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count bunker-第22章

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er; I would venture to inquire what are your views upon some of the current topics。  Take any one you like; sir; so long as it's good and solid; and let me hear what you have to say about it。  What you favor us with will not be repeated beyond this room; but merely regarded by my son and myself as proving that we are getting no dunder…headed dandy for our Eleanor; but an article of real substantial valuethe kind of thing they might make into a Lord…lieutenant or a Viceroy in a bad year。〃

Tempting in every way as this suggestion sounded; his lordship nevertheless appeared to find a little initial difficulty in choosing a topic。

〃Speak out; sir;〃 said Mr。 Maddison in an encouraging tone。  〃Our standard for noblemen isn't anything remarkably high。  With a duke I'd be content with just a few dates and something about model cottages; and; though a baron ought to know a little more than that; still we'll count these feudal bagpipers and that ancestral hop…scotch performance as a kind of set… off to your credit。  Suppose you just say a few words on the future of the Anglo…Saxon race。  What you've learned from the papers will do; so long as you seem to understand it。〃

Perceiving that his Teutonic friend looked a trifle dismayed at this selection; Count Bunker suggested the Triple Alliance as an alternative。

〃That needs more facts; I guess;〃 said the millionaire; 〃but it will be all the more creditable if you can manage it。〃

The Baron cleared his throat to begin; and as he happened (as the Count was well aware) to have the greatest enthusiasm for this policy; and to have recently read the thirteen volumes of Professor Bungstrumpher on the subject; he delivered a peroration so remarkable alike for its fervor; its facts; and its phenomenal length; that when; upon a gentle hint from the Count; he at last paused; all traces of objection had vanished from the minds of Darius P。 Maddison; senior and junior。

〃I need no longer detain you; Lord Tulliwuddle;〃 said the millionaire respectfully。  〃Ri; fetch your sister into her room。  Your lordship; I have received an intellectual treat。  I am very deeply gratified; sir。  Allow me to conduct you to my daughter's boudoir。〃

Flushed with his exertions and his triumph though the Baron was; he yet remembered so vividly the ordeal preceding the oration that as they went he whispered in his friend's ear

〃Ah; Bonker; stay mit me; I pray you!  If she should ask more questions!

〃Mr。 Maddison; ze Count will stay mit me。〃

Though a little surprised at this arrangement; which scarcely accorded with his lordship's virile appearance and dashing air; Mr。 Maddison was by this time too favorably disposed to question the wisdom of any suggestion he might make; and accordingly the two friends found themselves closeted together in Miss Maddison's sanctum awaiting the appearance of the heiress。

〃Shall I remain through the entire interview?〃 asked the Count。

〃Oh yes; mine Bonker; you most!  Orvell; soppose it gets unnecessary zen vill I cry 'By ze Gad!' and you vill know to go。〃

〃 'By the Gad'?  I see。〃

〃Orvell; not ze first time; but if I say it tree times; zen vill you make an excuse。〃

〃Three times?  I understand; Baron。〃



CHAPTER XXII

In the eye of the heiress; as in her father's; might be noted a shade of surprise at finding two gentlemen instead of one。  But though the Count instantly perceived his superfluity; and though it had been his greatest ambition throughout his life to add no shade to the dullness with which he frequently complained that life was overburdened; yet his sense of obligation to his friend was so strong that he preferred to bore rather than desert。  As the only compensation he could offer; he assumed the most retiring look of which his mobile features were capable; and pretended to examine one of the tables of curios。

〃Lord Tulliwuddle; I congratulate you on the very happy impression you have made!〃 began Eleanor with the most delightful frankness。

But his lordship had learned to fear the Americans; even bearing compliments。

〃So?〃 he answered stolidly。

〃Indeed you have!  Ri is just wild about your cleverness。〃

〃Zat is kind of him。〃

〃He declares you are quite an authority on European politics。  Now you will be able to tell me〃

