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our own pleasure； and striving to attain the same endhappiness； the
impossible happiness。 It would be folly on my part to say you were
wrong； dear friend； even though I think myself in the right。
〃And you； my Thais； go and enjoy yourself； and be more happy still； if
it be possible； in abstinence and austerity than you have been in
riches and pleasure。 On the whole； I should say you were to be envied。
For if in our whole lives； Paphnutius and I have pursued but one kind
of pleasurable satisfaction； you in your life； dear Thais； have tasted
diverse joys such as it is rarely given to the same person to know。 I
should really like to be for one hour； a saint like our dear friend
Paphnutius。 But that is not possible。 Farewell； then； Thais！ Go where
the secret forces of nature and your destiny conduct you！ Go； and take
with you； whithersoever you go； the good wishes of Nicias！ I know that
is mere foolishness； but can I give you anything more than barren
regrets and vain wishes in payment for the delicious illusions which
once enveloped me when I was in your arms； and of which only the
shadow now remains to me？ Farewell； my benefactress！ Farewell；
goodness that is ignorant of its own existence； mysterious virtue； joy
of men！ Farewell to the most adorable of the images that nature has
ever thrownfor some unknown reasonson the face of this deceptive
world！〃
Whilst he spoke； deep wrath had been brewing in the monk's heart； and
it now broke forth in imprecations。
〃Avaunt； cursed wretch！ I scorn thee and hate thee。 Go； child of hell；
a thousand times worse than those poor lost ones who just now threw
stones and insults at me！ They knew not what they did； and the grace
of God； which I implored for them； may some day descend into their
hearts。 But thou； detestable Nicias； thou art but a perfidious venom
and a bitter poison。 Thy mouth breathes despair and death。 One of thy
smiles contains more blasphemy than issues in a century from the
smoking lips of Satan。 Avaunt； backslider！〃
Nicias looked at him。
〃Farewell； my brother；〃 he said； 〃and may you preserve until your
life's end your store of faith； hate； and love。 Farewell； Thais！ It is
in vain that you will forget me； because I shall ever remember you。〃
On quitting them he walked thoughtfully through the winding streets in
the vicinity of the great cemetery of Alexandria； which are peopled by
the makers of funeral urns。 Their shops were full of clay figures
painted in bright colours and representing gods and goddesses； mimes；
women； winged sprites； &c。； such as were usually buried with the dead。
He fancied that perhaps some of the little images which he saw there
might be the companions of his eternal sleep； and it seemed to him
that a little Eros； with its tunic tucked up； laughed at him
mockingly。 He looked forward to his death； and the idea was painful to
him。 To cure his sadness he tried to philosophise； and reasoned thus
〃Assuredly；〃 he said to himself； 〃time has no reality。 It is a simple
illusion of our minds。 Then； if it does not exist； how can it bring
death to me？ Does that mean that I shall live for ever？ No； but I
conclude therefrom that my death is； always has been； as it always
will be。 I do not feel it yet； but it is in me； and I ought not to
fear it； for it would be folly to dread the coming of that which has
arrived。 It exists； like the last page of a book I read and have not
finished。〃
This argument occupied him all the rest of the way； but without making
him more cheerful； and his mind was filled with dismal thoughts when
he arrived at the door of his house and heard the merry laughter of
Crobyle and Myrtale； who were playing at tennis whilst they were
waiting for him。
Paphnutius and Thais left the city by the Gate of the Moon； and
followed the coast。
〃Woman；〃 said the monk； 〃all that great blue sea could not wash away
thy pollutions。〃
He spoke with scorn and anger。
〃More filthy than a bitch or a sow； thou hast prostituted to pagans
and infidels a body which the Eternal had intended for a tabernacle；
and thy impurities are such that； now that thou knowest the truth；
thou canst not unite thy lips or join thy hands without a horror of
thyself rising in thy heart。〃
She followed him meekly； over stony roads； under a burning sun。 Her
knees ached from fatigue； and her throat was parched with thirst。 But；
far from feeling any of the pity which softens the hearts of the
profane； Paphnutius rejoiced at these propitiatory sufferings of the
flesh which had so sinned。 So infuriated was he with holy zeal that he
