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〃Why should I？ There are enough folks who do。 The world needs
people like me； Anne； just to amuse it。 It would be a terrible
place if EVERYBODY were intellectual and serious and in deep；
deadly earnest。 MY mission is； as Josiah Allen says； ‘to charm
and allure。' Confess now。 Hasn't life at Patty's Place been
really much brighter and pleasanter this past winter because
I've been here to leaven you？〃
〃Yes； it has；〃 owned Anne。
〃And you all love me even Aunt Jamesina； who thinks I'm stark mad。
So why should I try to be different？ Oh； dear； I'm so sleepy。 I was
awake until one last night； reading a harrowing ghost story。 I read
it in bed； and after I had finished it do you suppose I could get out
of bed to put the light out？ No！ And if Stella had not fortunately
come in late that lamp would have burned good and bright till morning。
When I heard Stella I called her in； explained my predicament； and got
her to put out the light。 If I had got out myself to do it I knew
something would grab me by the feet when I was getting in again。
By the way； Anne； has Aunt Jamesina decided what to do this summer？〃
〃Yes； she's going to stay here。 I know she's doing it for the
sake of those blessed cats； although she says it's too much
trouble to open her own house； and she hates visiting。〃
〃What are you reading？〃
〃Pickwick。〃
〃That's a book that always makes me hungry；〃 said Phil。 〃There's so
much good eating in it。 The characters seem always to be reveling
on ham and eggs and milk punch。 I generally go on a cupboard rummage
after reading Pickwick。 The mere thought reminds me that I'm starving。
Is there any tidbit in the pantry； Queen Anne？〃
〃I made a lemon pie this morning。 You may have a piece of it。〃
Phil dashed out to the pantry and Anne betook herself to the
orchard in company with Rusty。 It was a moist； pleasantly…
odorous night in early spring。 The snow was not quite all gone
from the park； a little dingy bank of it yet lay under the pines
of the harbor road； screened from the influence of April suns。
It kept the harbor road muddy； and chilled the evening air。
But grass was growing green in sheltered spots and Gilbert
had found some pale； sweet arbutus in a hidden corner。
He came up from the park； his hands full of it。
Anne was sitting on the big gray boulder in the orchard looking
at the poem of a bare； birchen bough hanging against the pale red
sunset with the very perfection of grace。 She was building a
castle in air a wondrous mansion whose sunlit courts and
stately halls were steeped in Araby's perfume； and where she
reigned queen and chatelaine。 She frowned as she saw Gilbert
coming through the orchard。 Of late she had managed not to be
left alone with Gilbert。 But he had caught her fairly now； and
even Rusty had deserted her。
Gilbert sat down beside her on the boulder and held out his Mayflowers。
〃Don't these remind you of home and our old schoolday picnics； Anne？〃
Anne took them and buried her face in them。
〃I'm in Mr。 Silas Sloane's barrens this very minute；〃 she said rapturously。
〃I suppose you will be there in reality in a few days？〃
〃No； not for a fortnight。 I'm going to visit with Phil in Bolingbroke
before I go home。 You'll be in Avonlea before I will。〃
〃No； I shall not be in Avonlea at all this summer； Anne。 I've been
offered a job in the Daily News office and I'm going to take it。〃
〃Oh；〃 said Anne vaguely。 She wondered what a whole Avonlea summer
would be like without Gilbert。 Somehow she did not like the prospect。
〃Well；〃 she concluded flatly； 〃it is a good thing for you； of course。〃
〃Yes； I've been hoping I would get it。 It will help me out next year。〃
〃You mustn't work too HARD；〃 said Anne； without any very clear
idea of what she was saying。 She wished desperately that Phil
would come out。 〃You've studied very constantly this winter。
Isn't this a delightful evening？ Do you know； I found a cluster
of white violets under that old twisted tree over there today？
I felt as if I had discovered a gold mine。〃
〃You are always discovering gold mines；〃 said Gilbert also absently。
〃Let us go and see if we can find some more；〃 suggested Anne eagerly。
〃I'll call Phil and 〃
〃Never mind Phil and the violets just now； Anne；〃 said Gilbert quietly；
