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myself。 When I entered this apartment I shone 〃with all the pomp
and prodigality of brandy and water；〃 as the poet Gray has in
another place expressed it。 Powerful bard； Gray！ but a niminy…
piminy creature； afraid of a petticoat and a bottle … not a man；
sir； not a man！ Excuse me for being so troublesome； but what the
devil have I done with my fork？ Thank you； I am sure。 TEMULENTIA；
QUOAD ME IPSUM； BREVIS COLLIGO EST。 I sit and eat； sir； in a
London fog。 I should bring a link…boy to table with me； and I
would too； if the little brutes were only washed！ I intend to
found a Philanthropical Society for Washing the Deserving Poor and
Shaving Soldiers。 I am pleased to observe that； although not of an
unmilitary bearing； you are apparently shaved。 In my calendar of
the virtues shaving comes next to drinking。 A gentleman may be a
low…minded ruffian without sixpence； but he will always be close
shaved。 See me； with the eye of fancy； in the chill hours of the
morning； say about a quarter to twelve； noon … see me awake！ First
thing of all； without one thought of the plausible but
unsatisfactory small beer； or the healthful though insipid soda…
water； I take the deadly razor in my vacillating grasp； I proceed
to skate upon the margin of eternity。 Stimulating thought！ I
bleed； perhaps； but with medicable wounds。 The stubble reaped； I
pass out of my chamber； calm but triumphant。 To employ a hackneyed
phrase； I would not call Lord Wellington my uncle！ I； too； have
dared； perhaps bled； before the imminent deadly shaving…table。'
In this manner the bombastic fellow continued to entertain me all
through dinner； and by a common error of drunkards； because he had
been extremely talkative himself； leaped to the conclusion that he
had chanced on very genial company。 He told me his name； his
address； he begged we should meet again； finally he proposed that I
should dine with him in the country at an early date。
'The dinner is official；' he explained。 'The office…bearers and
Senatus of the University of Cramond … an educational institution
in which I have the honour to be Professor of Nonsense … meet to do
honour to our friend Icarus； at the old…established HOWFF； Cramond
Bridge。 One place is vacant； fascinating stranger； … I offer it to
you！'
'And who is your friend Icarus？' I asked；
'The aspiring son of Daedalus！' said he。 'Is it possible that you
have never heard the name of Byfield？'
'Possible and true；' said I。
'And is fame so small a thing？' cried he。 'Byfield； sir； is an
aeronaut。 He apes the fame of a Lunardi； and is on the point of
offering to the inhabitants … I beg your pardon； to the nobility
and gentry of our neighbourhood … the spectacle of an ascension。
As one of the gentry concerned I may be permitted to remark that I
am unmoved。 I care not a Tinker's Damn for his ascension。 No more
… I breathe it in your ear … does anybody else。 The business is
stale； sir； stale。 Lunardi did it； and overdid it。 A whimsical；
fiddling； vain fellow； by all accounts … for I was at that time
rocking in my cradle。 But once was enough。 If Lunardi went up and
came down； there was the matter settled。 We prefer to grant the
point。 We do not want to see the experiment repeated AD NAUSEAM by
Byfield； and Brown； and Butler； and Brodie； and Bottomley。 Ah！ if
they would go up and NOT come down again！ But this is by the
question。 The University of Cramond delights to honour merit in
the man； sir； rather than utility in the profession； and Byfield；
though an ignorant dog； is a sound reliable drinker； and really not
amiss over his cups。 Under the radiance of the kindly jar
partiality might even credit him with wit。'
It will be seen afterwards that this was more my business than I
thought it at the time。 Indeed； I was impatient to be gone。 Even
as my friend maundered ahead a squall burst； the jaws of the rain
were opened against the coffee…house windows； and at that inclement
signal I remembered I was due elsewhere。
CHAPTER XXVI … THE COTTAGE AT NIGHT
AT the door I was nearly blown back by the unbridled violence of
the squall； and Rowley and I must shout our parting words。 All the
way along Princes Street （whither my way led） the wind hunted me
behind and screamed in my ears。 The city was flushed with
bucketfuls of rain that tasted salt from the neighbouring ocean。
