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〃I fear your wit is readier than your sword。 The soldier that
boasts how he would overwhelm some other foe than the one before
him loses credit to the degree that he protests。〃
〃You are more exacting； Miss Burton； than the lady who threw her
glove down among the lions。 What chance would Hercules himself
have of lifting those twelve heavy females out of the dumps？〃
〃It's not what we do； but what we attempt； that shows our spirit。〃
〃Then I shall expect to see you attempt great things。〃
〃I'm only a woman。〃
〃And I'm only a man。〃
〃Only a man！ what greater vantage…ground could one have than to be
a man？〃
〃The advantage is not so uncommon that one need be unduly elated；〃
state Stanton with a shrug。 〃I forget how many hundred millions
of us there are。 But I'm curious to see how you will set about
rendering the hues of this leaden day prismatic。〃
〃Only by being the innocent cause of your highly colored language；
I imagine。〃
〃Oh； dear；〃 exclaimed a little boy petulantly； as he strolled through
the hall and looked out at the steady downfall of rain。 〃Oh dear！
Why can't it stop raining？〃
〃There's the philosophy of our time for you in a nutshell；〃 said
Van Berg。 〃When a human atom wants anything； what business has
the universe to stand in its way？〃
〃But you have no better philosophy to offer the disconsolate little
fellow； Mr。 Ban Berg？〃 Miss Burton asked。
〃Now； Van； it's your turn。 Remember； Miss Burton； he has the same
vantage…ground that I have。 Indeed he's half an inch taller。〃
〃The world long ago learned better than to measure men by inches；
Mr。 Stanton。〃
〃Alas； Miss Burton；〃 said Van Berg； 〃the best philosophy I have is
this： when it rains； let it rain。〃
〃And thus I'm privileged to meet representatives of those two
ancient and honorable schools； the Stoic and Epicurean； and you both
think； I fear； that if Xanthippe had founded a school； my philosophy
would also be defined。 But perhaps you will think better of me if
I tell that little fellow a story to pass the time for him。 What's
the matter； little folk？〃 she asked； for two or three more small
clouded faces had gathered at the door。
〃Matter enough；〃 said the boy。 〃This horrid old rain keeps us in
the house； where we can't do anything or stay anywhere。 We mustn't
play in the parlor； we mustn't make a noise in the halls； we mustn't
run on the piazzas。 I'd like to live in a world where there was
some place for boys。〃
〃Poor child；〃 said Miss Burton； 〃this rain is as bad for you as
the deluge to Noah's dove； it has left you no refuge for the sole
of your foot。 Will you come with me？ No one has said you must
not hear a jolly story。〃
〃You won't tell me about any good little boys who died when they
were as big as I am？〃
〃I'll keep my wordit shall be a jolly story。〃
〃May we hear it too？〃 asked the other children。
〃Yes； all of you。〃
〃Where shall we go？〃
〃We won't disturb any one in the far corner of the parlor by the
piano。 If you know of any other little people； you can bring them
there； too；〃 and they each darted off in search of especial cronies。
〃May we not hear the story also？〃 asked Stanton。
〃No； indeed； I may be able to interest children； but not philosophers。〃
〃Then we will go and meditate；〃 said Van Berg。
〃Yes；〃 she added； 〃and in accordance with a New York custom of great
antiquity； made familiar to you； no doubt； by that grave historian
Diedrich Knickerbocker； who gives several graphic accounts of such
cloudy ruminations on the part of your city's great…grandfathers。〃
〃I fear you think that the worshipful Peter Stuyvensant's counsellors
indulged in more tobacco than thought； and that the majority of
them had as few ideas as one of Mr。 Burleigh's chimneys；〃 said Van
Berg。 〃And you regard us as the direct descendants of these men；
whose lives were crowned with smoke…wreaths only。〃
〃Now； Mr。 Van Berg； you prove yourself to be a philosopher of a
modern school； you draw your inductions so far and wide from your
diminutive premise。〃
〃Well； Miss Burton； you stand in very favorable contrast with us
poor mortals。 We are going out to add to the clouds that lower
over the world； while you are trying to banish them。〃
〃And if； after helping the children towards the close of this
dismal day； your heart should relent towards us；〃 added Stanton；
