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portentous gravity； exclaimed in thunderous tones；
〃Sir； are you a man of science or have you the brain of a charlatan
enclosed in the fleshy envelope of a conjurer and a sinner？ Do you
study the noble and beautiful stars for their own sakes to find out
what they are； and what they are doing； what is their nature and what
their place in the great scheme； or do you peek and pry at them through
the keyhole of a contemptible curiosity in order to discover what you
think they can do for you； to set you on high； to puff you out into a
personage and cause you to be noticed of the foolish ones of this
world？ Which are you； sir； a young man of parts whose hand I can grasp
fraternally； or an insulter of planets； sir； a Peeping Tom upon the
glorious nudity of Venus； a Paul Pry squinting at the mysteries of
Mercury for an unholy and； what is more； an idiotic purpose？ What do
you ask of the stars； sir？ Tell the old astronomer that！〃
The Prophet was considerably taken aback by this tirade； which caused
the many ornaments in the pretty room to tremble。 He gazed at his
grandmother； and found her nodding approval of Sir Tiglath。 He glanced
at Lady Enid。 She was leaning back in her chair and looking amused；
like a person at an entertainment。
〃What do I ask； Sir Tiglath？〃 he murmured in some confusion。
〃Do you ask about your reverent granddam's hallowed ankles； sir？ Do you
afflict the stars with inquiries about the state of the ridiculous
weather？ Is that it？〃
The Prophet understood that Mrs。 Merillia had been frank with the
astronomer。 He cast upon her a glance of respectful reproach。
〃Yes； Hennessey；〃 she answered； 〃I have。 My dear child； I thought it
for the best。 This prophetic business would soon have been turning the
house upside down； and at my age I'm really not equal to living at
close quarters with a determined young prophet。 To do so would upset
the habits of a lifetime。 So Sir Tiglath knows all about it。〃
There was a moment of silence； which was broken by the agreeable voice
of Lady Enid saying；
〃All about what？ Remember； please； that I'm a young woman and that all
young women share one quality。 All about what； please？〃
Mrs。 Merillia looked at the Prophet。 The Prophet looked at Sir Tiglath；
who wagged his great head and cried； with rolling pathos and rebuke；
〃Oh…h…h…h！〃
〃PleaseMr。 Vivian！〃 repeated Lady Enid； with considerable
determination。
〃Grannie means that Ithatwell； that I have been enabled by the
stars to foretell certain future events；〃 said the Prophet； glancing
rather furtively at Sir Tiglath while he spoke； to note the effect of
the desperate declaration。〃
〃Oh…h…h…h！〃 bellowed the distressed astronomer； shaking like a jelly in
his wrath。
〃What？〃 cried Lady Enid； in an almost piercing voice； and with a manner
that had suddenly become most animated。 〃Whatlike Malkiel's /Almanac/
does？〃
This remark had a very striking effect upon Sir Tiglath； an effect
indeed so striking that it held Mrs。 Merillia； Lady Enid and the
Prophet in a condition of paralytic expectation for at least three
minutes by the grandmother's clock in the corner of the drawing…room。
The venerable astronomer was already very stout in person and very
inflamed in appearance。 But at this point in the discourse he suddenly
became so very much stouter and so very much more inflamed； that his
audience of three gazed upon him rather as little children gaze upon
dough which has been set by the cook to 〃rise〃 and which is fulfilling
its mission with an unexpected； and indeed intemperate； vivacity。 Their
eyes grew round； their features rigid； their hands tense； their
attitudes expectant。 Leaning forward； they stared upon Sir Tiglath with
an unwinking fixity and preternatural determination that was almost
entirely infantine。 And while they did so he continued slowly to expand
in size and to deepen in colour until mortality seemed to drop from
him。 He ceased to be a man and became a phenomenon； a purple thing that
journeyed towards some unutterable end； portentous as marching
judgment； tragic as fate； searching as epidemic； and yet heavily
painted and generally touched up by the brush of some humorous demon；
such as lays about him in preparation for Christmas pantomime； sworn to
provide the giants' faces and the ogres' heads for Drury Lane。
〃Don't！〃 at last cried a young voice。 〃Don't； Sir Tiglath！〃
