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H。 And yet you have no hope of ever being his？ And yet you accuse me of being romantic in my sentiments。
S。 I have indeed long ceased to hope； but yet I sometimes hope against hope。
H。 My love！ were it in my power； thy hopes should be fulfilled to…morrow。 Next to my own； there is nothing that could give me so much satisfaction as to see thine realized！ Do I not love thee； when I can feel such an interest in thy love for another？ It was that which first wedded my very soul to you。 I would give worlds for a share in a heart so rich in pure affection！
S。 And yet I did not tell you of the circumstance to raise myself in your opinion。
H。 You are a sublime little thing！ And yet； as you have no prospects there； I cannot help thinking； the best thing would be to do as I have said。
S。 I would never marry a man I did not love beyond all the world。
H。 I should be satisfied with less than thatwith the love； or regard； or whatever you call it； you have shown me before marriage； if that has only been sincere。 You would hardly like me less afterwards。
S。 Endearments would； I should think； increase regard； where there was love beforehand； but that is not exactly my case。
H。 But I think you would be happier than you are at present。 You take pleasure in my conversation； and you say you have an esteem for me； and it is upon this； after the honeymoon； that marriage chiefly turns。
S。 Do you think there is no pleasure in a single life？
H。 Do you mean on account of its liberty？
S。 No； but I feel that forced duty is no duty。 I have high ideas of the married state！
H。 Higher than of the maiden state？
S。 I understand you； Sir。
H。 I meant nothing； but you have sometimes spoken of any serious attachment as a tie upon you。 It is not that you prefer flirting with 〃gay young men〃 to becoming a mere dull domestic wife？
S。 You have no right to throw out such insinuations： for though I am but a tradesman's daughter； I have as nice a sense of honour as anyone can have。
H。 Talk of a tradesman's daughter！ you would ennoble any family； thou glorious girl； by true nobility of mind。
S。 Oh！ Sir； you flatter me。 I know my own inferiority to most。
H。 To none； there is no one above thee； man nor woman either。 You are above your situation； which is not fit for you。
S。 I am contented with my lot； and do my duty as cheerfully as I can。
H。 Have you not told me your spirits grow worse every year？
S。 Not on that account： but some disappointments are hard to bear up against。
H。 If you talk about that； you'll unman me。 But tell me； my love；I have thought of it as something that might account for some circumstances； that is； as a mere possibility。 But tell me； there was not a likeness between me and your old lover that struck you at first sight？ Was there？
S。 No； Sir； none。
H。 Well； I didn't think it likely there should。
S。 But there was a likeness。
H。 To whom？
S。 To that little image！ （looking intently on a small bronze figure of Buonaparte on the mantelpiece）。
H。 What； do you mean to Buonaparte？
S。 Yes； all but the nose was just like。
H。 And was his figure the same？
S。 He was taller！
＇I got up and gave her the image； and told her it was hers by every right that was sacred。 She refused at first to take so valuable a curiosity； and said she would keep it for me。 But I pressed it eagerly； and she look it。 She immediately came and sat down； and put her arm round my neck； and kissed me； and I said； 〃Is it not plain we are the best friends in the world； since we are always so glad to make it up？〃 And then I added 〃How odd it was that the God of my idolatry should turn out to be like her Idol； and said it was no wonder that the same face which awed the world should conquer the sweetest creature in it！〃 How I loved her at that moment！ Is it possible that the wretch who writes this could ever have been so blest！ Heavenly delicious creature！ Can I live without her？ Oh！ nonevernever。
〃What is this world？ What asken men to have； Now with his love； now in the cold grave； Alone； withouten any compagnie！〃
Let me but see her again！ She cannot hate the man who loves her as I do。＇
LETTERS TO THE SAME
Feb。； I822。