It seemed to darken and lighten again in the vicissitudes of the
gusts。 Now you would say the lamps had been blown out from end to
end of the long thoroughfare； now； in a lull； they would revive；
re…multiply； shine again on the wet pavements； and make darkness
sparingly visible。
By the time I had got to the corner of the Lothian Road there was a
distinct improvement。 For one thing； I had now my shoulder to the
wind； for a second； I came in the lee of my old prison…house； the
Castle； and； at any rate； the excessive fury of the blast was
itself moderating。 The thought of what errand I was on re…awoke
within me； and I seemed to breast the rough weather with increasing
ease。 With such a destination； what mattered a little buffeting of
wind or a sprinkle of cold water？ I recalled Flora's image； I took
her in fancy to my arms； and my heart throbbed。 And the next
moment I had recognised the inanity of that fool's paradise。 If I
could spy her taper as she went to bed； I might count myself lucky。
I had about two leagues before me of a road mostly uphill； and now
deep in mire。 So soon as I was clear of the last street lamp；
darkness received me … a darkness only pointed by the lights of
occasional rustic farms； where the dogs howled with uplifted heads
as I went by。 The wind continued to decline： it had been but a
squall； not a tempest。 The rain； on the other hand； settled into a
steady deluge； which had soon drenched me thoroughly。 I continued
to tramp forward in the night； contending with gloomy thoughts and
accompanied by the dismal ululation of the dogs。 What ailed them
that they should have been thus wakeful； and perceived the small
sound of my steps amid the general reverberation of the rain； was
more than I could fancy。 I remembered tales with which I had been
entertained in childhood。 I told myself some murderer was going
by； and the brutes perceived upon him the faint smell of blood； and
the next moment； with a physical shock； I had applied the words to
my own case！
Here was a dismal disposition for a lover。 'Was ever lady in this
humour wooed？' I asked myself； and came near turning back。 It is
never wise to risk a critical interview when your spirits are
depressed； your clothes muddy； and your hands wet！ But the
boisterous night was in itself favourable to my enterprise： now； or
perhaps never； I might find some way to have an interview with
Flora； and if I had one interview （wet clothes； low spirits and
all）； I told myself there would certainly be another。
Arrived in the cottage…garden I found the circumstances mighty
inclement。 From the round holes in the shutters of the parlour；
shafts of candle…light streamed forth； elsewhere the darkness was
complete。 The trees； the thickets； were saturated； the lower parts
of the garden turned into a morass。 At intervals； when the wind
broke forth again； there passed overhead a wild coil of clashing
branches； and between whiles the whole enclosure continuously and
stridently resounded with the rain。 I advanced close to the window
and contrived to read the face of my watch。 It was half…past
seven； they would not retire before ten； they might not before
midnight； and the prospect was unpleasant。 In a lull of the wind I
could hear from the inside the voice of Flora reading aloud； the
words of course inaudible … only a flow of undecipherable speech；
quiet； cordial； colourless； more intimate and winning； more
eloquent of her personality； but not less beautiful than song。 And
the next moment the clamour of a fresh squall broke out about the
cottage； the voice was drowned in its bellowing； and I was glad to
retreat from my dangerous post。
For three egregious hours I must now suffer the elements to do
their worst upon me； and continue to hold my ground in patience。 I
recalled the least fortunate of my services in the field： being
out…sentry of the pickets in weather no less vile； sometimes
unsuppered and with nothing to look forward to by way of breakfast
but musket…balls； and they seemed light in comparison。 So
strangely are we built： so much more strong is the love of woman
than the mere love of life。
At last my patience was rewarded。 The light disappeared from the
parlour and reappeared a moment after in the room above。 I was
pretty well informed for the enterprise that lay before me。 I knew
the lair of the dra