友情提示:如果本网页打开太慢或显示不完整,请尝试鼠标右键“刷新”本网页!阅读过程发现任何错误请告诉我们,谢谢!! 报告错误
九色书籍 返回本书目录 我的书架 我的书签 TXT全本下载 进入书吧 加入书签

a face illumined-第95章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页,按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页,按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部!
————未阅读完?加入书签已便下次继续阅读!




himself to win her if he couldto be her friend till he could

become far more。  Even granting that she still looked on him merely

as a friend; that did not release him。  It was while possessing

the distinct knowledge that she cherished no warmer feeling that

he had made the pledge; and though she might not be able or willing

to…day or to…morrow; or for years to come; to give up a past love

for his sake; his promise required that he should patiently woo and

wait till she could bury the past with her old lover; and receive;

at his hands; the future that he was in honor bound to keep within

her reach。  Of course; if; after the lapse of years; she assured

him she could not and would not accept of his hand in marriage; he

would be free; but he had scarcely waited weeks before giving his

love to another。  For aught he knew; the hope of happier days; which

he had urged upon her; might be already stealing into her heart。



It gave him but little comfort now to recognize the fact that he

had never loved Jennie Burtonthat he had never known what the

word meant until swept away by the irresistible tide of a passion;

the power of which already appalled him。  To say that he did not

feel like keeping his promise now; or that his feelings had changed;

he knew would be regarded as an excuse beneath contempt; and a week

since he himself would have pronounced the most merciless judgment

against a man in his present position。



Before the vigil of that night was over; he decided that he could

not meet either Ida Mayhew or Jennie Burton again。  He believed

that Ida Mayhew understood him only too well now; and that she

thoroughly despised him。  Indeed; from her manner of passing him;

he doubted whether she willingly would speak to him again; for her

veil had prevented him from seeing the pallor and traces of grief

which she was so anxious to hide。  In his morbidly sensitive state;

it seemed a deliberate but just withdrawal of even her acquaintance。

He felt that the brief dream of Ida Mayhew was over forever; and

that she would indeed keep the priceless kingdom of her heart from

him above all others。  He believed that now; after her conversation

with Stanton; she clearly saw that the absurdly ardent friendship

he had urged upon her was only the incipient stage of a new passion

in a fickle wretch who had dared to trifle with a girl like Jennie

Burtona maiden that; of all others in the world; a man of honor

would shield。



As for Miss Burton herself; now that he realized his situation;

he felt that he could never look her in the face again。  To try to

resume his old relations seemed to be impossible。  He never had and

never could say to her a word that he knew was insincere。  Besides;

he was sure that such an effort would be futile; for she would

detect his hollowness at once; and he feared a glance of scorn from

her blue eyes more than the lightning of heaven。  He resolved to

leave the Lake House on Monday; and from New York write to Miss

Burton the unvarnished truth; assuring her that he knew himself to

be unworthy even to speak to her again。  Then; as soon as he could

complete his preparations; he would go abroad and give himself

wholly to his art。



Having come to these conclusions; he stole by a side entrance like

a guilty shadow to his room and tried to obtain such rest as is

possible to those who are in the hell of mental torment。  After an

early breakfast the following morning; he started for the mountains;

and no wild beast that ever roamed them would have torn him more

pitilessly than did his own outraged sense of honor and manhood。

He returned late in the evening; weary and faint; and with the

furtiveness of an outlaw; again reached his room without meeting

those whom he so wished to avoid。  After the heavy; unrefreshing

sleep of utter exhaustion he once more left the house early; with

his sketch…book in hand to disguise his purpose; for it was his

intention to visit the old garden before he finally left the scenes

to which he had been led by following a mere freak of fancy。  He

learned from one of Mr。 Eltinge's workman that the old gentleman

would be absent from home the entire day; and thus feeling secure

from interruption; he entered the quite; shady place in which had

begun the symphony which was now ending in such harsh discord。

Seeing that he was alone he threw himself into the rustic seat;

