and
the interesting ceremony is finished。 Down to the post
office； where I find Vitrolles and （Heaven reward you！） the
White Book； just arrived per UPOLU； having gone the wrong way
round； by Australia； also six copies of ISLAND NIGHTS'
ENTERTAINMENTS。 Some of Weatherall's illustrations are very
clever； but O Lo