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we have traced from its tiniest fountains; and hoped to see flow onward; with increasing current; into the ocean; here dashes itself over that terrific Lover's Leap; and; as a mad…foaming cataract; flies wholly into tumultuous clouds of spray! Low down it indeed collects again into pools and plashes; yet only at a great distance; and with difficulty; if at all; into a general stream。 To cast a glance into certain of those pools and plashes; and trace whither they run; must; for a chapter or two; form the limit of our endeavor。
For which end doubtless those direct historical Notices; where they can be met with; are the best。 Nevertheless; of this sort too there occurs much; which; with our present light; it were questionable to emit。 Teufelsdrockh vibrating everywhere between the highest and the lowest levels; comes into contact with public History itself。 For example; those conversations and relations with illustrious Persons; as Sultan Mahmoud; the Emperor Napoleon; and others; are they not as yet rather of a diplomatic character than of a biographic? The Editor; appreciating the sacredness of crowned heads; nay perhaps suspecting the possible trickeries of a Clothes…Philosopher; will eschew this province for the present; a new time may bring new insight and a different duty。
If we ask now; not indeed with what ulterior Purpose; for there was none; yet with what immediate outlooks; at all events; in what mood of mind; the Professor undertook and prosecuted this world…pilgrimage;the answer is more distinct than favorable。 〃A nameless Unrest;〃 says he; 〃urged me forward; to which the outward motion was some momentary lying solace。 Whither should I go? My Loadstars were blotted out; in that canopy of grim fire shone no star。 Yet forward must I; the ground burnt under me; there was no rest for the sole of my foot。 I was alone; alone! Ever too the strong inward longing shaped Phantasms for itself: towards these; one after the other; must I fruitlessly wander。 A feeling I had; that for my fever…thirst there was and must be somewhere a healing Fountain。 To many fondly imagined Fountains; the Saints' Wells of these days; did I pilgrim; to great Men; to great Cities; to great Events: but found there no healing。 In strange countries; as in the well…known; in savage deserts; as in the press of corrupt civilization; it was ever the same: how could your Wanderer escape from_his own Shadow_? Nevertheless still Forward! I felt as if in great haste; to do I saw not what。 From the depths of my own heart; it called to me; Forwards! The winds and the streams; and all Nature sounded to me; Forwards! _Ach Gott_; I was even; once for all; a Son of Time。〃
From which is it not clear that the internal Satanic School was still active enough? He says elsewhere: 〃The _Enchiridion of Epictetus_ I had ever with me; often as my sole rational companion; and regret to mention that the nourishment it yielded was trifling。〃 Thou foolish Teufelsdrockh How could it else? Hadst thou not Greek enough to understand thus much: _The end of Man is an Action; and not a Thought_; though it were the noblest?
〃How I lived?〃 writes he once: 〃Friend; hast thou considered the 'rugged all…nourishing Earth;' as Sophocles well names her; how she feeds the sparrow on the house…top; much more her darling; man? While thou stirrest and livest; thou hast a probability of victual。 My breakfast of tea has been cooked by a Tartar woman; with water of the Amur; who wiped her earthen kettle with a horse…tail。 I have roasted wild eggs in the sand of Sahara; I have awakened in Paris _Estrapades_ and Vienna _Malzleins_; with no prospect of breakfast beyond elemental liquid。 That I had my Living to seek saved me from Dying;by suicide。 In our busy Europe; is there not an everlasting demand for Intellect; in the chemical; mechanical; political; religious; educational; commercial departments? In Pagan countries; cannot one write Fetishes? Living! Little knowest thou what alchemy is in an inventive Soul; how; as with its little finger; it can create provision enough for the body (of a Philosopher); and then; as with both hands; create quite other than provision; namely; spectres to torment itself withal。〃
