charlotte temple-第12章

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r　my　protection。　I　have　seen　and　severely　felt　the　anguish　of　her　heart；　and　through　every　shade　which　cruelty　or　malice　may　throw　over　her；　can　discover　the　most　amiable　qualities。　　I　thought　it　but　necessary　to　mention　my　esteem　for　her　before　our　disembarkation；　as　it　is　my　fixed　resolution；　the　morning　after　we　land；　to　give　her　an　undoubted　title　to　my　favour　and　protection　by　honourably　uniting　my　fate　to　hers。　I　would　wish　every　gentleman　here　therefore　to　remember　that　her　honour　henceforth　is　mine；　and；〃　continued　he；　looking　at　Belcour；　〃should　any　man　presume　to　speak　in　the　least　disrespectfully　of　her；　I　shall　not　hesitate　to　pronounce　him　a　scoundrel。〃　Belcour　cast　at　him　a　smile　of　contempt；　and　bowing　profoundly　low；　wished　Mademoiselle　much　joy　in　the　proposed　union；　and　assuring　the　Colonel　that　he　need　not　be　in　the　least　apprehensive　of　any　one　throwing　the　least　odium　on　the　character　of　his　lady；　shook　him　by　the　hand　with　ridiculous　gravity；　and　left　the　cabin。　The　truth　was；　he　was　glad　to　be　rid　of　La　Rue；　and　so　he　was　but　freed　from　her；　he　cared　not　who　fell　a　victim　to　her　infamous　arts。　The　inexperienced　Charlotte　was　astonished　at　what　she　heard。　She　thought　La　Rue　had；　like　herself；　only　been　urged　by　the　force　of　her　attachment　to　Belcour；　to　quit　her　friends；　and　follow　him　to　the　feat　of　war：　　how　wonderful　then；　that　she　should　resolve　to　marry　another　man。　　It　was　certainly　extremely　wrong。　It　was　indelicate。　　She　mentioned　her　thoughts　to　Montraville。　He　laughed　at　her　simplicity；　called　her　a　little　ideot；　and　patting　her　on　the　cheek；　said　she　knew　nothing　of　the　world。　〃If　the　world　sanctifies　such　things；　'tis　a　very　bad　world　I　think；〃　said　Charlotte。　　〃Why　I　always　understood　they　were　to　have　been　married　when　they　arrived　at　New…York。　I　am　sure　Mademoiselle　told　me　Belcour　promised　to　marry　her。〃　〃Well；　and　suppose　he　did？〃　〃Why；　he　should　be　obliged　to　keep　his　word　I　think。〃　〃Well；　but　I　suppose　he　has　changed　his　mind；〃　said　Montraville；　〃and　then　you　know　the　case　is　altered。〃　Charlotte　looked　at　him　attentively　for　a　moment。　　A　full　sense　of　her　own　situation　rushed　upon　her　mind。　　She　burst　into　tears；　and　remained　silent。　　Montraville　too　well　understood　the　cause　of　her　tears。　　He　kissed　her　cheek；　and　bidding　her　not　make　herself　uneasy；　unable　to　bear　the　silent　but　keen　remonstrance；　hastily　left　her。　The　next　morning　by　sun…rise　they　found　themselves　at　anchor　before　the　city　of　New…York。　A　boat　was　ordered　to　convey　the　ladies　on　shore。　Crayton　accompanied　them；　and　they　were　shewn　to　a　house　of　public　entertainment。　　Scarcely　were　they　seated　when　the　door　opened；　and　the　Colonel　found　himself　in　the　arms　of　his　daughter；　who　had　landed　a　few　minutes　before　him。　　The　first　transport　of　meeting　subsided；　Crayton　introduced　his　daughter　to　Mademoiselle　La　Rue；　as　an　old　friend　of　her　mother's；　（for　the　artful　French　woman　had　really　made　it　appear　to　the　credulous　Colonel　that　she　was　in　the　same　convent　with　his　first　wife；　and；　though　much　younger；　had　received　many　tokens　of　her　esteem　and　regard。）　