〃you will find two worthy objects of your charity。〃
〃Oh what a falling off is here！〃 she exclaimed； following the
impatient children。 〃Knights at first； then philosophers； and now
objects of charity。〃
Miss Burton evidently kept her word； and told a 〃jolly story；〃 for
the friends saw through the parlor windows that the circle around
her grew larger and more hilarious continually。 Then would follow
moments of rapt and eager attention； showing that the tale gained
in excitement and interest what it lost in humor。 Young people；
who did not like to be classed with children； one by one yielded
to the temptation。 There was life and enjoyment in that corner
and dulness elsewhere； and nothing is so attractive in the world
as genuine and joyous life。
Even elderly ladies looked wistfully up at the occasional bursts
of contagious merriment； and then sighed that they had lost the
power of laughing so easily。
At last the marvelous legend came to an end amid a round of prolonged
applause。
〃Another； another！〃 was the general outcry。
But Miss Burton had observed that the ladies and gentlemen present
seemed inclined to be friendly towards the young people's fun； and
therefore she broached another scheme of pleasure that would vary
the entertainment。
〃Perhaps；〃 she said； 〃your papas and mammas and the other good
people will not object to an old…fashioned Virginia reel。〃
A shout of welcome greeted this proposition。
Miss Burton raised her finger so impressively that there was an
instant hush。 Indeed she seemed to have gained entire control of
the large and miscellaneous group which surrounded her。
〃We will draw up a petition；〃 she said； 〃for we best enjoy our own
rights and pleasures when respecting those of others。 This little
boy and girl shall take the petition around to all the ladies and
gentlemen in the room； and this shall be the petition：
〃'Dear lady and kind sir： Please don't object to our dancing a
Virginia reel in the parlor。'〃
〃All who wish to dance can sign it。 Now we will go to the office
and draw up the petition。〃 And away they all started； the younger
children； wild with glee； capering in advance。
Stanton threw away his cigar and met her at the office register。
〃Gentle shepherdess；〃 he asked； 〃whither are you leading your
flock？〃
〃How behind the age you are！〃 she replied。 〃Can you not see that
the flock is leading me？〃
〃If I were a wolf I would not trouble the flock but would carry
off the shepherdessto a game of billiards。〃
〃What； then； would become of the flock？〃
〃that's a question that never troubles a wolf。〃
〃A wolfish answer truly。 I think； however； you have reversed the
parable； and are but a well…meaning sheep that has donned a wolf's
skin； and so we will put you to the test。 We young people will
give you a chance to draw up our petition； which； if you would
save your character； you must do at once with sheep…like docility；
asking no questions and causing no delay。 There； that will answer；
very sheepishly done； but no sheep's eyes； if you please；〃 she
added； as Stanton pretended to look up to her for inspiration；
while writing。 〃Now； all sign。 I think I can trust you； sir； on
the outskirts of the flock。 Here； my little man and woman； go to
each of the ladies and gentlemen； make a bow and a courtesy； and
present the petition。〃
〃May I not gambol with the shepherdess in the coming pastoral？〃
asked Stanton。
〃No； indeed！ You are much too old； besides； I am going to play。
You may look gravely on。〃
Every one in the parlor smiling assented to the odd little couple
that bobbed up and down before them； and moved out of the way for
the dancers。 The petitioners therefore soon returned and were
welcomed with applause。
〃Now go to the inner office and present the petition to Mr。 Burleigh；〃
said Miss Burton。
〃Hollo！〃 cried that gentleman； looking around with a great show
of savagery； as the little girl pulled the skirt of his coat to
attract his attention； 〃where's King Herod？〃
〃We wish to try another method with the children；〃 answered Miss
Burton。 〃Will it please you therefore graciously to read the
petition。 All in the parlor have assented。〃
〃My goodness gracious…〃
〃No swearing； sir； if you please。〃
〃Woman has been too many for man ever since she got him into trouble
by eating green apples；〃 ejaculated Mr。 Burleigh with a despairing
gesture。