would have liked to cut with rods the body that had preserved its
beauty as a shining witness to its infamy。 His meditations augmented
his pious fury； and remembering that Thais had received Nicias in her
bed； that idea seemed so horrible to him that his blood all flowed
back to his heart； and his breast felt ready to burst。 His curses were
stifled in his throat； and he could only grind his teeth。 He sprang
forward and stood before her； pale； terrible； and filled with the
Spirit of Godlooked into her very soul； and then spat in her face。
She calmly wiped her face and continued to walk on。 He followed；
glaring at her in pious anger； as if she had been hell itself。 He was
thinking how he could avenge Christ in order that Christ should not
avenge Himself； when he saw a drop of blood that had dripped from the
foot of Thais on the sand。 Then a hitherto unknown influence entered
his opened heart； sobs rose to his lips； he wept； he ran and knelt
before her； called her his sister； and kissed her bleeding feet。 He
murmured a hundred times； 〃My sister； my sister； my mother； O most
holy！〃
He prayed
〃Angels of heaven； receive carefully this drop of blood； and bear it
before the throne of the Lord。 And may a miraculous anemone blossom on
the sand sprinkled with the blood of Thais； that those who see the
flower may recover purity of heart and feeling。 O holy； holy； most
holy Thais！〃
As he prayed and prophesied thus； a lad passed on an ass。 Paphnutius
ordered him to descend； seated Thais on the ass； and led it by the
bridle。 Towards evening they came to a canal shaded by fine trees； he
tied the ass to the trunk of a date palm； and sitting on a mossy stone
he shared with Thais a loaf； which they ate with salt and hyssop。 They
drank fresh water in their hands； and talked of things eternal。 She
said
〃I have never drunk water so pure nor breathed an air so light； and I
feel that God floats in the breezes that pass。〃
〃Look！ it is the evening； O my sister。 The blue shadows of night cover
the hills。 But soon thou wilt see shining in the dawn the tabernacles
of Light； soon thou wilt behold shine forth the roses of the eternal
morning。〃
They journeyed all night； and； while the crescent moon gleamed on the
silver crests of the waves； they sang psalms and hymns。 When the sun
rose； the Libyan desert stretched before them like a huge lion…skin。
At the edge of the desert； and close to a few palm…trees； some white
huts shimmered in the morning light。
〃Are those the tabernacles of Light； father？〃 asked Thais。
〃Even so； my daughter and my sister。 Yonder is the House of Salvation；
where I will confine you with my own hands。〃
Soon they saw a number of women busy around the buildings； like bees
round their hives。 There were some who baked bread； or prepared
vegetables； many were spinning wool； and the light of heaven shone
upon them like a smile of God。 Others meditated in the shade of the
tamarisk trees； their white hands hung by their sides； for； being
filled with love； they had chosen the part of Magdalen； and performed
no work but prayer； contemplation； and ecstasy。 They were； therefore；
called the Marys； and were clad in white。 Those who worked with their
hands were called the Marthas； and wore blue robes。 All wore the hood；
but the younger ones allowed a few curls to show on their foreheads
unintentionally； it is to be presumed； since it was forbidden by the
rules。 A very old lady； tall and white； walked from cell to cell；
leaning on a staff of hard wood。 Paphnutius approached her
respectfully； kissed the hem of her veil； and said
〃The peace of the Lord be with thee； venerable Albina。 I have brought
to the hive； of which thou art queen； a bee I found lost on a
flowerless road。 I took it in the palm of my hand； and revived it with
my breath。 I give it to thee。〃
And he pointed to the actress； who knelt down before the daughter of
the Caesars。
Albina cast a piercing glance on Thais； ordered her to rise； kissed
her on the forehead； and then； turning to the monk
〃We will place her；〃 she said； 〃amongst the Marys。〃
Paphnutius then related how Thais had been brought to the House of
Salvation； and asked that she should be at once confined in a cell。
The abbess consented； and led the penitent to a hut； which had
remained empty since the death of the virgin Laeta； who had sanctified
it。 In this narrow chamber there was but a bed； a table； and a
pitcher； and Thais when she crossed the threshold； felt filled with
ineffable joy。
〃I wish to close the door myself；〃 said Paphnutius； 〃and put thereon a
seal； which Jesus will come and