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jane eyre(简·爱)-第2章

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to beg; and not to live here with gentlemen's children like us; and 
eat the same meals we do; and wear clothes at our mama's expense。 Now; 
I'll teach you to rummage my bookshelves: for they are mine; all the 
house belongs to me; or will do in a few years。 Go and stand by the 
door; out of the way of the mirror and the windows。' 
   I did so; not at first aware what was his intention; but when I saw 
him lift and poise the book and stand in act to hurl it; I 
instinctively started aside with a cry of alarm: not soon enough; 
however; the volume was flung; it hit me; and I fell; striking my head 
against the door and cutting it。 The cut bled; the pain was sharp: 
my terror had passed its climax; other feelings succeeded。 
   'Wicked and cruel boy!' I said。 'You are like a murderer… you are 
like a slave…driver… you are like the Roman emperors!' 
   I had read Goldsmith's History of Rome; and had formed my opinion 
of Nero; Caligula; etc。 Also I had drawn parallels in silence; which I 
never thought thus to have declared aloud。 
   'What! what!' he cried。 'Did she say that to me? Did you hear 
her; Eliza and Georgiana? Won't I tell mama? but first…' 
   He ran headlong at me: I felt him grasp my hair and my shoulder: he 
had closed with a desperate thing。 I really saw in him a tyrant; a 
murderer。 I felt a drop or two of blood from my head trickle down my 
neck; and was sensible of somewhat pungent suffering: these sensations 
for the time predominated over fear; and I received him in frantic 
sort。 I don't very well know what I did with my hands; but he called 
me 'Rat! Rat!' and bellowed out aloud。 Aid was near him: Eliza and 
Georgiana had run for Mrs。 Reed; who was gone upstairs: she now came 
upon the scene; followed by Bessie and her maid Abbot。 We were parted: 
I heard the words… 
   'Dear! dear! What a fury to fly at Master John!' 
   'Did ever anybody see such a picture of passion!' 
   Then Mrs。 Reed subjoined… 
   'Take her away to the red…room; and lock her in there。' Four 
hands were immediately laid upon me; and I was borne upstairs。 


