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committee that he was mistaken in thinking you used improper
language to him； so you will doubtless be restored to the
dining…room to… morrow。〃
I had to add immediately； 〃Remember your place； William。〃
〃But Mr。 B knows I swore；〃 he insisted。
〃A gentleman；〃 I replied stiffly； 〃cannot remember for many hours
what a waiter has said to him。〃
〃No； sir； but〃
To stop him I had to say； 〃AndahWilliam； your wife is decidedly
better。 She has eaten the tapiocaall of it。〃
〃How can you know； sir？〃
〃By an accident。〃
〃Irene signed to the window？〃
〃No。〃
〃Then you saw her and went out and〃
〃How dare you； William？〃
〃Oh； sir； to do that for me！ May God bl〃
〃William。〃
He was reinstated in the dining…room； but often when I looked at
him I seemed to see a dying wife in his face； and so the
relations between us were still strained。 But I watched the
girl； and her pantomime was so illuminating that I knew the
sufferer had again cleaned the platter on Tuesday； had attempted
a boiled egg on Wednesday （you should have seen Irene chipping it
in Pall Mall； and putting in the salt）； but was in a woful state
of relapse on Thursday。
〃Is your mother very ill to…day； Miss Irene？〃 I asked； as soon as
I had drawn her out of range of the club…windows。
〃My！〃 she exclaimed again； and I saw an ecstatic look pass
between her and a still smaller girl with her； whom she referred
to as a neighbour。
I waited coldly。 William's wife； I was informed； had looked like
nothing but a dead one till she got the brandy。
〃Hush； child；〃 I said； shocked。 〃You don't know how the dead
look。〃
〃Bless yer！〃 she replied。
Assisted by her friend； who was evidently enormously impressed by
Irene's intimacy with me； she gave me a good deal of
miscellaneous information； as that William's real name was Mr。
Hicking； but that he was known in their street； because of the
number of his shirts； as Toff Hicking。 That the street held he
should get away from the club before two in the morning； for his
missus needed him more than the club needed him。 That William
replied （very sensibly） that if the club was short of waiters at
supper…time some of the gentlemen might be kept waiting for their
marrow… bone。 That he sat up with his missus most of the night；
and pretended to her that he got some nice long naps at the club。
That what she talked to him about mostly was the kid。 That the
kid was in another part of London （in charge of a person called
the old woman）； because there was an epidemic in Irene's street。
〃And what does the doctor say about your mother？〃
〃He sometimes says she would have a chance if she could get her
kid back。〃
〃Nonsense。〃
〃And if she was took to the country。〃
〃Then why does not William take her？〃
〃My！ And if she drank porty wine。〃
〃Doesn't she？〃
〃No。 But father； he tells her 'bout how the gentlemen drinks
it。〃
I turned from her with relief； but she came after me。
〃Ain't yer going to do it this time？〃 she demanded with a falling
face。 〃You done it last time。 I tell her you done it〃she
pointed to her friend who was looking wistfully at me〃ain't you
to let her see you doing of it？〃
For a moment I thought that her desire was another shilling； but
by a piece of pantomime she showed that she wanted me to lift my
hat to her。 So I lifted it； and when I looked behind she had her
head in the air and her neighbour was gazing at her awestruck。
These little creatures are really not without merit。
About a week afterward I was in a hired landau； holding a
newspaper before my face lest anyone should see me in company of
a waiter and his wife。 William was taking her into Surrey to
stay with an old nurse of mine； and Irene was with us； wearing
the most outrageous bonnet。
I formed a mean opinion of Mrs。 Hicking's intelligence from her
pride in the baby； which was a very ordinary one。 She created a
regrettable scene when it was brought to her； because 〃she had
been feared it would not know her again。〃 I could have told her
that they know no one for years had I not been in terror of
Irene； who dandled the child on her knees and talked to it all
the way。 I have never known a bolder little hussy than this
Irene。 She asked the infant improper questions； such as 〃Oo know
who gave me this bonnet？〃 and answered them herself。 〃It was the
pretty gentleman there；〃 and several times I had to affect sleep；
