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out walking with him； and stayed out till the ten o'clock beer；
Greenwich time。
There was now a truce； even as to the troubled waters of Mrs。
Saggers's pail； nothing was spoken of among the ladies but the
conduct of Mrs。 Mitts and its blighting influence on the reputation
of Titbull's。 It was agreed that Mr。 Battens 'ought to take it
up；' and Mr。 Battens was communicated with on the subject。 That
unsatisfactory individual replied 'that he didn't see his way yet；'
and it was unanimously voted by the ladies that aggravation was in
his nature。
How it came to pass； with some appearance of inconsistency； that
Mrs。 Mitts was cut by all the ladies and the Pensioner admired by
all the ladies； matters not。 Before another week was out；
Titbull's was startled by another phenomenon。 At ten o'clock in
the forenoon appeared a cab； containing not only the Greenwich
Pensioner with one arm； but； to boot； a Chelsea Pensioner with one
leg。 Both dismounting to assist Mrs。 Mitts into the cab； the
Greenwich Pensioner bore her company inside； and the Chelsea
Pensioner mounted the box by the driver： his wooden leg sticking
out after the manner of a bowsprit； as if in jocular homage to his
friend's sea…going career。 Thus the equipage drove away。 No Mrs。
Mitts returned that night。
What Mr。 Battens might have done in the matter of taking it up；
goaded by the infuriated state of public feeling next morning； was
anticipated by another phenomenon。 A Truck； propelled by the
Greenwich Pensioner and the Chelsea Pensioner； each placidly
smoking a pipe； and pushing his warrior breast against the handle。
The display on the part of the Greenwich Pensioner of his
'marriage…lines；' and his announcement that himself and friend had
looked in for the furniture of Mrs。 G。 Pensioner； late Mitts； by no
means reconciled the ladies to the conduct of their sister； on the
contrary； it is said that they appeared more than ever exasperated。
Nevertheless； my stray visits to Titbull's since the date of this
occurrence； have confirmed me in an impression that it was a
wholesome fillip。 The nine ladies are smarter； both in mind and
dress； than they used to be； though it must be admitted that they
despise the six gentlemen to the last extent。 They have a much
greater interest in the external thoroughfare too； than they had
when I first knew Titbull's。 And whenever I chance to be leaning
my back against the pump or the iron railings； and to be talking to
one of the junior ladies； and to see that a flush has passed over
her face； I immediately know without looking round that a Greenwich
Pensioner has gone past。
CHAPTER XXX … THE RUFFIAN
I entertain so strong an objection to the euphonious softening of
Ruffian into Rough； which has lately become popular； that I restore
the right word to the heading of this paper； the rather； as my
object is to dwell upon the fact that the Ruffian is tolerated
among us to an extent that goes beyond all unruffianly endurance。
I take the liberty to believe that if the Ruffian besets my life； a
professional Ruffian at large in the open streets of a great city；
notoriously having no other calling than that of Ruffian； and of
disquieting and despoiling me as I go peacefully about my lawful
business； interfering with no one； then the Government under which
I have the great constitutional privilege； supreme honour and
happiness； and all the rest of it； to exist； breaks down in the
discharge of any Government's most simple elementary duty。
What did I read in the London daily papers； in the early days of
this last September？ That the Police had 'AT LENGTH SUCCEEDED IN
CAPTURING TWO OF THE NOTORIOUS GANG THAT HAVE SO LONG INVESTED THE
WATERLOO ROAD。' Is it possible？ What a wonderful Police！ Here is
a straight； broad； public thoroughfare of immense resort； half a
mile long； gas…lighted by night； with a great gas…lighted railway
station in it； extra the street lamps； full of shops； traversed by
two popular cross thoroughfares of considerable traffic； itself the
main road to the South of London； and the admirable Police have；
after long infestment of this dark and lonely spot by a gang of
Ruffians； actually got hold of two of them。 Why； can it be doubted
that any man of fair London knowledge and common resolution； armed
with the powers of the Law； could have captured the whole
confederacy in a week？
