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〃We're not afraidas long as the gate is
locked；〃 declared the Chief。 〃And we didn't insult
them at all。 One of us made a joke that the stupid
Hoppers couldn't see。〃
The Chief smiled as he said this and the smile
made his face look quite jolly。
〃What was the joke？〃 asked Scraps。
〃A Horner said they have less understanding than
we； because they've only one leg。 Ha； ha！ You see
the point； don't you？ If you stand on your legs；
and your legs are under you； thenha； ha； ha！
then your legs are your under…standing。 Hee； bee；
hee！ Ho； ho！ My； but that's a fine joke。 And the
stupid Hoppers couldn't see it！ They couldn't see
that with only one leg they must have less
under…standing than we who have two legs。 Ha； ha；
ha！ Hee； bee！ Ho； ho！〃 The Chief wiped the tears
of laughter from his eyes with the bottom hem of
his white robe； and all the other Horners wiped
their eyes on their robes； for they had laughed
just as heartily as their Chief at the absurd
joke。
〃Then；〃 said Scraps； 〃their understanding of the
understanding you meant led to the
misunderstanding。〃
〃Exactly； and so there's no need for us to
apologize；〃 returned the Chief。
〃No need for an apology； perhaps； but much need
for an explanation；〃 said Scraps decidedly。 〃You
don't want war； do you？〃
〃Not if we can help it；〃 admitted Jak Horner。
〃The question is； who's going to explain the joke
to the Horners？ You know it spoils any joke to be
obliged to explain it； and this is the best joke I
ever heard。〃
〃Who made the joke？〃 asked Scraps。
〃Diksey Horner。 He is working in the mines； just
now； but he'll be home before long。 Suppose we
wait and talk with him about it？ Maybe he'll be
willing to explain his joke to the Hoppers。〃
〃All right；〃 said Scraps。 〃I'll wait； if Diksey
isn't too long。〃
〃No； he's short； he's shorter than I am。 Ha；
ha； ha！ Say！ that's a better joke than Diksey's。
He won't be too long； because he's short。 Hee；
hee； ho！〃
The other Horners who were standing by roared
with laughter and seemed to like their Chief's
joke as much as he did。 Scraps thought it was odd
that they could be so easily amused； but decided
there could be little harm in people who laughed
so merrily。
Chapter Twenty…Three
Peace Is Declared
〃Come with me to my dwelling and I'll introduce
you to my daughters；〃 said the Chief。 〃We're
bringing them up according to a book of rules that
was written by one of our leading old bachelors；
and everyone says they're a remarkable lot of girls。〃
So Scraps accompanied him along the street to a
house that seemed on the outside exceptionally
grimy and dingy。 The streets of this city were not
paved nor had any attempt been made to beautify
the houses or their surroundings； and having
noticed this condition Scraps was astonished when
the Chief ushered her into his home。
Here was nothing grimy or faded； indeed。 On the
contrary； the room was of dazzling brilliance and
beauty； for it was lined throughout with an
exquisite metal that resembled translucent frosted
silver。 The surface of this metal was highly
ornamented in raised designs representing men；
animals； flowers and trees； and from the metal
itself was radiated the soft light which flooded
the room。 All the furniture was made of the same
glorious metal； and Scraps asked what it was。
〃That's radium；〃 answered the Chief。 〃We
Horners spend all our time digging radium from
the mines under this mountain； and we use it
to decorate our homes and make them pretty and
cosy。 It is a medicine； too； and no one can ever
be sick who lives near radium。〃
〃Have you plenty of it？〃 asked the Patchwork
Girl。
〃More than we can use。 All the houses in this
city are decorated with it； just the same as mine
is。〃
don't you use it on your streets； then；
and the outside of your houses； to make them as
pretty as they are within？〃 she inquired。
〃Outside？ Who cares for the outside of
anything？〃 asked the Chief。 〃We Horners don't live
on the outside of our homes； we live inside。 Many
people are like those stupid Hoppers； who love to
make an outside show。 I suppose you strangers
thought their city more beautiful than ours；
because you judged from appearances and they have
handsome marble houses and marble streets； but if
you entered one of their stiff dwellings you would
find it bare and uncomfortable； as all their show
is on the outside。 They have an idea that what is
not seen by others is not important； but with us
the rooms we live in are our chief delight and
care； and we pay no attention to outside show。〃
〃Seems to me；〃 said Scraps； musingly； 〃it
would be better to make it all prettyinside
and out。〃
〃Seems？ Why； you're all seams； my girl！〃 said
the Chief； and then he laughed heartily at his
latest joke and a chorus of small voices echoed
the chorus with 〃tee…hee…hee！ ha； ha！〃
Scraps turned around and found a row of
girls seated in radium chairs ranged along one
wall of the room。 There were nineteen of them；
by actual count； and they were of all sizes from
a tiny child to one almost a grown woman。 All
were neatly dressed in spotless white robes and
had brown skins； horns on their foreheads and
threecolored hair。
〃These；〃 said the Chief； 〃are my sweet
daughters。 My dears； I introduce to you Miss
Scraps Patchwork； a lady who is traveling in
foreign parts to increase her store of wisdom。〃
The nineteen Horner girls all arose and made
a polite curtsey； after which they resumed their
seats and rearranged their robes properly。
〃Why do they sit so still； and all in a row？〃
asked Scraps。
〃Because it is ladylike and proper；〃 replied the
Chief。
〃But some are just children； poor things！
Don't they ever run around and play and laugh；
and have a good time？〃
〃No； indeed；〃 said the Chief。 〃That would he
improper in young ladies； as well as in those who
will sometime become young ladies。 My daughters
are being brought up according to the rules and
regulations laid down by a leading bachelor who
has given the subject much study and is himself a
man of taste and culture。 Politeness is his great
hobby； and he claims that if a child is allowed to
do an impolite thing one cannot expect the grown
person to do anything better。〃
〃Is it impolite to romp and shout and be jolly？〃
asked Scraps。
〃Well； sometimes it is； and sometimes it isn't；〃
replied the Horner； after considering the
question。 〃By curbing such inclinations in my
daughters we keep on the safe side。 Once in a
while I make a good joke； as you have heard； and
then I permit my daughters to laugh decorously；
but they are never allowed to make a joke
themselves。〃
〃That old bachelor who made the rules ought
to be skinned alive！〃 declared Scraps； and would
have said more on the subject had not the door
opened to admit a little Horner man whom the
Chief introduced as Diksey。
〃What's up； Chief？〃 asked Diksey； winking
nineteen times at the nineteen girls； who demurely
cast down their eyes because their father was
looking。
The Chief told the man that his joke had not
been understood by the dull Hoppers； who had
become so angry that they had declared war。 So the
only way to avoid a terrible battle was to explain
the joke so they could understand it。
〃All right；〃 replied Diksey； who seemed a good…
natured man； 〃I'll go at once to the fence and
explain。 I don't want any war with the Hoppers；
for wars between nations always cause hard
feelings。〃
So the Chief and Diksey and Scraps left the
house and went back to the marble picket fence。
The Scarecrow was still stuck on the top of his
picket but had now ceased to struggle。 On the
other side of the fence were Dorothy and Ojo；
looking between the pickets； and there； also；
were the Champion and many other Hoppers。
Diksey went close to the fence and said：
〃My good Hoppers； I wish to explain that