按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
〃Let me go； mamma；〃 said Neelie； shrinking under her mother's
grasp。 〃You hurt me。〃
〃Tell me why you have brought up my breakfast this morning；〃
persisted Mrs。 Milroy。
〃I have told you； mamma。〃
〃You have not！ You have made an excuse； I see it in your face。
Come！ what is it？〃
Neelie's resolution ga ve way before her mother's。 She looked
aside uneasily at the things in the tray。 〃I have been vexed；〃
she said； with an effort； 〃and I didn't want to stop in the
breakfast…room。 I wanted to come up here； and to speak to you。〃
〃Vexed？ Who has vexed you？ What has happened？ Has Miss Gwilt
anything to do with it？〃
Neelie looked round again at her mother in sudden curiosity and
alarm。 〃Mamma！〃 she said； 〃you read my thoughts。 I declare you
frighten me。 It _was_ Miss Gwilt。〃
Before Mrs。 Milroy could say a word more on her side； the door
opened and the nurse looked in。
〃Have you got what you want？〃 she asked； as composedly as usual。
〃Miss； there； insisted on taking your tray up this morning。 Has
she broken anything？〃
〃Go to the window。 I want to speak to Rachel。〃 said Mrs。 Milroy。
As soon as her daughter's back was turned； she beckoned eagerly
to the nurse。 〃Anything wrong？〃 she asked； in a whisper。 〃Do you
think she suspects us？〃
The nurse turned away with her hard； sneering smile。 〃I told you
it should be done；〃 she said； 〃and it _has_ been done。 She hasn't
the ghost of a suspicion。 I waited in the room； and I saw her
take up the letter and open it。〃
Mrs。 Milroy drew a deep breath of relief。 〃Thank you；〃 she said；
loud enough for her daughter to hear。 〃I want nothing more。〃
The nurse withdrew； and Neelie came back from the window。 Mrs。
Milroy took her by the hand； and looked at her more attentively
and more kindly than usual。 Her daughter interested her that
morning； for her daughter had something to say on the subject of
Miss Gwilt。
〃I used to think that you promised to be pretty； child；〃 she
said； cautiously resuming the interrupted conversation in the
least direct way。 〃But you don't seem to be keeping your promise。
You look out of health and out of spirits。 What is the matter
with you？〃
If there had been any sympathy between mother and child； Neelie
might have owned the truth。 She might have said frankly： 〃I am
looking ill； because my life is miserable to me。 I am fond of Mr。
Armadale； and Mr。 Armadale was once fond of me。 We had one little
disagreement； only one； in which I was to blame。 I wanted to tell
him so at the time； and I have wanted to tell him so ever since；
and Miss Gwilt stands between us and prevents me。 She has made us
like strangers； she has altered him； and taken him away from me。
He doesn't look at me as he did； he doesn't speak to me as he
did； he is never alone with me as he used to be； I can't say the
words to him that I long to say； and I can't write to him； for it
would look as if I wanted to get him back。 It is all over between
me and Mr。 Armadale； and it is that woman's fault。 There is
ill…blood between Miss Gwilt and me the whole day long； and say
what I may； and do what I may； she always gets the better of me；
and always puts me in the wrong。 Everything I saw at Thorpe
Ambrose pleased me； everything I did at Thorpe Ambrose made me
happy； before she came。 Nothing pleases me； and nothing makes me
happy now！〃 If Neelie had ever been accustomed to ask her
mother's advice and to trust herself to her mother's love； she
might have said such words as these。 As。 it was； the tears came
into her eyes； and she hung her head in silence。
〃Come！〃 said Mrs。 Milroy； beginning to lose patience。 〃You have
something to say to me about Miss Gwilt。 What is it？〃
Neelie forced back her tears； and made an effort to answer。
〃She aggravates me beyond endurance； mamma； I can't bear her； I
shall do something〃 Neelie stopped； and stamped her foot
angrily on the floor。 〃I shall throw something at her head if we
go on much longer like this！ I should have thrown something this
morning if I hadn't left the room。 Oh； do speak to papa about it！
Do find out some reason for sending her away！ I'll go to
schoolI'll do anything in the world to get rid of Miss Gwilt！〃
To get rid of Miss Gwilt！ At those wordsat that echo from her
daughter's lips of the one dominant desire kept secret in her own
heartMrs。 Milroy slowly raised herself in bed。 What did it
mean？ Was the help she wanted coming from the very last of all
quarters in which she could have thought of looking for it？
〃Why do you want to get rid of Miss Gwilt？〃 she asked。 〃What have
you got to complain of？〃
