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write to Hollywell； it made her shudder to think of the misery she
might have inflicted in the former letters； where she had not spared
the detail of her worst fears and conjectures； and by no means softened
the account； as she had done to his sister。
Late in the afternoon the physician came； and she heard of his being
quieter； indeed； there were no sounds below。 It grew dark； Arnaud
brought lights； and told her Captain Morville had sunk into stupor。
After another long space； the doctor came to take some coffee； and said
the fever was lessening； but that strength was going with it； and if
〃le malade〃 was saved； it would be owing to the care and attention of
〃le chevalier〃。
Of Guy she saw no more that evening。 The last bulletin was pencilled
by him on a strip of paper； and sent to her at eleven at night：
'Pulse almost nothing； deadly faintness； doctor does not give him up；
it may be many hours： don't sit up； you shall hear when there is
anything decisive。'
Amy submitted； and slowly put herself to bed； because she thought Guy
would not like to find her up； but she had little sleep； and that was
dreamy； full of the same anxieties as her waking moments； and perhaps
making the night seem longer than if she had been awake the whole time。
At last she started from a somewhat sounder doze than usual； and saw it
was becoming light； the white summits of the mountains were beginning
to show themselves； and there was twilight in the room。 Just then she
heard a light； cautious tread in the passage； the lock of Guy's
dressing…room was gently； slowly turned。 It was over then！ Life or
death？ Her heart beat as she heard her husband's step in the next
room； and her suspense would let her call out nothing but'I am not
asleep！'
Guy came forward； and stood still； while she looked up to the outline
of his figure against the window。 With a kind of effort he said； with
forced calmness'He'll do now！ and came to the bedside。 His face was
wet with tears； and her eyes were over…flowing。 After a few moments he
murmured a few low words of deep thanksgivings； and again there was a
silence。
'He is asleep quietly and comfortably；' said Guy； presently； 'and his
pulse is steadier。 The faintness and sinking have been dreadful； the
doctor has been sitting with his hand on his pulse； telling me when to
put the cordial into his mouth。 Twice I thought him all but gone； and
till within the last hour； I did not think he could have revived； but
now； the doctor says we may almost consider the danger as over。'
'Oh； how glad I am！ Was he sensible？ Could he speak？'
'Sensible at least when not fainting； but too weak to speak； or often；
to look up。 When he did though； it was very kindly； very pleasantly。
And now！ This is joy coming in the morning； Amy！'
'I wonder if you are happier now than after the shipwreck；' said Amy；
after a silence。
'How can you ask？ The shipwreck was a gleam； the first ray that came
to cheer me in those penance hours； when I was cut off from all； and
now； oh； Amy！ I cannot enter into it。 Such richness and fullness of
blessing showered on me； more than I ever dared to wish for or dream
of； both in the present and future hopes。 It seems more than can
belong to man； at least to me； so unlike what I have deserved； that I
can hardly believe it。 It must be sent as a great trial。'
Amabel thought this so beautiful； that she could not answer； and he
presently gave her some further particulars。 He went back in spite of
her entreaties that he would afford himself a little rest； saying that
the doctor was obliged to go away； and Philip still needed the most
careful watching。 Amy could not sleep any more； but lay musing over
that ever…brightening goodness which had lately at all times almost
startled her from its very unearthliness。
CHAPTER 32
Sure all things wear a heavenly dress；
Which sanctifies their loveliness；
Types of that endless resting day；
When we shall be as changed as they。HYMN FOR SUNDAY
From that time there was little more cause for anxiety。 Philip was；
indeed； exceedingly reduced； unable to turn in bed； to lift his head；
or to speak except now and then a feeble whisper； but the fever was
entirely gone； and his excellent constitution began rapidly to repair
its ravages。 Day by day； almost hour by hour； he was rallying；
spending most of his time profitably in sleep； and looking very
contented in his short intervals of waking。 These became each day
rather longer； his voice became stronger； and he made more remarks and
inquiries。 His first care； when able to take heed of what did not
concern his immediate comfort； was that Colonel Deane should be written
to； as his leave of absence was expired； but he said not a word about
Hollywell； and Amabel therefore hoped her surmise was right； that his
confession had been prompted by a delirious fancy； though Guy thought
something was implied by his silence respecting the very persons of
whom it would have been natural to have talked。
He was very patient of his weakness and dependence； always thankful and
willing to be pleased； and all that had been unpleasant in his manner
to Guy was entirely gone。 He liked to be waited on by him； and
received his attentions without laborious gratitude； just in the way
partly affectionate； partly matter of course； that was most agreeable；
showing himself considerate of his fatigue； though without any of his
old domineering advice。
One evening Guy was writing； when Philip； who had been lying still； as
if asleep； asked； 'Are you writing to Hollywell？'
'Yes； to Charlotte； but there is no hurry； it won't go till tomorrow。
Have you any message？
'No； thank you。'
Guy fancied he sighed； and there was a long silence； at the end of
which he asked； 'Guy； have I said anything about Laura？'
'Yes；' said Guy； putting down the pen。
'I thought so； but I could not remember；' said Philip； turning round；
and settling himself for conversation； with much of his ordinary
deliberate preparation； 'I hope it was not when I had no command of
myself？'
'No； you were seldom intelligible； you were generally trying to speak
Italian； or else talking about Stylehurst。 The only time you mentioned
her was the night before the worst。'
'I recollect；' said Philip。 'I will not draw back from the resolution
I then made； though I did not know whether I had spoken it； let the
consequences be what they may。 The worst is； that they will fall the
most severely on her： and her implicit reliance on me was her only
error。'
His voice was very low； and so full of painful feeling that Guy doubted
whether to let him enter on such a subject at present； but remembering
the relief of free confession； he thought it best to allow him to
proceed； only now and then putting in some note of sympathy or of
interrogation； in word or gesture。
'I must explain；' said Philip； 'that you may see how little blame can
be imputed to her。 It was that summer； three years ago； the first
after you came。 I had always been her chief friend。 I saw； or thought
I saw； cause for putting her on her guard。 The result has shown that
the danger was imaginary； but no matterI thought it real。 In the
course of the conversation； more of my true sentiments were avowed than
I was aware of； she was very young； and before we； either of us； knew
what we were doing； it had been equivalent to a declaration。 Well！ I
do not speak to excuse the concealment； but to show you my motive。 If
it had been known； there would have been great displeasure and
disturbance； I should have been banished； and though time might have
softened matters； we should both have had a great deal to go through。
Heaven knows what it may be now！ And； Guy；' he added； breaking off
with trembling eagerness； 'when did you hear from Hollywell？ Do you
know how she has borne the news of my illness？'
'We have heard since they knew of it；' said Guy； 'the letter was from
Mrs。 Edmonstone to Amy； but she did not mention Laura。'
'She has great strength； she would endure anything rather than give
way； but how can she have borne the anxiety and silence？ You are sure
my aunt does not mention her？'
'Certain。 I will ask Amy for the letter； if you like。'
'No； do not go； I must finish； since I have begun。 We did not speak of
an engagement； it was little more than an avowal of preference； I doubt
whether she understood what it amounted to； and I desired her to be
silent。 I deceived myself all along； by declaring she was free； and I
had never asked for her promise； but those things will not do when we
see death face to face； and a resolve made at such a moment must be
kept； let it bring what it may。'
'True。'
'She will be