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〃Oh！ Richard； oh my king！
All the world abandons thee！
Broum！ broum！ broum！ broum！ broum！
The same old story everywhere；
A roving heart and a 。 。 。 tra la la。〃
〃Gentlemen！〃 shouted Christophe； 〃the soup is ready； and every
one is waiting for you。〃
〃Here；〃 Vautrin called down to him； 〃come and take a bottle of my
Bordeaux。〃
〃Do you think your watch is pretty？〃 asked Goriot。 〃She has good
taste； hasn't she？ Eh？〃
Vautrin； Father Goriot； and Rastignac came downstairs in company；
and； all three of them being late； were obliged to sit together。
Eugene was as distant as possible in his manner to Vautrin during
dinner； but the other； so charming in Mme。 Vauquer's opinion； had
never been so witty。 His lively sallies and sparkling talk put
the whole table in good humor。 His assurance and coolness filled
Eugene with consternation。
〃Why； what has come to you to…day？〃 inquired Mme。 Vauquer。 〃You
are as merry as a skylark。〃
〃I am always in spirits after I have made a good bargain。〃
〃Bargain？〃 said Eugene。
〃Well； yes； bargain。 I have just delivered a lot of goods； and I
shall be paid a handsome commission on themMlle。 Michonneau；〃
he went on； seeing that the elderly spinster was scrutinizing him
intently； 〃have you any objection to some feature in my face；
that you are making those lynx eyes at me？ Just let me know； and
I will have it changed to oblige you 。 。 。 We shall not fall out
about it； Poiret； I dare say？〃 he added； winking at the
superannuated clerk。
〃Bless my soul； you ought to stand as model for a burlesque
Hercules；〃 said the young painter。
〃I will； upon my word！ if Mlle。 Michonneau will consent to sit as
the Venus of Pere…Lachaise；〃 replied Vautrin。
〃There's Poiret；〃 suggested Bianchon。
〃Oh！ Poiret shall pose as Poiret。 He can be a garden god！〃 cried
Vautrin； 〃his name means a pear〃
〃A sleepy pear！〃 Bianchon put in。 〃You will come in between the
pear and the cheese。〃
〃What stuff are you all talking！〃 said Mme。 Vauquer； 〃you would
do better to treat us to your Bordeaux； I see a glimpse of a
bottle there。 It would keep us all in a good humor； and it is
good for the stomach besides。〃
〃Gentlemen；〃 said Vautrin； 〃the Lady President calls us to order。
Mme。 Couture and Mlle。 Victorine will take your jokes in good
part； but respect the innocence of the aged Goriot。 I propose a
glass or two of Bordeauxrama； rendered twice illustrious by the
name of Laffite； no political allusions intended。Come； you
Turk！〃 he added； looking at Christophe； who did not offer to
stir。 〃Christophe！ Here！ What； you don't answer to your own name？
Bring us some liquor； Turk！〃
〃Here it is； sir；〃 said Christophe； holding out the bottle。
Vautrin filled Eugene's glass and Goriot's likewise； then he
deliberately poured out a few drops into his own glass； and
sipped it while his two neighbors drank their wine。 All at once
he made a grimace。
〃Corked！〃 he cried。 〃The devil！ You can drink the rest of this；
Christophe； and go and find another bottle； take from the right…
hand side； you know。 There are sixteen of us； take down eight
bottles。〃
〃If you are going to stand treat；〃 said the painter； 〃I will pay
for a hundred chestnuts。〃
〃Oh！ oh！〃
〃Booououh！〃
〃Prrr！〃
These exclamations came from all parts of the table like squibs
from a set firework。
〃Come； now； Mama Vauquer； a couple of bottles of champagne；〃
called Vautrin。
〃Quien！ just like you！ Why not ask for the whole house at once。 A
couple of bottles of champagne； that means twelve francs！ I shall
never see the money back again； I know！ But if M。 Eugene has a
mind to pay for it； I have some currant cordial。〃
〃That currant cordial of hers is as bad as a black draught；〃
muttered the medical student。
〃Shut up； Bianchon；〃 exclaimed Rastignac； 〃the very mention of
black draught makes me feel。 Yes； champagne； by all means； I
will pay for it；〃 he added。
〃Sylvie；〃 called Mme。 Vauquer； 〃bring in some biscuits； and the
little cakes。〃
〃Those little cakes are mouldy graybeards；〃 said Vautrin。 〃But
trot out the biscuits。〃
The Bordeaux wine circulated； the dinner table became a livelier
scene than ever； and the fun grew fast and furious。 Imitations of
the cries of various animals mingled with the loud laughter； the
Museum official having taken it into his head to mimic a cat…call