Poor Teufelsdrockh! Flying with Hunger always parallel to him; and a whole Infernal Chase in his rear; so that the countenance of Hunger is comparatively a friend's! Thus must he; in the temper of ancient Cain; or of the modern Wandering Jew;save only that he feels himself not guilty and but suffering the pains of guilt;wend to and fro with aimless speed。 Thus must he; over the whole surface of the Earth (by footprints); write his _Sorrows of Teufelsdrockh_; even as the great Goethe; in passionate words; had to write his _Sorrows of Werter_; before the spirit freed herself; and he could become a Man。 Vain truly is the hope of your swiftest Runner to escape 〃from his own Shadow〃! Nevertheless; in these sick days; when the Born of Heaven first descries himself (about the age of twenty) in a world such as ours; richer than usual in two things; in Truths grown obsolete; and Trades grown obsolete;what can the fool think but that it is all a Den of Lies; wherein whoso will not speak Lies and act Lies; must stand idle and despair? Whereby it happens that; for your nobler minds; the publishing of some such Work of Art; in one or the other dialect; becomes almost a necessity。 For what is it properly but an Altercation with the Devil; before you begin honestly Fighting him? Your Byron publishes his _Sorrows of Lord George_; in verse and in prose; and copiously otherwise: your Bonaparte represents his _Sorrows of Napoleon_ Opera; in an all…too stupendous style; with music of cannon…volleys; and murder…shrieks of a world; his stage…lights are the fires of Conflagration; his rhyme and recitative are the tramp of embattled Hosts and the sound of falling Cities。Happier is he who; like our Clothes…Philosopher; can write such matter; since it must be written; on the insensible Earth; with his shoe…soles only; and also survive the writing thereof!
CHAPTER VII。 THE EVERLASTING NO。
Under the strange nebulous envelopment; wherein our Professor has now shrouded himself; no doubt but his spiritual nature is nevertheless progressive; and growing: for how can the 〃Son of Time;〃 in any case; stand still? We behold him; through those dim years; in a state of crisis; of transition: his mad Pilgrimings; and general solution into aimless Discontinuity; what is all this but a mad Fermentation; wherefrom the fiercer it is; the clearer product will one day evolve itself?
Such transitions are ever full of pain: thus the Eagle when he moults is sickly; and; to attain his new beak; must harshly dash off the old one upon rocks。 What Stoicism soever our Wanderer; in his individual acts and motions; may affect; it is clear that there is a hot fever of anarchy and misery raging within; coruscations of which flash out: as; indeed; how could there be other? Have we not seen him disappointed; bemocked of Destiny; through long years? All that the young heart might desire and pray for has been denied; nay; as in the last worst instance; offered and then snatched away。 Ever an 〃excellent Passivity;〃 but of useful; reasonable Activity; essential to the former as Food to Hunger; nothing granted: till at length; in this wild Pilgrimage; he must forcibly seize for himself an Activity; though useless; unreasonable。 Alas; his cup of bitterness; which had been filling drop by drop; ever since that first 〃ruddy morning〃 in the Hinterschlag Gymnasium; was at the very lip; and then with that poison…drop; of the Towgood…and…Blumine business; it runs over; and even hisses over in a deluge of foam。
He himself says once; with more justness than originality: 〃Men is; properly speaking; based upon Hope; he has no other possession but Hope; this world of his is emphatically the Place of Hope。〃 What; then; was our Professor's possession? We see him; for the present; quite shut out from Hope; looking not into the golden orient; but vaguely all round into a dim copper firmament; pregnant with earthquake and tornado。
Alas; shut out from Hope; in a deeper sense than we yet dream of! For; as he wanders wearisomely through this world; he has now lost all tidings of another and higher。 Full of religion; or at least of religiosity; as our Friend has since exhibited himself; he hides not that; in those days; he was wholly irreligious: 〃Doubt had darkened into Unbelief;〃 says he; 〃shade after shade goes grimly over your soul; till you have the fixed; starless; Tartarean black。〃 To such readers as have reflected; what can be called reflecting; on man's life; and happily discovered; in contradiction to much Profit…and…Loss Philosophy; speculative and practical; that Soul is not synonymous with Stomach; who understand; therefore; in our Friend's words; 〃that; for man's well…being; Faith is properly the one thing needful; how; with it; Martyrs; otherwise weak; can cheerfully endure the shame and the cross; and without it; Worldlings puke up their sick existence; by suicide; in the midst of luxury:〃 to such it will be clear that; for a pure moral nature; the loss of his religious Belief was