〃If；　Mademoiselle；〃　said　Mrs。　Beauchamp；　〃you　were　the　friend　of　my　mother；　you　must　be　worthy　the　esteem　of　all　good　hearts。　〃　〃Mademoiselle　will　soon　honour　our　family；〃　said　Crayton；　〃by　supplying　the　place　that　valuable　woman　filled：　　and　as　you　are　married；　my　dear；　I　think　you　will　not　blame〃　〃Hush；　my　dear　Sir；〃　replied　Mrs。　Beauchamp：　　〃I　know　my　duty　too　well　to　scrutinize　your　conduct。　　Be　assured；　my　dear　father；　your　happiness　is　mine。　　I　shall　rejoice　in　it；　and　sincerely　love　the　person　who　contributes　to　it。　　But　tell　me；〃　continued　she；　turning　to　Charlotte；　〃who　is　this　lovely　girl？　Is　she　your　sister；　Mademoiselle？〃　A　blush；　deep　as　the　glow　of　the　carnation；　suffused　the　cheeks　of　Charlotte。　〃It　is　a　young　lady；〃　replied　the　Colonel；　〃who　came　in　the　same　vessel　with　us　from　England。'　　He　then　drew　his　daughter　aside；　and　told　her　in　a　whisper；　Charlotte　was　the　mistress　of　Montraville。　〃What　a　pity！〃　said　Mrs。　Beauchamp　softly；　（casting　a　most　compassionate　glance　at　her。）　〃But　surely　her　mind　is　not　depraved。　The　goodness　of　her　heart　is　depicted　in　her　ingenuous　countenance。　　〃　〃Charlotte　caught　the　word　pity。　　〃And　am　I　already　fallen　so　low？〃　said　she。　　A　sigh　escaped　her；　and　a　tear　was　ready　to　start；　but　Montraville　appeared；　and　she　checked　the　rising　emotion。　Mademoiselle　went　with　the　Colonel　and　his　daughter　to　another　apartment。　　Charlotte　remained　with　Montraville　and　Belcour。　The　next　morning　the　Colonel　performed　his　promise；　and　La　Rue　became　in　due　form　Mrs。　Crayton；　exulted　in　her　own　good　fortune；　and　dared　to　look　with　an　eye　of　contempt　on　the　unfortunate　but　far　less　guilty　Charlotte。　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　END　OF　THE　FIRST　VOLUME。　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　CHARLOTTE　TEMPLE；　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　VOLUME　II　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　CHAPTER　XVIII。　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　REFLECTIONS。　〃AND　am　I　indeed　fallen　so　low；〃　said　Charlotte；　〃as　to　be　only　pitied？　Will　the　voice　of　approbation　no　more　meet　my　ear？　and　shall　I　never　again　possess　a　friend；　whose　face　will　wear　a　smile　of　joy　whenever　I　approach？　Alas！　how　thoughtless；　how　dreadfully　imprudent　have　I　been！　I　know　not　which　is　most　painful　to　endure；　the　sneer　of　contempt；　or　the　glance　of　compassion；　which　is　depicted　in　the　various　countenances　of　my　own　sex：　　they　are　both　equally　humiliating。　Ah！　my　dear　parents；　could　you　now　see　the　child　of　your　affections；　the　daughter　whom　you　so　dearly　loved；　a　poor　solitary　being；　without　society；　here　wearing　out　her　heavy　hours　in　deep　regret　and　anguish　of　heart；　no　kind　friend　of　her　own　sex　to　whom　she　can　unbosom　her　griefs；　no　beloved　mother；　no　woman　of　character　will　appear　in　my　company；　and　low　as　your　Charlotte　is　fallen；　she　cannot　associate　with　infamy。〃　These　were　the　painful　reflections　which　occupied　the　mind　of　Charlotte。　Montraville　had　placed　her　in　a　small　house　a　few　miles　from　New…York：　he　gave　her　one　female　attendant；　and　supplied　her　with　what　money　she　wanted；　but　business　and　pleasure　so　entirely　occupied　his　time；　that　he　had　little　to　devote　to　the　woman；　whom　he　had　brought　from　all　her　connections；　and　robbed　of　innocence。　