A peal of laughter followed the remark； of that laughter which is loud
and yet entirely without the saving grace of merriment； a mere sudden
demonstration of hysteria。
〃Oh； Sir Tiglathdon't！〃
A second laugh joined the first and rang up with it； older； but also
hystericalMrs。 Merillia's。
〃No； noplease don't； Sir TigTig〃
A third laugh burst into the ring； seeming to complete it fatallythe
Prophet's。
〃Sir Tiglathfor Heaven's sakedon't！〃
The adjuration came from a trio of choked voices； and might have given
pause even to a descending lift or other inflexible and blind machine。
But still the astronomer grew steadily more gigantic in person and more
like the god of wine in hue。 The three voices failed； and the terrible；
united laughter was just upon the point of breaking forth again when a
diversion occurred。 The door of the drawing…room was softly opened； and
Mrs。 Fancy Quinglet appeared upon the threshold； holding in her hands
an ice…wool shawl for the comfort of her mistress。 It chanced that as
the phenomenon of the astronomer was based upon a large elbow chair
exactly facing the door she was instantly and fully confronted by it。
She did not drop the shawl； as any ordinary maid would most probably
have done。 Mrs。 Fancy was not of that kidney。 She did not even turn
tail； or give a month's warning or a scream。 She was of those women
who； when they meet the inevitable； instinctively seem to recognise
that it demands courage as a manner and truth as a greeting。 She；
therefore； stared straight at Sir Tiglathmuch as she stared at Mrs。
Merillia when she was about to arrange that lady's wig for an assembly
and remarked in a decisive； though very respectful； tone of voice；
〃The gentleman's about to burst； ma'am。 I can't speak different nor
mean other。〃
Upon finding their thoughts thus deftly gathered up and woven into a
moderately grammatical sentence； Mrs。 Merillia； Lady Enid and the
Prophet experienced a sense of extraordinary relief； and no longer felt
the stern necessity of laughing。 But this was not the miracle worked by
Mrs。 Fancy。 Had she； even then； rested satisfied with her acumen；
maintained silence and awaited the immediate fulfilment of her
prediction； what must have happened can hardly be in doubt。 But she was
seized by that excess of bravery which is called foolhardiness； and
driven by it to that peculiar and thoughtless vehemence of action which
sometimes wins V。C。's for men who； in later days； conceal amazement
under the cherished decoration。 She suddenly laid down the ice…wool
shawl upon a neighbouring sociable； walked up to the phenomenon of the
astronomer； and remarked to it with great distinctness；
〃You're about to burst； sir。 I know it； sir； and I can't know other。〃
At this point the miracle happened； for； instead of responding to the
lady's…maid's appeal； and promptly disintegrating into his respective
atoms； Sir Tiglath suddenly became comparatively small and
comparatively pale； sat forward； wagged his head at Mrs。 Fancy； and
rumbled out in his ordinary voice；
〃Have you never heard where liars go to； woman？ Oh…h…h…h！〃
On finding that nothing of supreme horror was about to happen； Mrs。
Fancy's courageas is the way of woman's courageforsook her； she
broke into tears； and had to be immediately led forth to the servant's
hall by the Prophet； exclaiming persistently with every step they
took；
〃I can't help it； Master Hennessey。 I say again as I said aforethe
gentleman's about to burst。 Them that knows other let them declare it。〃
〃Yes； yes。 It's all right； Fancy； it's all right。 We all agree with
you。 Now； now； you mustn't cry。〃
〃I can'tknowother； Master Hennessey； normean different。 I can't
indeed； Master Hennessey； I can'tknow othernor〃
〃No； no。 Of course not。 There； sit down and compose yourself。〃
He gave the poor； afflicted liar tenderly into the care of the upper
housemaid； and retraced his steps quickly to the drawing…room。 As he
entered it he heard Sir Tiglath saying；
〃The stars in their courses tremble when the accursed name of Malkiel
is mentioned； and the old astronomer is dissolved in wrath at sound of
the pernicious word。 Oh…h…h…h！〃
〃There； Hennessey！〃 cried Mrs。 Merillia； turning swiftly to her
grandson with all her cap ribands fluttering。 〃You hear what Sir
Tiglath says？〃
〃If that accursed name belonged to an individual；〃 continued the
astronomer； waving his hands frantically over the last rema