〃Ach; no!  I shall not to…day; please!〃 interrupted the Baron hurriedly。

The heiress seemed disconcerted。

〃Oh; not if you'd rather not; Lord Tulliwuddle。〃

〃Not to…day。〃

〃Well!〃

She turned with a shrug and cast her eyes upon the wall。

〃How do you like this picture?  It's my latest toy。  I call it just sweet!〃

He cautiously examined the painting。

〃It is vary pretty。〃

〃Do you know Romney's work?〃

The Baron shrank back。

〃Not again to…day; please!〃

Miss Maddison opened her handsome eyes to their widest。

〃My word!〃 she cried。  〃If these are Highland manners; Lord Tulliwuddle!〃

In extreme confusion the Baron stammered

〃I beg your pardon!  Forgif mebutach; not zose questions; please!〃

Relenting a little; she inquired

〃What may I ask you; then?  Do tell me!  You see I want just to know all about you。〃

With an affrighted gesture the Baron turned to his friend。

〃Bonker;〃 said he; 〃she does vant to know yet more about me!  Vill you please to tell her。〃

The Count looked up from the curios with an expression so bland that the air began to clear even before he spoke。

〃Miss Maddison; I must explain that my friend's proud Highland spirit has been a little disturbed by some inquiries; made in all good faith by your father。  No offence; I am certain; was intended; erroneous informationa little hastiness in jumping to conclusions a sensitive nature wounded by the least insinuation such were the unfortunate causes of Tulliwuddle's excusable reticence。  Believe me; if you knew all; your opinion of him would alter very; very considerably!〃

The perfectly accurate peroration to this statement produced an immediate effect。

〃What a shame!〃 cried Eleanor; her eyes sparkling brightly。  〃Lord Tulliwuddle; I am so sorry!〃

The Baron looked into these eyes; and his own mien altered perceptibly。  For an instant he gazed; and then in a low voice remarked

〃By ze Gad!〃

〃Once!〃 counted the conscientious Bunker。

〃Lord Tulliwuddle;〃 she continued; 〃I declare I feel so ashamed of those stupid men; I could just wring their necks!  Now; just to make us quits; you ask me anything in the world you like!〃

Over his shoulder the Baron threw a stealthy glance at his friend; but this time he did not invoke his assistance。  Instead; he again murmured very distinctly

〃By ze Gad!〃

〃Twice!〃 counted Bunker。

〃Miss Maddison;〃 said the Baron to the flushed and eager girl; 〃am I to onderstand zat you now are satisfied zat I am not too vicked; too suspeecious; too unvorthy of your charming society?  I do not say I am yet vorthybot jost not too bad!〃

Had the Baroness at that moment heard merely the intonation of his voice; she would undoubtedly have preferred a Chinese prison。

〃Indeed; Lord Tulliwuddle; you may。〃

〃By ze Gad!〃 announced the Baron; in a voice braced with resolution。

〃May I take the liberty of inspecting the aviary?〃 said the Count。

〃With the very greatest pleasure;〃 replied the heiress kindly。

His last distinct impression as he withdrew was of the Baron giving his mustache a more formidable twirl。

〃A very pretty little scene;〃 he reflected; as he strolled out in search of others。  〃Though; hang me; I'm not sure if it ended in the right man leaving the stage!〃

This 〃second…fiddle feeling;〃 as he styled it humorously to himself; was further increased by the demeanor of Miss Gallosh; to whom he now endeavored to make himself agreeable。  Though sharing the universal respect felt for the character and talents of the Count; she was evidently too perturbed at seeing him appear alone to appreciate his society as it deserved。  Ever since luncheon poor Eva's heart had been sinking。  The beauty; the assurance; the cleverness; and the charm of the fabulously wealthy American heiress had filled her with vague misgivings even while the gentlemen were safely absent; but when Miss Maddison was summoned away; and her father and brother took her place; her uneasiness vastly increased。  Now here was the last buffer removed between the chieftain and her audacious rival (so she already counted her)。  What drama could these mysterious movements have been leading to?

In vain did Count Bunker exercise his unique powers of conversation。  In vain did he discourse on the beauties of nature as displayed in the wooded valley and the towering hills; and the beauties of art as exhibited in the aviary and the new fir forest。  Eva's thoughts were too much engrossed with the beauties of woman; and their dreadful consequences if improperly used。

〃Isis Miss Maddison still in the house?〃 she inquired; with an effort to put the question carelessly。

〃I believe so;〃 said the Count in his kindest voice。

〃Andandthat isn't Lord Tulliwuddle with my father; is it?〃

〃I believe not;〃 said the Count; still more sympathetically。

She could no longer withhold a sigh; and the Count tactfully turned the conversation to the symbolical eagle arrived that morning from Mr。 Maddiso
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