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frozen tank to wash in。 That was the first that brought me grief； And made
me weep； till I sought relief In an emblematical handkerchief； To choke
such baby bosh in。
First and worst in the grim array… Ghosts of ghosts that have gone their
way； Which I wouldn't revive for a single day For all the wealth of
PLUTUS … Are the horrible ghosts that school…days scared： If the classical
ghost that BRUTUS dared Was the ghost of his 〃Caesar〃 unprepared； I'm
sure I pity BRUTUS。
I pass to critical seventeen； The ghost of that terrible wedding scene；
When an elderly Colonel stole my Queen； And woke my dream of heaven。
No schoolgirl decked in her nurse…room curls Was my gushing innocent
Queen of Pearls； If she wasn't a girl of a thousand girls； She was one of
forty…seven！
I see the ghost of my first cigar； Of the thence…arising family jar … Of
my maiden brief （I was at the Bar； And I called the Judge 〃Your wushup！〃）
Of reckless days and reckless nights； With wrenched…off knockers；
extinguished lights； Unholy songs and tipsy fights； Which I strove in vain
to hush up。
Ghosts of fraudulent joint…stock banks； Ghosts of 〃copy； declined with
thanks；〃 Of novels returned in endless ranks； And thousands more； I suffer。
The only line to fitly grace My humble tomb； when I've run my race； Is；
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〃Reader； this is the resting…place Of an unsuccessful duffer。〃
I've fought them all； these ghosts of mine； But the weapons I've used
are sighs and brine； And now that I'm nearly forty…nine； Old age is my
chiefest bogy； For my hair is thinning away at the crown； And the silver
fights with the worn…out brown； And a general verdict sets me down As an
irreclaimable fogy。
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Ballad： The Bishop And The
'Busman
It was a Bishop bold； And London was his see； He was short and stout
and round about And zealous as could be。
It also was a Jew； Who drove a Putney 'bus … For flesh of swine
however fine He did not care a cuss。
His name was HASH BAZ BEN； And JEDEDIAH too； And
SOLOMON and ZABULON … This 'bus…directing Jew。
The Bishop said； said he； 〃I'll see what I can do To Christianise and
make you wise； You poor benighted Jew。〃
So every blessed day That 'bus he rode outside； From Fulham town；
both up and down； And loudly thus he cried：
〃His name is HASH BAZ BEN； And JEDEDIAH too； And
SOLOMON and ZABULON … This 'bus…directing Jew。〃
At first the 'busman smiled； And rather liked the fun … He merely
smiled； that Hebrew child； And said； 〃Eccentric one！〃
And gay young dogs would wait To see the 'bus go by （These gay
young dogs； in striking togs）； To hear the Bishop cry：
〃Observe his grisly beard； His race it clearly shows； He sticks no fork
in ham or pork … Observe； my friends； his nose。
〃His name is HASH BAZ BEN； And JEDEDIAH too； And
SOLOMON and ZABULON … This 'bus…directing Jew。〃
But though at first amused； Yet after seven years； This Hebrew child
got rather riled； And melted into tears。
He really almost feared To leave his poor abode； His nose； and name；
and beard became A byword on that road。
At length he swore an oath； The reason he would know … 〃I'll call and
see why ever he Does persecute me so！〃
The good old Bishop sat On his ancestral chair； The 'busman came；
sent up his name； And laid his grievance bare。
〃Benighted Jew；〃 he said （The good old Bishop did）； 〃Be Christian；
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you； instead of Jew … Become a Christian kid！
〃I'll ne'er annoy you more。〃 〃Indeed？〃 replied the Jew； 〃Shall I be
freed？〃 〃You will； indeed！〃 Then 〃Done！〃 said he； 〃with you！〃
The organ which； in man； Between the eyebrows grows； Fell from his
face； and in its place He found a Christian nose。
His tangled Hebrew beard； Which to his waist came down； Was now a
pair of whiskers fair … His name ADOLPHUS BROWN！
He wedded in a year That prelate's daughter JANE； He's grown quite
fair … has auburn hair … His wife is far from plain。
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Ballad： The Troubadour
A TROUBADOUR he played Without a castle wall； Within； a hapless
maid Responded to his call。
〃Oh； willow； woe is me！ Alack and well…a…day！ If I were only free I'd
hie me far away！〃
Unknown her face and name； But this he knew right well； The
maiden's wailing came From out a dungeon cell。
A hapless woman lay Within that dungeon grim … That fact； I've heard
him say； Was quite enough for him。
〃I will not sit or lie； Or eat or drink； I vow； Till thou art free as I； Or I
as pent as thou。〃
Her tears then ceased to flow； Her wails no longer rang； And tuneful in
her woe The prisoned maiden sang：
〃Oh； stranger； as you play； I recognize your touch； And all that I can
say Is； thank you very much。〃
He seized his clarion straight； And blew thereat； until A warden oped
the gate。 〃Oh； what might be your will？〃
〃I've come； Sir Knave； to see The master of these halls： A maid
unwillingly Lies prisoned in their walls。〃'
With barely stifled sigh That porter drooped his head； With teardrops
in his eye； 〃A many； sir；〃 he said。
He stayed to hear no more； But pushed that porter by； And shortly
stood before SIR HUGH DE PECKHAM RYE。
SIR HUGH he darkly frowned； 〃What would you； sir； with me？〃 The
troubadour he downed Upon his bended knee。
〃I've come； DE PECKHAM RYE； To do a Christian task； You ask me
what would I？ It is not much I ask。
〃Release these maidens； sir； Whom you dominion o'er … Particularly
her Upon the second floor。
〃And if you don't； my lord〃 … He here stood bolt upright； And tapped a
tailor's sword … 〃Come out； you cad； and fight！〃
SIR HUGH he called … and ran The warden from the gate： 〃Go； show
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this gentleman The maid in Forty…eight。〃
By many a cell they past； And stopped at length before A portal； bolted
fast： The man unlocked the door。
He called inside the gate With coarse and brutal shout； 〃Come； step it；
Forty…eight！〃 And Forty…eight stepped out。
〃They gets it pretty hot； The maidens what we cotch … Two years this
lady's got For collaring a wotch。〃
〃Oh； ah！ … indeed … I see；〃 The troubadour exclaimed … 〃If I may make
so free； How is this castle named？
The warden's eyelids fill； And sighing； he replied； 〃Of gloomy
Pentonville This is the female side！〃
The minstrel did not wait The Warden stout to thank； But recollected
straight He'd business at the Bank。
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Ballad： Ferdinando And Elvira； Or；
The Gentle Pieman
PART I。
At a pleasant evening party I had taken down to supper One whom I
will call ELVIRA； and we talked of love and TUPPER；
MR。 TUPPER and the Poets； very lightly with them dealing； For I've
always been distinguished for a strong poetic feeling。
Then we let off paper crackers； each of which contained a motto； And
she listened while I read them； till her mother told her not to。
Then she whispered； 〃To the ball…room we had better； dear； be walking；
If we stop down here much longer； really people will be talking。〃
There were noblemen in coronets； and military cousins； There were
captains by the hundred； there were baronets by dozens。
Yet she heeded not their offers； but dismissed them with a blessing；
Then she let down all her back hair； which had taken long in dressing。
Then she had convulsive sobbings in her agitated throttle； Then she
wiped her pretty eyes and smelt her pretty smelling… bottle。
So I whispered； 〃Dear ELVIRA；