Sometimes；　indeed；　he　would　steal　out　at　the　close　of　evening；　and　pass　a　few　hours　with　her；　and　then　so　much　was　she　attached　to　him；　that　all　her　sorrows　were　forgotten　while　blest　with　his　society：　she　would　enjoy　a　walk　by　moonlight；　or　sit　by　him　in　a　little　arbour　at　the　bottom　of　the　garden；　and　play　on　the　harp；　accompanying　it　with　her　plaintive；　harmonious　voice。　　But　often；　very　often；　did　he　promise　to　renew　his　visits；　and；　forgetful　of　his　promise；　leave　her　to　mourn　her　disappointment。　　What　painful　hours　of　expectation　would　she　pass！　　She　would　sit　at　a　window　which　looked　toward　a　field　he　used　to　cross；　counting　the　minutes；　and　straining　her　eyes　to　catch　the　first　glimpse　of　his　person；　till　blinded　with　tears　of　disappointment；　she　would　lean　her　head　on　her　hands；　and　give　free　vent　to　her　sorrows：　　then　catching　at　some　new　hope；　she　would　again　renew　her　watchful　position；　till　the　shades　of　evening　enveloped　every　object　in　a　dusky　cloud：　she　would　then　renew　her　complaints；　and；　with　a　heart　bursting　with　disappointed　love　and　wounded　sensibility；　retire　to　a　bed　which　remorse　had　strewed　with　thorns；　and　court　in　vain　that　comforter　of　weary　nature　（who　seldom　visits　the　unhappy）　to　come　and　steep　her　senses　in　oblivion。　Who　can　form　an　adequate　idea　of　the　sorrow　that　preyed　upon　the　mind　of　Charlotte？　　The　wife；　whose　breast　glows　with　affection　to　her　husband；　and　who　in　return　meets　only　indifference；　can　but　faintly　conceive　her　anguish。　　Dreadfully　painful　is　the　situation　of　such　a　woman；　but　she　has　many　comforts　of　which　our　poor　Charlotte　was　deprived。　The　duteous；　faithful　wife；　though　treated　with　indifference；　has　one　solid　pleasure　within　her　own　bosom；　she　can　reflect　that　she　has　not　deserved　neglectthat　she　has　ever　fulfilled　the　duties　of　her　station　with　the　strictest　exactness；　she　may　hope；　by　constant　assiduity　and　unremitted　attention；　to　recall　her　wanderer；　and　be　doubly　happy　in　his　returning　affection；　she　knows　he　cannot　leave　her　to　unite　himself　to　another：　he　cannot　cast　her　out　to　poverty　and　contempt；　she　looks　around　her；　and　sees　the　smile　of　friendly　welcome；　or　the　tear　of　affectionate　consolation；　on　the　face　of　every　person　whom　she　favours　with　her　esteem；　and　from　all　these　circumstances　she　gathers　comfort：　but　the　poor　girl　by　thoughtless　passion　led　astray；　who；　in　parting　with　her　honour；　has　forfeited　the　esteem　of　the　very　man　to　whom　she　has　sacri…iced　every　thing　dear　and　valuable　in　life；　feels　his　indifference　in　the　fruit　of　her　own　folly；　and　laments　her　want　of　power　to　recall　his　lost　affection；　she　knows　there　is　no　tie　but　honour；　and　that；　in　a　man　who　has　been　guilty　of　seduction；　is　but　very　feeble：　he　may　leave　her　in　a　moment　to　shame　and　want；　he　may　marry　and　forsake　her　for　ever；　and　should　he；　she　has　no　redress；　no　friendly；　soothing　companion　to　pour　into　her　wounded　mind　the　balm　of　consolation；　no　benevolent　hand　to　lead　her　back　to　the　path　of　rectitude；　she　has　disgraced　her　friends；　forfeited　the　good　opi