and burying his face in his hands; soon became unconscious of the

lapse of time in his painful revery。











Chapter LII。  An Illumined Face。









Ida's expression and manner when she came down to breakfast on

Sabbath morning; reminded Miss Burton of the time when the poor

girl believed that the man she loved; both despised and misjudged

her。  And yet there was a vital difference。  Then she was icy and

defiant; now; with all and more than the old sadness; there was

an aspect of humility and gentleness which had never been seen in

former times; but the woman who should have been so glad to cheer

her and remove all misunderstandings found that she was absolutely

unapproachable except by a sort of social violence of which Jennie

Burton was not capable。  Ida's effortwhich was but partially

successfulto be brave and even cheerful for her father's sake;

caused Mr。 Mayhew more than once to go away by himself in order

to hide his feelings。  Mrs。 Mayhew became more and more mystified

and uncomfortable。  She had enjoyed; in her cold…blooded way; a

tranquil; gossipy week during her daughter's and husband's absence;

but now she felt as if some kind of a domestic convulsion might

occur any moment。



〃I don't see why people have to make such a fuss over life;〃 she

complained。  〃If they would only do what was stylish; proper and

religious they wouldn't have any trouble;〃 and the strong and not

wholly repressed feeling of Ida and her father; of which she was

uncomfortably conscious; seemed to her absurd and uncalled for。

Like the majority of matter…of…fact people; she had no patience

or charity for emotion or deep regret。  〃Do the proper thing under

the circumstances and let that end the matter;〃 was one of her

favorite sayings。



Stanton learned from Mr。 Burleigh that Van Berg had gone on a

mountain tramp; and; when he told Ida; hope whispered to her; 〃If

he loved Jennie Burton or felt that he could return to her side;

he would not do that after his long absence。〃



But when he did not return to supper she began to droop and become

pale like a flower growing in too dense a shade。  She was glad

when the interminable day came to an end and she could shut herself

away from every one; for there are wounds which the heart would

hide even from the eyes of love and sympathy。  It had been arranged

during the day that Mr。 Mayhew should find another place at which

to spend his vacation; and that as early in the week as possible

Stanton should take his wife and daughter thither。



When at last poor Ida slept she dreamt that she was sailing on

a beautiful yacht with silver canvas and crimson flagsthat Van

Berg stood at her side pointing to a lovely island which they were

rapidly approaching。  Then a sudden gust of wind swept her overboard

and she was sinking; sinking till the waters became so cold and

dark that she awoke with a cry of terror。  〃Oh;〃 she sobbed; 〃my

dream is true!  my dream is true!〃



Mr。 Mayhew returned to the city in the morning; leaving his daughter

very reluctantly; and Ida; as early as possible; set out again in

the low phaeton to visit Mr。 Eltinge; for never before had she felt

a greater need of his counsel and help。  Tears came into her eyes

when informed of his absence。  〃Everything is against me;〃 she

murmured; but she decided to spend some time in the garden before

she returned。  She had almost reached the rustic seat when a turn

in the walk revealed that it was occupied。  Her first impulse was

to retreat hastily; but observing that Van Berg had not heard her

light step; she hesitated。  Then; his attitude of utter dejection

so won her sympathy that she could not leave him without speaking;

for she remembered how sorely in need she once had been of a

reassuring word。  Moreover; her heart said; 〃Speak to him;〃 hope

cried; 〃Stay;〃 and her temptation to win him if possible; right or

wrong; sprang up with tenfold power and whispered:  〃The man whom

Jennie Burton welcomed so cordially Saturday evening would not

wear this aspect if he had the power to return readily to her side

again。〃  Still she hesitated and found it almost as hard to obtain

words or courage now as when she saw him pulling apart the worm…eaten

rosebud。  At last she faltered:



〃Mr。 Van Berg; are you ill?〃



He started to his feet with a dazed look and passed his hand across

his browthe same gesture she so well remembered seeing him make

at the close of the happy evening he had spent at her home。  As he

realized that the maiden before him 
返回目录 上一页 下一页 回到顶部 0 0
未阅读完?加入书签已便下次继续阅读!
温馨提示: 温看小说的同时发表评论,说出自己的看法和其它小伙伴们分享也不错哦!发表书评还可以获得积分和经验奖励,认真写原创书评 被采纳为精评可以获得大量金币、积分和经验奖励哦!