                          CHAPTER II 

   I RESISTED all the way: a new thing for me; and a circumstance 
which greatly strengthened the bad opinion Bessie and Miss Abbot 
were disposed to entertain of me。 The fact is; I was a trifle beside 
myself; or rather out of myself; as the French would say: I was 
conscious that a moment's mutiny had already rendered me liable to 
strange penalties; and; like any other rebel slave; I felt resolved; 
in my desperation; to go all lengths。 
   'Hold her arms; Miss Abbot: she's like a mad cat。' 
   'For shame! for shame!' cried the lady's…maid。 'What shocking 
conduct; Miss Eyre; to strike a young gentleman; your benefactress's 
son! Your young master。' 
   'Master! How is he my master? Am I a servant?' 
   'No; you are less than a servant; for you do nothing for your keep。 
There; sit down; and think over your wickedness。' 
   They had got me by this time into the apartment indicated by Mrs。 
Reed; and had thrust me upon a stool: my impulse was to rise from it 
like a spring; their two pair of hands arrested me instantly。 
   'If you don't sit still; you must be tied down;' said Bessie。 'Miss 
Abbot; lend me your garters; she would break mine directly。' 
   Miss Abbot turned to divest a stout leg of the necessary 
ligature。 This preparation for bonds; and the additional ignominy it 
inferred; took a little of the excitement out of me。 
   'Don't take them off;' I cried; 'I will not stir。' 
   In guarantee whereof; I attached myself to my seat by my hands。 
   'Mind you don't;' said Bessie; and when she had ascertained that 
I was really subsiding; she loosened her hold of me; then she and Miss 
Abbot stood with folded arms; looking darkly and doubtfully on my 
face; as incredulous of my sanity。 
   'She never did so before;' at last said Bessie; turning to the 
Abigail。 
   'But it was always in her;' was the reply。 'I've told Missis 
often my opinion about the child; and Missis agreed with me。 She's 
an underhand little thing: I never saw a girl of her age with so 
much cover。' 
   Bessie answered not; but ere long; addressing me; she said… 
   'You ought to be aware; Miss; that you are under obligations to 
Mrs。 Reed: she keeps you: if she were to turn you off; you would 
have to go to the poorhouse。' 
   I had nothing to say to these words: they were not new to me: my 
very first recollections of existence included hints of the same kind。 
This reproach of my dependence had become a vague sing…song in my ear: 
very painful and crushing; but only half intelligible。 Miss Abbot 
joined in… 
   'And you ought not to think yourself on an equality with the Misses 
Reed and Master Reed; because Missis kindly allows you to be brought 
up with them。 They will have a great deal of money; and you will 
have none: it is your place to be humble; and to try to make 
yourself agreeable to them。' 
   'What we tell you is for your good;' added Bessie; in no harsh 
voice; 'you should try to be useful and pleasant; then; perhaps; you 
would have a home here; but if you become passionate and rude; 
Missis will send you away; I am sure。' 
   'Besides;' said Miss Abbot; 'God will punish her: He might strike 
her dead in the midst of her tantrums; and then where would she go? 
Come; Bessie; we will leave her: I wouldn't have her heart for 
anything。 Say your prayers; Miss Eyre; when you are by yourself; for 
if you don't repent; something bad might be permitted to come down the 
chimney and fetch you away。' 
   They went; shutting the door; and locking it behind them。 
   The red…room was a square chamber; very seldom slept in; I might 
say never; indeed; unless when a chance influx of visitors at 
Gateshead Hall rendered it necessary to turn to account all the 
accommodation it contained: yet it was one of the largest and 
stateliest chambers in the mansion。 A bed supported on massive pillars 
of mahogany; hung with curtains of deep red damask; stood out like a 
tabernacle in the centre; the two large windows; with their blinds 
always drawn down; were half shrouded in festoons and falls of similar 
drapery; the carpet was red; the table at the foot of the bed was 
covered with a crimson cloth; the walls were a soft fawn colour with a 
blush of pink in it; the wardrobe; the toilet…table; the chairs were 
of darkly polished old mahogany。 Out of these deep surrounding 
shades rose high; and glared white; the piled…up mattresses and 
pillows of the bed; spread with a snowy Marseilles counterpane。 
Scarcely less prominent was an ample cushioned easy…chair near the 
head of the bed; also white; with a footstool before it; and 
looking; as I thought; like a pale throne。 
   This room was chill; because it seldom had a fire; it was silent; 
because remote from the nursery and kitchen; solemn; because it was 
known to be so seldom entered。 The housemaid alone came here on 
Saturdays; to wipe from the mirrors and the furniture a week's quiet 
dust: and Mrs。 Reed herself; at far intervals; visited it to review 
the contents of a certain secret drawer in the wardrobe; where were 
stored divers parchments; her jewel…casket; and a miniature of her 
deceased husband; and in those last words lies the secret of the 
red…room… the spell which kept it so lonely in spite of its grandeur。 
   Mr。 Reed had been dead nine years: it was in this chamber he 
breathed his last; here he lay in state; hence his coffin was borne by 
the undertaker's men; and; since that day; a sense of dreary 
consecration had guarded it from frequent intrusion。 
   My seat; to which Bessie and the bitter Miss Abbot had left me 
riveted; was a low ottoman near the marble chimney…piece; the bed rose 
before me; to my right hand there was the high; dark wardrobe; with 
subdued; broken reflections varying the gloss of its panels; to my 
left were the muffled windows; a great looking…glass between them 
repeated the vacant majesty of the bed and room。 I was not quite 
sure whether they had locked the door; and when I dared move; I got up 
and went to see。 Alas! yes: no jail was ever more secure。 Returning; I 
had to cross before the looking…glass; my fascinated glance 
involuntarily explored the depth it revealed。 All looked colder and 
darker in that visionary hollow than in reality: and the strange 
little figure there gazing at me; with a white face and arms 
specking the gloom; and glittering eyes of fear moving where all 
else was still; had the effect of a real spirit: I thought it like one 
of the tiny phantoms; half fairy; half imp; Bessie's evening stories 
represented as coming out of lone; ferny dells in moors; and appearing 
before the eyes of belated travellers。 I returned to my stool。 
   Superstition was with me at that moment; but it was not yet her 
hour for complete victory: my blood was still warm; the mood of the 
revolted slave was still bracing me with its bitter vigour; I had to 
stem a rapid rush of retrospective thought before I quailed to the 
dismal present。 
   All John Reed's violent tyrannies; all his sisters' proud 
indifference; all his mother'
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