because she announced； 〃Kiddy wants to kiss the pretty
gentleman。〃
Irksome as all this necessarily was to a man of taste； I suffered
still more acutely when we reached our destination； where
disagreeable circumstances compelled me to drink tea with a
waiter's family。 William knew that I regarded thanks from
persons of his class as an outrage； yet he looked them though he
dared not speak them。 Hardly had he sat down at the table by my
orders than he remembered that I was a member of the club and
jumped up。 Nothing is in worse form than whispering； yet again
and again he whispered to his poor； foolish wife； 〃How are you
now？ You don't feel faint？〃 and when she said she felt like
another woman already； his face charged me with the change。 I
could not but conclude from the way she let the baby pound her
that she was stronger than she pretended。
I remained longer than was necessary because I had something to
say to William which I feared he would misunderstand； but when he
announced that it was time for him to catch a train back to
London； at which his wife paled； I delivered the message。
〃William；〃 I said； backing away from him； 〃the head…waiter asked
me to say that you could take a fortnight's holiday。 Your wages
will be paid as usual。〃
Confound him。
〃William；〃 I cried furiously； 〃go away。〃
Then I saw his wife signing to him； and I knew she wanted to be
left alone with me。
〃William；〃 I cried in a panic； 〃stay where you are。〃
But he was gone； and I was alone with a woman whose eyes were
filmy。 Her class are fond of scenes。 〃If you please； ma'am！〃 I
said imploringly。
But she kissed my hand； she was like a little dog。
〃It can be only the memory of some woman；〃 said she； 〃that makes
you so kind to me and mine。〃
Memory was the word she used； as if all my youth were fled。 I
suppose I really am quite elderly。
〃I should like to know her name； sir；〃 she said； 〃that I may
mention her with loving respect in my prayers。〃
I raised the woman and told her the name。 It was not Mary。 〃But
she has a home；〃 I said； 〃as you have； and I have none。 Perhaps；
ma'am； it would be better worth your while to mention me。〃
It was this woman； now in health； whom I intrusted with the
purchase of the outfits； 〃one for a boy of six months；〃 I
explained to her； 〃and one for a boy of a year；〃 for the painter
had boasted to me of David's rapid growth。 I think she was a
little surprised to find that both outfits were for the same
house； and she certainly betrayed an ignoble curiosity about the
mother's Christian name； but she was much easier to brow…beat
than a fine lady would have been； and I am sure she and her
daughter enjoyed themselves hugely in the shops； from one of
which I shall never forget Irene emerging proudly with a
commissionaire； who conducted her under an umbrella to the cab
where I was lying in wait。 I think that was the most celestial
walk of Irene's life。
I told Mrs。 Hicking to give the articles a little active ill…
treatment that they might not look quite new； at which she
exclaimed； not being in my secret； and then to forward them to
me。 I then sent them to Mary and rejoiced in my devilish cunning
all the evening； but chagrin came in the morning with a letter
from her which showed she knew all； that I was her Mr。 Anon； and
that there never had been a Timothy。 I think I was never so
gravelled。 Even now I don't know how she had contrived it。
Her cleverness raised such a demon in me that I locked away her
letter at once and have seldom read it since。 No married lady
should have indited such an epistle to a single man。 It said；
with other things which I decline to repeat； that I was her good
fairy。 As a sample of the deliberate falsehoods in it； I may
mention that she said David loved me already。 She hoped that I
would come in often to see her husband； who was very proud of my
friendship； and suggested that I should pay him my first visit
to… day at three o'clock； an hour at which； as I happened to
know； he is always away giving a painting…lesson。 In short； she
wanted first to meet me alone； so that she might draw the
delicious； respectful romance out of me； and afterward repeat it
to him； with sighs and little peeps at him over her
pocket…handkerchief。
She had dropped what were meant to look like two tears for me
upon the paper； but