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As soon as I entered the Exchange I planted myself in front of the counter; in spite of the discouragement which I too plainly perceived in her countenance; the unfavorable impression which I had made upon her at our last interview was still in force。
I plunged into it at once。 〃I have a confession to make。〃
〃You do me surprising honor。〃
〃Oh; now; don't begin like that! I suppose you never told a lie。〃
〃I'm telling the truth now when I say that I do not see why an entire stranger should confess anything to me。〃
〃Oh; my goodness! Well; I told you a lie; anyhow; a great; successful; deplorable lie。〃
She opened her mouth under the shock of it; and I recited to her unsparingly my deception; during this recital her mouth gradually closed。
〃Well; I declare; declare; declare!〃 she slowly and deliciously breathed over the sum total; and she considered me at length; silently; before her words came again; like a soft soliloquy。 〃I could never have believed it in one who〃here gayety flashed in her eyes suddenly〃parts his back hair so rigidly。 Oh; I beg your pardon for being personal!〃 And her gayety broke in ripples。 Some habitual instinct moved me to turn to the looking…glass。 〃Useless!〃 she cried; 〃you can't see it in that。 But it's perfectly splendid to…day。〃
Nature has been kind to me in many waysnay; prodigal; it is not every man who can perceive the humor in a jest of which he is himself the subject。 I laughed with her。 〃I trust that I am forgiven;〃 I said。
〃Oh; yes; you are forgiven! Come out; General; and give the gentleman your right paw; and tell him that he is forgivenif only for the sake of Daddy Ben。〃 With these latter words she gave me a gracious nod of understanding。 They were all thanking me for the kettle…supporter! She probably knew also the tale of John Mayrant; the cards; and the bedside。
The curly dog came out; and went through his part very graciously。
〃I can guess his last name;〃 I remarked。
〃General's? How? Oh; you've heard it! I don't believe in you any more。〃
〃That's not a bit handsome; after my confession。 No; I'm getting to understand South Carolina a little。 You came from the 'up…country;' you call your dog General; his name is General Hampton!〃
Her laughter assented。 〃Tell me some more about South Carolina;〃 she added with her caressing insinuation。
〃Well; to begin with〃
〃Go sit down at your lunch…table first。 Aunt Josephine would never tolerate my encouraging gentlemen to talk to me over the counter。〃
I went back obediently; and then resumed: 〃Well; what sort of people are those who own the handsome garden behind Mrs。 Trevise's!〃
〃I don't know them。〃
〃Thank you; that's all I wanted。〃
〃What do you mean?〃
〃They're new people。 I could tell it from the way you stuck your nose in the air。〃
〃Sir!〃
〃Oh; if you talk about my hair; I can talk about your nose; I think。 I suspected that they were: 'new people' because they cleaned up their garden immediately after the storm this morning。 Now; I'll tell you something else: the whole South looks down on the whole North。〃
She made her voice kind。 〃Do you mind it very much?〃
I joined in her latent mirth。 〃It makes life not worth living! But more than this; South Carolina looks down on the whole South。〃
〃Not Virginia。〃
〃Not? An 'entire stranger;' you know; sometimes notices things which escape the family eyefamily likenesses in the children; for instance。〃
〃Never Virginia;〃 she persisted。
〃Very well; very well! Somehow you've admitted the rest; however。〃
She began to smile。
〃And next; Kings Port looks down on all the rest of South Carolina。〃
She now laughed outright。 〃An up…country girl will not deny that; anyhow!〃
〃And finally; your aunts〃
〃My aunts are Kings Port。〃
〃The whole of it?〃
〃If you mean the thirty thousand negroes〃
〃No; there are other white people herethere goes your nose again!〃
〃I will not have you so impudent; sir!〃
〃A thousand pardons; I'm on my knees。 But your aunts〃 There was such a flash of war in her eye that I stopped。
〃May I not even mention them?〃 I asked her。
And suddenly upon this she became serious and gentle。 〃I thought that you understood them。 Would you take them from their seclusion; too? It is all they have leftsince you burned the rest in 1865。〃
I had made her say what I wanted! That 〃you〃 was what I wanted。 Now I should presently have it out with her。 But; for the moment; I did not disclaim the 〃you。〃 I said:
〃The burning in 1865 was horrible; but it was war。〃
〃It was outrage。〃
〃Yes; the same kind as England's; who burned Washington in 1812; and whom you all so deeply admire。〃
