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〃No ceremony！〃 I replied。 She adjusted her head…gear； and I
helped her。 She thanked me； and ascended the steps。
MAY 17。
I have made all sorts of acquaintances； but have as yet found no
society。 I know not what attraction I possess for the people； so
many of them like me； and attach themselves to me； and then I feel
sorry when the road we pursue together goes only a short distance。
If you inquire what the people are like here； I must answer； 〃The
same as everywhere。〃 The human race is but a monotonous affair。
Most of them labour the greater part of their time for mere
subsistence； and the scanty portion of freedom which remains to
them so troubles them that they use every exertion to get rid of
it。 Oh； the destiny of man！
But they are a right good sort of people。 If I occasionally forget
myself； and take part in the innocent pleasures which are not yet
forbidden to the peasantry； and enjoy myself； for instance； with
genuine freedom and sincerity； round a well…covered table； or
arrange an excursion or a dance opportunely； and so forth； all
this produces a good effect upon my disposition； only I must forget
that there lie dormant within me so many other qualities which
moulder uselessly； and which I am obliged to keep carefully concealed。
Ah！ this thought affects my spirits fearfully。 And yet to be
misunderstood is the fate of the like of us。
Alas； that the friend of my youth is gone！ Alas； that I ever knew
her！ I might say to myself； 〃You are a dreamer to seek what is
not to be found here below。〃 But she has been mine。 I have
possessed that heart； that noble soul； in whose presence I seemed
to be more than I really was； because I was all that I could be。
Good heavens！ did then a single power of my soul remain unexercised？
In her presence could I not display； to its full extent； that
mysterious feeling with which my heart embraces nature？ Was not
our intercourse a perpetual web of the finest emotions； of the
keenest wit； the varieties of which； even in their very eccentricity；
bore the stamp of genius？ Alas！ the few years by which she was
my senior brought her to the grave before me。 Never can I forget
her firm mind or her heavenly patience。
A few days ago I met a certain young V； a frank； open fellow；
with a most pleasing countenance。 He has just left the university；
does not deem himself overwise； but believes he knows more than
other people。 He has worked hard； as I can perceive from many
circumstances； and； in short； possesses a large stock of information。
When he heard that I am drawing a good deal； and that I know Greek
（two wonderful things for this part of the country）； he came to
see me； and displayed his whole store of learning； from Batteaux
to Wood； from De Piles to Winkelmann： he assured me he had read
through the first part of Sultzer's theory； and also possessed a
manuscript of Heyne's work on the study of the antique。 I allowed
it all to pass。
I have become acquainted； also； with a very worthy person； the
district judge； a frank and open…hearted man。 I am told it is a
most delightful thing to see him in the midst of his children； of
whom he has nine。 His eldest daughter especially is highly spoken
of。 He has invited me to go and see him； and I intend to do so
on the first opportunity。 He lives at one of the royal hunting…lodges；
which can be reached from here in an hour and a half by walking；
and which he obtained leave to inhabit after the loss of his wife；
as it is so painful to him to reside in town and at the court。
There have also come in my way a few other originals of a questionable
sort； who are in all respects undesirable； and most intolerable
in their demonstration of friendship。 Good…bye。 This letter will
please you： it is quite historical。
MAY 22。
That the life of man is but a dream； many a man has surmised
heretofore； and I； too； am everywhere pursued by this feeling。
When I consider the narrow limits within which our active and
inquiring faculties are confined； when I see how all our energies
are wasted in providing for mere necessities； which again have no
further end than to prolong a wretched existence； and then that
all our satisfaction concerning certain subjects of investigation
ends in nothing better than a passive resignation； whilst we amuse
ourselves painting our prison…walls with bright figures and brilliant
landscapes； when I consider all this； Wilhelm； I am silent。
I examine my own being； and find there a world； but a world rather
of imagination and dim desires； than of distinctness and living
power。 Then everything swims before my senses； and I smile and
dream while pursuing my way through the world。
All learned professors and doctors are agreed that children do not
comprehend the cause of their desires； but that the grown…up should
wander about this earth like children； without knowing whence they
come； or whither they go； influenced as little by fixed motives；
but guided like them by biscuits； sugar…plums； and the rod； this
is what nobody is willing to acknowledge； and yet I think it is
palpable。
I know what you will say in reply； for I am ready to admit that
they are happiest； who； like children； amuse themselves with their
playthings； dress and undress their dolls； and attentively watch
the cupboard； where mamma has locked up her sweet things； and；
when at last they get a delicious morsel； eat it greedily； and
exclaim； 〃More！〃 These are certainly happy beings； but others
also are objects of envy； who dignify their paltry employments；
and sometimes even their passions； with pompous titles； representing
them to mankind as gigantic achievements performed for their welfare
and glory。 But the man who humbly acknowledges the vanity of all
this； who observes with what pleasure the thriving citizen converts
his little garden into a paradise； and how patiently even the poor
man pursues his weary way under his burden； and how all wish equally
to behold the light of the sun a little longer； yes； such a man
is at peace； and creates his own world within himself； and he is
also happy； because he is a man。 And then； however limited his
sphere； he still preserves in his bosom the sweet feeling of liberty；
and knows that he can quit his prison whenever he likes。
MAY 26。
You know of old my ways of settling anywhere； of selecting a little
cottage in some cosy spot； and of putting up in it with every
inconvenience。 Here； too； I have discovered such a snug； comfortable
place； which possesses peculiar charms for me。
About a league from the town is a place called Walheim。 （The reader
need not take the trouble to look for the place thus designated。
We have found it necessary to change the names given in the original。）
It is delightfully situated on the side of a hill； and； by proceeding
along one of the footpaths which lead out of the village； you can
have a view of the whole valley。 A good old woman lives there；
who keeps a small inn。 She sells wine； beer； and coffee； and is
cheerful and pleasant notwithstanding her age。 The chief charm
of this spot consists in two linden…trees； spreading their enormous
branches over the little green before the church； which is entirely
surrounded by peasants' cottages； barns； and homesteads。 I have
seldom seen a place so retired and peaceable； and there often have
my table and chair brought out from the little inn； and drink my
coffee there； and read my Homer。 Accident brought me to the spot
one fine afternoon； and I found it perfectly deserted。 Everybody
was in the fields except a little boy about four years of age； who
was sitting on the ground； and held between his knees a child about
six months old： he pressed it to his bosom with both arms； which
thus formed a sort of arm…chair； and； notwithstanding the liveliness
which sparkled in its black eyes； it remained perfectly still。
The sight charmed me。 I sat down upon a plough opposite； and
sketched with great delight this little picture of brotherly
tenderness。 I added the neighbouring hedge； the barn…door； and
some broken cart…wheels； just as they happened to lie； and I found
in about an hour that I had made a very correct and interesting
drawing； without putting in the slightest thing of my own。 This
confirmed me in my resolution of adhering； for the future； entirely
to nature。 She alone is inexhaustible； and capable of forming the
greatest masters。 Much may be alleged in favour of rules； as much
may be likewise advanced in favour of the laws of society： an
artist formed upon them will never produce anything absolutely bad
or disgusting； as a man who observes the laws； and obeys decorum；
can never be an absolutely intolerable neighbour； nor a decided
villain： but yet； say what you will of rules； they destroy the
genuine feeling of nature； as well as its true expression。 Do not
tell me 〃that this is too hard； that they only restrain and prune
superfluous branches； etc。〃 My good friend； I will illustrate
this by an analogy。 These things resemble love。 A warmhearted
youth becomes strongly attached to a maiden： he spends every hour
of the day in her company； wears out his health； and lavishes his
fortune； to affo