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Seventhly and lastly； a Traveller of a kind familiar to my boyhood； but
now almost obsolete；a Book…Pedler； who had a quantity of Pamphlets
and Numbers with him； and who presently boasted that he could repeat
more verses in an evening than he could sell in a twelvemonth。
All these I have mentioned in the order in which they sat at table。 I
presided； and the matronly presence faced me。 We were not long in
taking our places； for the supper had arrived with me； in the following
procession：
Myself with the pitcher。 Ben with Beer。 Inattentive Boy with hot
plates。 Inattentive Boy with hot plates。 THE TURKEY。 Female carrying
sauces to be heated on the spot。 THE BEEF。 Man with Tray on his head；
containing Vegetables and Sundries。 Volunteer Hostler from Hotel；
grinning； And rendering no assistance。
As we passed along the High Street； comet…like； we left a long tail of
fragrance behind us which caused the public to stop； sniffing in wonder。
We had previously left at the corner of the inn…yard a wall…eyed young
man connected with the Fly department； and well accustomed to the sound
of a railway whistle which Ben always carries in his pocket； whose
instructions were； so soon as he should hear the whistle blown； to dash
into the kitchen； seize the hot plum…pudding and mince…pies； and speed
with them to Watts's Charity； where they would be received （he was
further instructed） by the sauce…female； who would be provided with
brandy in a blue state of combustion。
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All these arrangements were executed in the most exact and punctual
manner。 I never saw a finer turkey； finer beef； or greater prodigality of
sauce and gravy；and my Travellers did wonderful justice to everything
set before them。 It made my heart rejoice to observe how their wind and
frost hardened faces softened in the clatter of plates and knives and forks；
and mellowed in the fire and supper heat。 While their hats and caps and
wrappers； hanging up； a few small bundles on the ground in a corner； and
in another corner three or four old walking…sticks； worn down at the end to
mere fringe； linked this smug interior with the bleak outside in a golden
chain。
When supper was done； and my brown beauty had been elevated on
the table； there was a general requisition to me to 〃take the corner；〃 which
suggested to me comfortably enough how much my friends here made of a
fire；for when had I ever thought so highly of the corner； since the days
when I connected it with Jack Horner？ However； as I declined； Ben；
whose touch on all convivial instruments is perfect； drew the table apart；
and instructing my Travellers to open right and left on either side of me；
and form round the fire； closed up the centre with myself and my chair；
and preserved the order we had kept at table。 He had already； in a
tranquil manner； boxed the ears of the inattentive boys until they had been
by imperceptible degrees boxed out of the room； and he now rapidly
skirmished the sauce…female into the High Street； disappeared； and softly
closed the door。
This was the time for bringing the poker to bear on the billet of wood。
I tapped it three times； like an enchanted talisman； and a brilliant host of
merry…makers burst out of it； and sported off by the chimney；rushing up
the middle in a fiery country dance； and never coming down again。
Meanwhile； by their sparkling light； which threw our lamp into the shade；
I filled the glasses； and gave my Travellers； CHRISTMAS！
CHRISTMAS…EVE； my friends； when the shepherds； who were Poor
Travellers； too； in their way； heard the Angels sing； 〃On earth； peace。
Good…will towards men！〃
I don't know who was the first among us to think that we ought to take
hands as we sat； in deference to the toast； or whether any one of us
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anticipated the others； but at any rate we all did it。 We then drank to the
memory of the good Master Richard Watts。 And I wish his Ghost may
never have had worse usage under that roof than it had from us。
It was the witching time for Story…telling。 〃Our whole life；
Travellers；〃 said I； 〃is a story more or less intelligible； generally less； but
we shall read it by a clearer light when it is ended。 I； for one； am so
divided this night between fact and fiction； that I scarce know which is
which。 Shall I beguile the time by telling you a story as we sit here？〃
They all answered； yes。 I had little to tell them； but I was bound by
my own proposal。 Therefore； after looking for awhile at the spiral
column of smoke wreathing up from my brown beauty； through which I
could have almost sworn I saw the effigy of Master Richard Watts less
startled than usual； I fired away。
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CHAPTER IITHE STORY OF
RICHARD DOUBLEDICK
In the year one thousand seven hundred and ninety…nine； a relative of
mine came limping down； on foot； to this town of Chatham。 I call it this
town； because if anybody present knows to a nicety where Rochester ends
and Chatham begins； it is more than I do。 He was a poor traveller； with
not a farthing in his pocket。 He sat by the fire in this very room； and he
slept one night in a bed that will be occupied tonight by some one here。
My relative came down to Chatham to enlist in a cavalry regiment； if a
cavalry regiment would have him； if not； to take King George's shilling
from any corporal or sergeant who would put a bunch of ribbons in his hat。
His object was to get shot； but he thought he might as well ride to death as
be at the trouble of walking。
My relative's Christian name was Richard； but he was better known as
Dick。 He dropped his own surname on the road down； and took up that
of Doubledick。 He was passed as Richard Doubledick； age； twenty… two；
height； five foot ten； native place； Exmouth； which he had never been near
in his life。 There was no cavalry in Chatham when he limped over the
bridge here with half a shoe to his dusty feet； so he enlisted into a regiment
of the line； and was glad to get drunk and forget all about it。
You are to know that this relative of mine had gone wrong； and run
wild。 His heart was in the right place； but it was sealed up。 He had
been betrothed to a good and beautiful girl； whom he had loved better than
sheor perhaps even hebelieved； but in an evil hour he had given her
cause to say to him solemnly； 〃Richard； I will never marry another man。
I will live single for your sake； but Mary Marshall's lips〃her name was
Mary Marshall〃never address another word to you on earth。 Go；
Richard！ Heaven forgive you！〃 This finished him。 This brought him
down to Chatham。 This made him Private Richard Doubledick； with a
determination to be shot。
There was not a more dissipated and reckless soldier in Chatham
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barracks； in the year one thousand seven hundred and ninety…nine； than
Private Richard Doubledick。 He associated with the dregs of every
regiment； he was as seldom sober as he could be； and was constantly
under punishment。 It became clear to the whole barracks that Private
Richard Doubledick would very soon be flogged。
Now the Captain of Richard Doubledick's company was a young
gentleman not above five years his senior； whose eyes had an expression
in them which affected Private Richard Doubledick in a very remarkable
way。 They were bright； handsome