〃Nothing！〃 said Neelie。 〃That's the aggravation of it。 Miss Gwilt
won't let me have anything to complain of。 She is perfectly
detestable； she is driving me mad； and she is the pink of
propriety all the time。 I dare say it's wrong； but I don't
careI hate her！〃
Mrs。 Milroy's eyes questioned her daughter's face as they had
never questioned it yet。 There was something under the surface；
evidentlysomething which it might be of vital importance to her
own purpose to discoverwhich had not risen into view。 She went
on probing her way deeper and deeper into Neelie's mind； with a
warmer and warmer interest in Neelie's secret。
〃Pour me out a cup of tea；〃 she said； 〃and don't excite yourself；
my dear。 Why do you speak to _me_ about this？ Why don't you speak
to your father？〃
〃I have tried to speak to papa；〃 said Neelie。 〃But it's no use；
he is too good to know what a wretch she is。 She is always on her
best behavior with him； she is always contriving to be useful to
him。 I can't make him understand why I dislike Miss Gwilt； I
can't make _you_ understandI only understand it myself。〃 She
tried to pour out the tea； and in trying upset the cup。 〃I'll go
downstairs again！〃 exclaimed Neelie； with a burst of tears。 〃I'm
not fit for anything； I can't even pour out a cup of tea！〃
Mrs。 Milroy seized her hand and stopped her。 Trifling as it was；
Neelie's reference to the relations between the major and Miss
Gwilt had roused her mother's ready jealousy。 The restraints
which Mrs。 Milroy had laid on herself thus far vanished in a
momentvanished even in the presence of a girl of sixteen； and
that girl her own child！
〃Wait here！〃 she said； eagerly。 〃You have come to the right place
and the right person。 Go on abusing Miss Gwilt。 I like to hear
youI hate her； too！〃
〃You； mamma！〃 exclaimed Neelie； looking at her mother in
astonishment。
For a moment Mrs。 Milroy hesitated before she said more。 Some
last…left instinct of her married life in its earlier and happier
time pleaded hard with her to respect the youth and the sex of
her child。 But jealousy respects nothing； in the heaven above and
on the earth beneath； nothing but itself。 The slow fire of
self…torment； burning night and day in the miserable woman's
breast； flashed its deadly light into her eyes； as the next words
dropped slowly and venomously from her lips。
〃If you had had eyes in your head； you would never have gone to
your father；〃 she said。 〃Your father has reasons of his own for
hearing nothing that you can say； or that anybody can say；
against Miss Gwilt。〃
Many girls at Neelie's age would have failed to see the meaning
hidden under those words。 It was the daughter's misfortune； in
this instance； to have had experience enough of the mother to
understand her。 Neelie started back from the bedside； with her
face in a glow。 〃Mamma！〃 she said； 〃you are talking horribly！
Papa is the best； and dearest； and kindestoh； I won't hear it！
I won't hear it！〃
Mrs。 Milroy's fierce temper broke out in an instantbroke out
all the more violently from her feeling herself； in spite of
herself； to have been in the wrong。
〃You impudent little fool！〃 she retorted； furiously。 〃Do you
think I want _you_ to remind me of what I owe to your father？ Am
I to learn how to speak of your father； and how to think of your
father； and how to love and honor your father； from a forward
little minx like you！ I was finely disappointed； I can tell you；
when you were bornI wished for a boy； you impudent hussy！ If
you ever find a man who is fool enough to marry you； he will be a
lucky man if you only love him half as well； a quarter as well； a
hundred…thousandth part as well； as I loved your father。 Ah； you
can cry when it's too late； you can come creeping back to beg
your mother's pardon after you have insulted her。 You little
dowdy； half…grown creature！ I was handsomer than ever you will be
when I married your father。 I would have gone through fire and
water to serve your father！ If he had asked me to cut off one of
my arms； I would have done itI would have done it to please
him！〃 She turned suddenly with her face to the wall； forgetting
her daughter； forgetting her husband； forgetting everything but
the torturing remembrance of her lost beauty。 〃My arms！〃 she
repeated to herself； faintly。 〃What arms I had when I was young！〃
She snatched up the sleeve of her dressing…gown furtively； with a
shudder。 〃Oh； look at it now！ look at it now！〃
Neelie fell on her knees at the bedside and hid her face。 In
sheer despair of finding comfort and help anywhere else； she had
cast herself impulsively on her m