rather like the caterwauling of the animal in question； eight
voices simultaneously struck up with the following variations：
〃Scissors to grind！〃
〃Chick…weeds for singing bir…ds！〃
〃Brandy…snaps； ladies！〃
〃China to mend！〃
〃Boat ahoy！〃
〃Sticks to beat your wives or your clothes！〃
〃Old clo'！〃
〃Cherries all ripe！〃
But the palm was awarded to Bianchon for the nasal accent with
which he rendered the cry of 〃Umbrellas to me…end！〃
A few seconds later； and there was a head…splitting racket in the
room； a storm of tomfoolery； a sort of cats' concert； with
Vautrin as conductor of the orchestra； the latter keeping an eye
the while on Eugene and Father Goriot。 The wine seemed to have
gone to their heads already。 They leaned back in their chairs；
looking at the general confusion with an air of gravity； and
drank but little； both of them were absorbed in the thought of
what lay before them to do that evening； and yet neither of them
felt able to rise and go。 Vautrin gave a side glance at them from
time to time； and watched the change that came over their faces；
choosing the moment when their eyes drooped and seemed about to
close； to bend over Rastignac and to say in his ear：
〃My little lad； you are not quite shrewd enough to outwit Papa
Vautrin yet； and he is too fond of you to let you make a mess of
your affairs。 When I have made up my mind to do a thing； no one
short of Providence can put me off。 Aha！ we were for going round
to warn old Taillefer； telling tales out of school！ The oven is
hot； the dough is kneaded； the bread is ready for the oven； to…
morrow we will eat it up and whisk away the crumbs； and we are
not going to spoil the baking？ 。 。 。 No； no； it is all as good as
done！ We may suffer from a few conscientious scruples； but they
will be digested along with the bread。 While we are having our
forty winks； Colonel Count Franchessini will clear the way to
Michel Taillefer's inheritance with the point of his sword。
Victorine will come in for her brother's money； a snug fifteen
thousand francs a year。 I have made inquiries already； and I know
that her late mother's property amounts to more than three
hundred thousand〃
Eugene heard all this； and could not answer a word； his tongue
seemed to be glued to the roof of his mouth； an irresistible
drowsiness was creeping over him。 He still saw the table and the
faces round it； but it was through a bright mist。 Soon the noise
began to subside； one by one the boarders went。 At last； when
their numbers had so dwindled that the party consisted of Mme。
Vauquer； Mme。 Couture； Mlle。 Victorine； Vautrin； and Father
Goriot； Rastignac watched as though in a dream how Mme。 Vauquer
busied herself by collecting the bottles； and drained the
remainder of the wine out of each to fill others。
〃Oh！ how uproarious they are！ what a thing it is to be young！〃
said the widow。
These were the last words that Eugene heard and understood。
〃There is no one like M。 Vautrin for a bit of fun like this；〃
said Sylvie。 〃There； just hark at Christophe； he is snoring like
a top。〃
〃Good…bye； mamma；〃 said Vautrin； 〃I am going to a theatre on the
boulevard to see M。 Marty in Le Mont Sauvage； a fine play taken
from Le Solitaire。 。 。 。 If you like； I will take you and these
two ladies〃
〃Thank you； I must decline；〃 said Mme。 Couture。
〃What！ my good lady！〃 cried Mme。 Vauquer； 〃decline to see a play
founded on the Le Solitaire； a work by Atala de Chateaubriand？ We
were so fond of that book that we cried over it like Magdalens
under the line…trees last summer； and then it is an improving
work that might edify your young lady。〃
〃We are forbidden to go to the play；〃 answered Victorine。
〃Just look； those two yonder have dropped off where they sit；〃
said Vautrin； shaking the heads of the two sleepers in a comical
way。
He altered the sleeping student's position； settled his head more
comfortably on the back of his chair； kissed him warmly on the
forehead； and began to sing：
〃Sleep； little darlings；
I watch while you slumber。〃
〃I am afraid he may be ill；〃 said Victorine。
〃Then stop and take care of him；〃 returned Vautrin。 〃 'Tis your
duty as a meek and obedient wife；〃 he whispered in her ear。 〃the
young fellow worships you； and you will be his little wife
there's your fortune for you。 In short；〃 he added aloud； 〃they
lived happily ever afterwards； were much l