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that fatal battle of Cardigan； where the Welsh defeated some of
king Stephen's best troops； and where many a good suit of mine
unpaid for； fell to the ground。
〃The gentlemen of this honorable calling have fared much better
in later ages than when I was of it； for now it seems the fashion
is； when they apprehend their customer is not in the best
circumstances； if they are not paid as soon as they carry home
the suit； they charge him in their book as much again as it is
worth； and then send a gentleman with a small scrip of parchment
to demand the money。 If this be not immediately paid the
gentleman takes the beau with him to his house； where he locks
him up till the tailor is contented： but in my time these scrips
of parchment were not in use； and if the beau disliked paying for
his clothes； as very often happened； we had no method of
compelling him。
〃In several of the characters which I have related to you； I
apprehend I have sometimes forgot myself； and considered myself
as really interested as I was when I personated them on earth。 I
have just now caught myself in the fact； for I have complained to
you as bitterly of my customers as I formerly used to do when I
was the tailor： but in reality； though there were some few
persons of very great quality； and some others； who never paid
their debts； yet those were but a few； and I had a method of
repairing this loss。 My customers I divided under three heads：
those who paid ready money； those who paid slow； and those who
never paid at all。 The first of these I considered apart by
themselves； as persons by whom I got a certain but small profit。
The two last I lumped together； making those who paid slow
contribute to repair my losses by those who did not pay at all。
Thus； upon the whole； I was a very inconsiderable loser； and
might have left a fortune to my family； had I not launched forth
into expenses which swallowed up all my gains。 I had a wife and
two children。 These indeed I kept frugally enough； for I half
starved them； but I kept a mistress in a finer way； for whom I
had a country…house； pleasantly situated on the Thames； elegantly
fitted up and neatly furnished。 This woman might very properly
be called my mistress； for she was most absolutely so； and though
her tenure was no higher than by my will； she domineered as
tyrannically as if my chains had been riveted in the strongest
manner。 To all this I submitted； not through any adoration of
her beauty； which was indeed but indifferent。 Her charms
consisted in little wantonnesses； which she knew admirably well
to use in hours of dalliance； and which； I believe； are of all
things the most delightful to a lover。
〃She was so profusely extravagant； that it seemed as if she had
an actual intent to ruin me。 This I am sure of； if such had been
her real intention； she could have taken no properer way to
accomplish it； nay； I myself might appear to have had the same
view： for； besides this extravagant mistress and my
country…house； I kept likewise a brace of hunters； rather for
that it was fashionable so to do than for any great delight I
took in the sport； which I very little attended； not for want of
leisure； for few noblemen had so much。 All the work I ever did
was taking measure； and that only of my greatest and best
customers。 I scare ever cut a piece of cloth in my life； nor was
indeed much more able to fashion a coat than any gentleman in the
kingdom。 This made a skillful servant too necessary to me。 He
knew I must submit to any terms with； or any treatment from； him。
He knew it was easier for him to find another such a tailor as me
than for me to procure such another workman as him： for this
reason he exerted the most notorious and cruel tyranny； seldom
giving me a civil word； nor could the utmost condescension on my
side； though attended with continual presents and rewards； and
raising his wages； content or please him。 In a word； he was as
absolutely my master as was ever an ambitious； industrious prime
minister over an indolent and voluptuous king。 All my other
journeymen paid more respect to him than to me； for they
considered my favor as a necessary consequence of obtaining his。
〃These were the most remarkable occurrences while I acted this
part。 Minos hesitated a few moments； and then bid me get back
again； without assigning any reason。〃
CHAPTER XXIII
The life of alderman Julian。
〃I now revisited England； and was born at London。 My father was
one of the magistrates of that city。 He had eleven children； of
whom I was the eldest。 He had great success in trade； and grew
extremely rich； but the largeness of his family rendered it
impossible for him to leave me a fortune sufficient to live well
on independent of business。 I was accordingly brought up to be a
fishmonger； in which capacity I myself afterwards acquired very
considerable wealth。
〃The same disposition of mind which in princes is called ambition
is in subjects named faction。 To this temper I was greatly
addicted from my youth。 I was； while a boy； a great partisan of
prince John's against his brother Richard； during the latter's
absence in the holy war and in his captivity。 I was no more than
one…and…twenty when I first began to make political speeches in
public； and to endeavor to foment disquietude and discontent in
the city。 As I was pretty well qualified for this office； by a
great fluency of words； an harmonious accent； a graceful
delivery； and above all an invincible assurance； I had soon
acquired some reputation among the younger citizens； and some of
the weaker and more inconsiderate of a riper age。 This；
co…operating with my own natural vanity； made me extravagantly
proud and supercilious。 I soon began to esteem myself a man of
some consequence； and to overlook persons every way my superiors。
〃The famous Robin Hood； and his companion Little John； at this
time made a considerable figure in Yorkshire。 I took upon me to
write a letter to the former； in the name of the city； inviting
him to come to London； where I assured him of very good
reception； signifying to him my own great weight and consequence；
and how much I had disposed the citizens in his favor。 Whether
he received this letter or no I am not certain； but he never gave
me any answer to it。
〃A little afterwards one William Fitz…Osborn； or； as he was
nicknamed； William Long…Beard； began to make a figure in the
city。 He was a bold and an impudent fellow； and had raised
himself to great popularity with the rabble； by pretending to
espouse their cause against the rich。 I took this man's part；
and made a public oration in his favor； setting him forth as a
patriot； and one who had embarked in the cause of liberty： for
which service he did not receive me with the acknowledgments I
expected。 However； as I thought I should easily gain the
ascendant over this fellow； I continued still firm on his side；
till the archbishop of Canterbury； with an armed force； put an
end to his progress： for he was seized in Bowchurch； where he
had taken refuge； and with nine of his accomplices hanged in
chains。
〃I escaped narrowly myself； for I was seized in the same church
with the rest； and； as I had been very considerably engaged in
the enterprise； the archbishop was inclined to make me an
example； but my father's merit； who had advanced a considerable
sum to queen Eleanor towards the king's ransom； preserved me。
〃The consternation my danger had occasioned kept me some time
quiet； and I applied myself very assiduously to my trade。 I
invented all manner of methods to enhance the price of fish； and
made use of my utmost endeavors to engross as much of the
business as possible in my own hands。 By these means I acquired
a substance which raised me to some little consequence in the
city； but far from elevating me to that degree which I had
formerly flattered myself with possessing at a time when I was
totally insignificant； for； in a trading society； money must at
least lay the foundation of all power and interest。
〃But as it hath been remarked that the same ambition which sent
Alexander into Asia brings the wrestler on the green； and as this
same ambition is as incapable as quicksilver of lying still； so
I； who was possessed perhaps of a share equal to what hath fired
the blood of any of the heroes of antiquity； was no less restless
and discontented with ease and quiet。 My first endeavors were to
make myself head of my company； which Richard I had just
published； and soon afterwards I procured myself to be chosen
alderman。
〃Opposition is the only state which can give a subject an
opportunity of exerting the disposition I was possessed of。
Accordingly； king John was no sooner seated on his throne than I
began to oppose his measures； whether right or wrong。 It is true
that monarch had faults enow。 He was