按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
and re…read with an untiring； unending assiduity。 There； he
was convinced； all truth was to be found； and he was equally
convinced that he could find it。 The doubts of philosophers； the
investigations of commentators； the smiles of men of the world；
the dogmas of Churches such things meant nothing to the
Colonel。
Two facts alone were evident： there was the Bible； and there was
himself； and all that remained to be done was for him to discover
what were the Bible's instructions； and to act accordingly。 In
order to make this discovery it was only necessary for him to
read the Bible over and over again； and therefore； for the rest
of his life； he did so。
The faith that he evolved was mystical and fatalistic； it was
also highly unconventional。 His creed； based upon the narrow
foundations of Jewish Scripture； eked out occasionally by some
English evangelical manual； was yet wide enough to ignore every
doctrinal difference； and even； at moments； to transcend the
bounds of Christianity itself。 The just man was he who submitted
to the Will of God； and the Will of God； inscrutable and
absolute； could be served aright only by those who turned away
from earthly desires and temporal temptations； to rest themselves
whole…heartedly upon the in…dwelling Spirit。 Human beings were
the transitory embodiments of souls who had existed through an
infinite past； and would continue to exist through an infinite
future。
The world was vanity； the flesh was dust and ashes。 'A man；'
Gordon
wrote to his sister； 'who knows not the secret； who has not the
in…dwelling
of God revealed to him； is like this＇picture of a circle with
Body and
Soul written within it＇。 He takes the promises and curses as
addressed
to him as one man； and will not hear of there being any birth
before his
natural birth； in any existence except with the body he is in。
The man to
whom the secret （the indwelling of God） is revealed is like this：
＇picture
of a circle with soul and body enclosed in two separate circles＇。
He applies the promises to one and the curses to the other； if
disobedient； which he must be； except the soul is enabled by God
to rule。 He then sees he is not of this world； for when he speaks
of himself he quite disregards the body his soul lives in； which
is earthly。' Such conceptions are familiar enough in the history
of religious thought： they are those of the hermit and the fakir；
and it might have been expected that； when once they had taken
hold upon his mind； Gordon would have been content to lay aside
the activities of his profession； and would have relapsed at last
into the complete retirement of holy meditation。 But there were
other elements in his nature which urged him towards a very
different course。 He was no simple quietist。 He was an English
gentleman； an officer； a man of energy and action； a lover of
danger and the audacities that defeat danger； a passionate
creature； flowing over with the self…assertiveness of independent
judgment and the arbitrary temper of command。
Whatever he might find in his pocket…Bible； it was not for such
as
he to dream out his days in devout obscurity。 But； conveniently
enough；
he found nothing in his pocket…Bible indicating that he should。
What
he did find was that the Will of God was inscrutable and
absolute；
that it was man's duty to follow where God's hand led； and； if
God's hand led towards violent excitements and extraordinary
vicissitudes； that it was not only futile； it was impious to
turn another way。 Fatalism is always apt to be a double…edged
philosophy； for while； on the one hand； it reveals the minutest
occurrences as the immutable result of a rigid chain of
infinitely predestined causes； on the other； it invests the
wildest incoherences of conduct or of circumstance with the
sanctity of eternal law。 And Gordon's fatalism was no exception。
The same doctrine that led him to dally with omens； to search for
prophetic texts； and to append； in brackets； the apotropaic
initials D。V。 after every statement in his letters implying
futurity； led him also to envisage his moods and his desires； his
passing reckless whims and his deep unconscious instincts； as the
mysterious manifestations of the indwelling God。 That there was
danger lurking in such a creed he was very well aware。 The
grosser temptations of the world money and the vulgar
attributes
of power had； indeed； no charms for him； but there were subtler
and more insinuating allurements which it was not so easy to
resist。 More than one observer declared that ambition was； in
reality； the essential motive in his life： ambition； neither for
wealth nor titles； but for fame and influence； for the swaying of
multitudes； and for that kind of enlarged and intensified
existence 'where breath breathes most even in the mouths of men'。
Was it so？ In the depths of Gordon's soul there were intertwining
contradictions intricate recesses where egoism and renunciation
melted into one another； where the flesh lost itself in the
spirit； and the spirit in the flesh。 What was the Will of God？
The question； which first became insistent during his retirement
at Gravesend； never afterwards left him； it might almost be said
that he spent the remainder of his life in searching for the
answer to it。 In all his Odysseys； in all his strange and
agitated adventures； a day never passed on which he neglected the
voice of eternal wisdom as it spoke through the words of Paul or
Solomon； of Jonah or Habakkuk。 He opened his Bible； he read； and
then he noted down his reflections upon scraps of paper； which；
periodically pinned together； he dispatched to one or other of
his religious friends； and particularly his sister Augusta。 The
published extracts from these voluminous outpourings lay bare the
inner history of Gordon's spirit； and reveal the pious visionary
of Gravesend in the restless hero of three continents。
His seclusion came to an end in a distinctly providential manner。
In accordance with a stipulation in the Treaty of Paris； an
international commission had been appointed to improve the
navigation of the Danube； and Gordon； who had acted on a similar
body fifteen years earlier； was sent out to represent Great
Britain。 At Constantinople； he chanced to meet the Egyptian
minister； Nubar Pasha。 The Governorship of the Equatorial
Provinces of the Sudan was about to fall vacant； and Nubar
offered the post to Gordon； who accepted it。 'For some wise
design；' he wrote to his sister； 'God turns events one way or
another； whether man likes it or not； as a man driving a horse
turns it to right or left without consideration as to whether the
horse likes that way or not。 To be happy； a man must be like a
well…broken； willing horse； ready for anything。 Events will go as
God likes。'
And then followed six years of extraordinary； desperate；
unceasing； and ungrateful labour。 The unexplored and pestilential
region of Equatoria； stretching southwards to the Great Lakes and
the sources of the Nile； had been annexed to Egypt by the Khedive
Ismail； who； while he squandered his millions on Parisian ballet…
dancers； dreamt strange dreams of glory and empire。 Those dim
tracts of swamp and forest in Central Africa were so he
declared to be 'opened up'； they were to receive the blessings
of civilisation； they were to become a source of eternal honour
to himself and Egypt。 The slave…trade； which flourished there；
was to be put down； the savage inhabitants were to become
acquainted with freedom； justice； and prosperity。 Incidentally； a
government monopoly in ivory was to be established； and the place
was to be made a paying concern。 Ismail； hopelessly in debt to a
horde of European creditors； looked to Europe to support him in
his schemes。 Europe； and； in particular； England； with her
passion for extraneous philanthropy； was not averse。
Sir Samuel Baker became the first Governor of Equatoria； and now
Gordon was to carry on the good work。 In such circumstances it
was
only natural that Gordon should consider himself a special
instrument
in God's band。 To put his disinterestedness beyond doubt； he
reduced his salary； which had been fixed at ￡10；000； to ￡2；000。
He
took over his new duties early in 1874； and it was not long
before he had a first hint of disillusionment。 On his way up the
Nile； he was received in state at Khartoum by the Egyptian
Governor General of the Sudan； his immediate official superior。
The function ended in a prolonged banquet； followed by a mixed
ballet of soldiers and completely naked young women； who danced
in a circle； beat time with their feet； and accompanied their
gestures with a curious sound of clucking。 At last the Austrian