You will scold me for this； and ask me if this is keeping my promise to mind my work。 One half of it was to think of Sarah： and besides； I do not neglect my work either； I assure you。 I regularly do ten pages a day； which mounts up to thirty guineas' worth a week； so that you see I should grow rich at this rate； if I could keep on so； AND I COULD KEEP ON SO； if I had you with me to encourage me with your sweet smiles； and share my lot。 The Berwick smacks sail twice a week； and the wind sits fair。 When I think of the thousand endearing caresses that have passed between us； I do not wonder at the strong attachment that draws me to you； but I am sorry for my own want of power to please。 I hear the wind sigh through the lattice； and keep repeating over and over to myself two lines of Lord Byron's Tragedy
〃So shalt thou find me ever at thy side Here and hereafter； if the last may be。〃
applying them to thee； my love； and thinking whether I shall ever see thee again。 Perhaps notfor some years at leasttill both thou and I are oldand then； when all else have forsaken thee； I will creep to thee； and die in thine arms。 You once made me believe I was not hated by her I loved； and for that sensation； so delicious was it； though but a mockery and a dream； I owe you more than I can ever pay。 I thought to have dried up my tears for ever； the day I left you； but as I write this； they stream again。 If they did not； I think my heart would burst。 I walk out here of an afternoon； and hear the notes of the thrush； that come up from a sheltered valley below； welcome in the spring； but they do not melt my heart as they used： it is grown cold and dead。 As you say； it will one day be colder。Forgive what I have written above； I did not intend it： but you were once my little all； and I cannot bear the thought of having lost you for ever； I fear through my own fault。 Has any one called？ Do not send any letters that come。 I should like you and your mother （if agreeable） to go and see Mr。 Kean in Othello； and Miss Stephens in Love in a Village。 If you will； I will write to Mr。 T； to send you tickets。 Has Mr。 P called？ I think I must send to him for the picture to kiss and talk to。 Kiss me； my best beloved。 Ah！ if you can never be mine； still let me be your proud and happy slave。
H。
TO THE SAME
March； I822。
You will be glad to learn I have done my worka volume in less than a month。 This is one reason why I am better than when I came； and another is； I have had two letters from Sarah。 I am pleased I have got through this job； as I was afraid I might lose reputation by it （which I can little afford to lose）and besides； I am more anxious to do well now； as I wish you to hear me well spoken of。 I walk out of an afternoon； and hear the birds sing as I told you； and think； if I had you hanging on my arm； and that for life； how happy I should behappier than I ever hoped to be； or had any conception of till I knew you。 〃But that can never be〃I hear you answer in a soft； low murmur。 Well； let me dream of it sometimesI am not happy too often； except when that favourite note； the harbinger of spring； recalling the hopes of my youth； whispers thy name and peace together in my ear。 I was reading something about Mr。 Macready to…day； and this put me in mind of that delicious night； when I went with your mother and you to see Romeo and Juliet。 Can I forget it for a momentyour sweet modest looks； your infinite propriety of behaviour； all your sweet winning waysyour hesitating about taking my arm as we came out till your mother didyour laughing about nearly losing your cloakyour stepping into the coach without my being able to make the slightest discoveryand oh！ my sitting down beside you there； you whom I had loved so long； so well； and your assuring me I had not lessened your pleasure at the play by being with you； and giving me your dear hand to press in mine！ I thought I was in heaventhat slender exquisitely…turned form contained my all of heaven upon earth； and as I folded youyes； you； my own best Sarah； to my bosom； there was； as you say； A TIE BETWEEN USyou did seem to me； for those few short moments； to be mine in all truth and honour and sacrednessOh！ that we could be always soDo not mock me； for I am a very child in love。 I ought to beg pardon for behaving so ill afterwards； but I hope THE LITTLE IMAGE made it up between us； &c。
＇To this letter I have received no answer； not a line。 The rolling years of eternity will never fill up that blank。 Where shall I be？ What am I？ Or where have I been？＇
WRITTEN IN A BLANK LEAF OF ENDYMION
I want a hand to guide me； an eye to cheer me； a bosom to repose on； all which I shall never have； but shall stagger into my grave； old before my time； unloved and unlovely； unless S。 L。 keeps her faith with me。
* * * * * * * * * * *
But by her dove's eyes and serpent…shape； I think she does not hate me；