She had; it seemed; no answer to this。 But we trembled on the verge of a real quarrel。 It was in her voice when she said:
〃I think I interrupted you。〃
I pushed the risk one step nearer the verge; because of the words I wished finally to reach。 〃In 1812; when England burned our White House down; we did not sit in the ashes; we set about rebuilding。〃
And now she burst out。 〃That's not fair; that's perfectly inexcusable! Did England then set loose on us a pack of black savages and politicians to help us rebuild? Why; this very day I cannot walk on the other side of the river; I dare not venture off the New Bridge; and you who first beat us and then unleashed the blacks to riot in a new 'equality' that they were no more fit for than so many apes; you sat back at ease in your victory and your progress; having handed the vote to the negro as you might have handed a kerosene lamp to a child of three; and let us crushed; breathless people cope with the chaos and destruction that never came near you。 Why; how can you dare〃 Once again; admirably she pulled herself up as she had done when she spoke of the President。 〃I mustn't!〃 she declared; half whispering; and then more clearly and calmly; 〃I mustn't。〃 And she shook her head as if shaking something off。 〃Nor must you;〃 she finished; charmingly and quietly; with a smile。
〃I will not;〃 I assured her。 She was truly noble。
〃But I did think that you understood us;〃 she said pensively。
〃Miss La Heu; when you talked to me about the President and the White House; I said that you were hard to answer。 Do you remember?〃
〃Perfectly。 I said I was glad you found me so。'
〃You helped me to understand you then; and now I want to be helped to further understanding。 Last night I heard the 'Ode for the Daughters of Dixie。' I had a bad time listening to that。〃
〃Do you presume to criticise it? Do we criticise your Grand Army reunions; and your 'Marching through Georgia;' and your 'John Brown's Body;' and your Arlington Museum? Can we not be allowed to celebrate our heroes and our glories and sing our songs?〃
She had helped me already! Still; still; the something I was groping for; the something which had given me such pain during the ode; remained undissolved; remained unanalyzed between us; I still had to have it out with her; and the point was that it had to be with her; and not simply with myself alone。 We must thrash out together the way to an understanding; an agreement was not in the least necessarywe could agree to differ; for that matter; with perfect cordialitybut an understanding we must reach。 And as I was thinking this my light increased; and I saw clearly the ultimate thing which lay at the bottom of my own feeling; and which had been strangely confusing me all along。 This discovery was the key to the whole remainder of my talk; I never let go of it。 The first thing it opened for me was that Eliza La Heu didn't understand me; which was quite natural; since I had only just this moment become clear to myself。
〃Many of us;〃 I began; 〃who have watched the soiling touch of politics make dirty one clean thing after another; would not be wholly desolated to learn that the Grand Army of the Republic had gone to another world to sing its songs and draw its pensions。〃
She looked astonished; and then she laughed。 Down in the South here she was too far away to feel the vile uses to which present politics had turned past heroism
〃But;〃 I continued; 〃we haven't any Daughters of the Union banded together and handing it down。〃
〃It?〃 she echoed。 〃Well; if the deeds of your heroes are not a sacred trust to you; don't invite us; please; to resemble you。〃
I waited for more; and a little more came。
〃We consider Northerners foreigners; you know。〃
Again I felt that hurt which hearing the ode had given me; but I now knew how I was going to take it; and where we were presently coming out; and I knew she didn't mean quite all thatdidn't mean it every day; at least and that my speech had driven her to saying it。
〃No; Miss La Heu; you don't consider Northerners; who understand you; to be foreigners。〃
〃We have never met any of that sort。〃
(〃Yes;〃 I thought; 〃but you really want to。 Didn't you say you hoped I was one? Away down deep there's a cry of kinship in you; and that you don't hear it; and that we don't hear it; has been as much our fault as yours。 I see that very well now; but I'm afraid to tell you so; yet。〃)
What I said was: 〃We're handing the 'sacred trust' down; I hope。〃
〃I understood you to say you weren't。〃
〃I said we were not handing 'it' down。〃
I didn