It is to the saving up of the Ruffian class by the Magistracy and
Police … to the conventional preserving of them； as if they were
Partridges … that their number and audacity must be in great part
referred。 Why is a notorious Thief and Ruffian ever left at large？
He never turns his liberty to any account but violence and plunder；
he never did a day's work out of gaol； he never will do a day's
work out of gaol。 As a proved notorious Thief he is always
consignable to prison for three months。 When he comes out； he is
surely as notorious a Thief as he was when he went in。 Then send
him back again。 'Just Heaven！' cries the Society for the
protection of remonstrant Ruffians。 'This is equivalent to a
sentence of perpetual imprisonment！' Precisely for that reason it
has my advocacy。 I demand to have the Ruffian kept out of my way；
and out of the way of all decent people。 I demand to have the
Ruffian employed； perforce； in hewing wood and drawing water
somewhere for the general service； instead of hewing at her
Majesty's subjects and drawing their watches out of their pockets。
If this be termed an unreasonable demand； then the tax…gatherer's
demand on me must be far more unreasonable； and cannot be otherwise
than extortionate and unjust。
It will be seen that I treat of the Thief and Ruffian as one。 I do
so； because I know the two characters to be one； in the vast
majority of cases； just as well as the Police know it。 （As to the
Magistracy； with a few exceptions； they know nothing about it but
what the Police choose to tell them。） There are disorderly classes
of men who are not thieves； as railway…navigators； brickmakers；
wood…sawyers； costermongers。 These classes are often disorderly
and troublesome； but it is mostly among themselves； and at any rate
they have their industrious avocations； they work early and late；
and work hard。 The generic Ruffian … honourable member for what is
tenderly called the Rough Element … is either a Thief； or the
companion of Thieves。 When he infamously molests women coming out
of chapel on Sunday evenings （for which I would have his back
scarified often and deep） it is not only for the gratification of
his pleasant instincts； but that there may be a confusion raised by
which either he or his friends may profit； in the commission of
highway robberies or in picking pockets。 When he gets a police…
constable down and kicks him helpless for life； it is because that
constable once did his duty in bringing him to justice。 When he
rushes into the bar of a public…house and scoops an eye out of one
of the company there； or bites his ear off； it is because the man
he maims gave evidence against him。 When he and a line of comrades
extending across the footway … say of that solitary mountain…spur
of the Abruzzi； the Waterloo Road … advance towards me 'skylarking'
among themselves； my purse or shirt…pin is in predestined peril
from his playfulness。 Always a Ruffian； always a Thief。 Always a
Thief； always a Ruffian。
Now； when I； who am not paid to know these things； know them daily
on the evidence of my senses and experience； when I know that the
Ruffian never jostles a lady in the streets； or knocks a hat off；
but in order that the Thief may profit； is it surprising that I
should require from those who ARE paid to know these things；
prevention of them？
Look at this group at a street corner。 Number one is a shirking
fellow of five…and…twenty； in an ill…favoured and ill…savoured
suit； his trousers of corduroy； his coat of some indiscernible
groundwork for the deposition of grease； his neckerchief like an
eel； his complexion like dirty dough； his mangy fur cap pulled low
upon his beetle brows to hide the prison cut of his hair。 His
hands are in his pockets。 He puts them there when they are idle；
as naturally as in other people's pockets when they are busy； for
he knows that they are not roughened by work； and that they tell a
tale。 Hence； whenever he takes one out to draw a sleeve across his
nose … which is often； for he has weak eyes and a constitutional
cold in his head … he restores it to its pocket immediately
afterwards。 Number two is a burly brute of five…and…thirty； in a
tall stiff hat； is a composite as to his clothes of betting…man and
fighting…man； is whiskered； has a staring pin in his breast； along
with his right hand； has insolent and cruel eyes： large shoulders；
strong legs booted and tipped for kicking。 Number three is forty
years of age； is sh