taking her hand in a clasp from which she could not free it。 〃There is
something I want to say to you。〃
〃Oh； don't say it；〃 cried Anne； pleadingly。 〃Don't PLEASE； Gilbert。〃
〃I must。 Things can't go on like this any longer。 Anne； I love you。
You know I do。 I I can't tell you how much。 Will you promise me
that some day you'll be my wife？〃
〃I I can't；〃 said Anne miserably。 〃Oh； Gilbert you
you've spoiled everything。〃
〃Don't you care for me at all？〃 Gilbert asked after a very
dreadful pause； during which Anne had not dared to look up。
〃Not not in that way。 I do care a great deal for you as a friend。
But I don't love you； Gilbert。〃
〃But can't you give me some hope that you will yet？〃
〃No； I can't；〃 exclaimed Anne desperately。 〃I never； never can
love you in that way Gilbert。 You must never speak of this
to me again。〃
There was another pause so long and so dreadful that Anne was
driven at last to look up。 Gilbert's face was white to the lips。
And his eyes but Anne shuddered and looked away。 There was
nothing romantic about this。 Must proposals be either grotesque
or horrible？ Could she ever forget Gilbert's face？
〃Is there anybody else？〃 he asked at last in a low voice。
〃No no；〃 said Anne eagerly。 〃I don't care for any one like
THAT and I LIKE you better than anybody else in the world；
Gilbert。 And we must we must go on being friends； Gilbert。〃
Gilbert gave a bitter little laugh。
〃Friends！ Your friendship can't satisfy me； Anne。 I want your love
and you tell me I can never have that。〃
〃I'm sorry。 Forgive me； Gilbert；〃 was all Anne could say。
Where； oh； where were all the gracious and graceful speeches
wherewith； in imagination； she had been wont to dismiss
rejected suitors？
Gilbert released her hand gently。
〃There isn't anything to forgive。 There have been times when I thought
you did care。 I've deceived myself； that's all。 Goodbye； Anne。〃
Anne got herself to her room； sat down on her window seat behind
the pines； and cried bitterly。 She felt as if something incalculably
precious had gone out of her life。 It was Gilbert's friendship；
of course。 Oh； why must she lose it after this fashion？
〃What is the matter； honey？〃 asked Phil； coming in through
the moonlit gloom。
Anne did not answer。 At that moment she wished Phil were a
thousand miles away。
〃I suppose you've gone and refused Gilbert Blythe。 You are an idiot；
Anne Shirley！〃
〃Do you call it idiotic to refuse to marry a man I don't love？〃
said Anne coldly； goaded to reply。
〃You don't know love when you see it。 You've tricked something
out with your imagination that you think love； and you expect the
real thing to look like that。 There； that's the first sensible
thing I've ever said in my life。 I wonder how I managed it？〃
〃Phil；〃 pleaded Anne； 〃please go away and leave me alone for
a little while。 My world has tumbled into pieces。 I want to
reconstruct it。〃
〃Without any Gilbert in it？〃 said Phil； going。
A world without any Gilbert in it！ Anne repeated the words drearily。
Would it not be a very lonely； forlorn place？ Well； it was all
Gilbert's fault。 He had spoiled their beautiful comradeship。
She must just learn to live without it。
Chapter XXI
Roses of Yesterday
The fortnight Anne spent in Bolingbroke was a very pleasant one；
with a little under current of vague pain and dissatisfaction
running through it whenever she thought about Gilbert。 There was
not； however； much time to think about him。 〃Mount Holly；〃 the
beautiful old Gordon homestead； was a very gay place； overrun by
Phil's friends of both sexes。 There was quite a bewildering
succession of drives； dances； picnics and boating parties； all
expressively lumped together by Phil under the head of 〃jamborees〃；
Alec and Alonzo were so constantly on hand that Anne wondered if
they ever did anything but dance attendance on that will…o'…the…wisp
of a Phil。 They were both nice； manly fellows； but Anne would not
be drawn into any opinion as to which was the nicer。
〃And I depended so on you to help me make up my mind which of them I
should promise to marry；〃 mourned Phil。
〃You must do that for yourself。 You are quite expert at making
up your mind as to whom other people should marry；〃 retorted Anne；
rather caustically。
〃Oh； that's a very different thing；〃 said Phil； truly。
But the sweetest incident of Anne's sojourn in Bolingbroke was the
visit to her birthpl