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very happyvery happy indeed。
FANNY ＇she leans across； puts her hand on his＇。 You're a dear； good fellow； Georgealways have been。 I wouldn't plague you only it is absolutely necessary I should knowexactly what you did tell him。
NEWTE ＇a little sulkily＇。 I told him that your uncle was a bishop。
FANNY ＇sits backstaring at him＇。 A what？
NEWTE。 A bishop。 Bishop of Waiapu； New Zealand。
FANNY。 Why New Zealand？
NEWTE。 Why not？ Had to be somewhere。 Didn't want him Archbishop of Canterbury； did you？
FANNY。 Did he believe it？
NEWTE。 Shouldn't have told him had there been any fear that he wouldn't。
FANNY。 I see。 Any other swell relations of mine knocking about？
NEWTE。 Onea judge of the Supreme Court in Ohio。 Same name； anyhow； O'Gorman。 Thought I'd make him a cousin of yours。 I've always remembered him。 Met him when I was over there in ninety… eightdamn him！
A silence。
FANNY ＇she rises＇。 Well； nothing else for it！ Got to tell him it was all a pack of lies。 Not blaming you； old boymy fault。 Didn't know he was going to ask any questions； or I'd have told him myself。 Bit of bad luck； that's all。
NEWTE。 Why must you tell him？ Only upset him。
FANNY。 It's either my telling him or leaving it for them to do。 You know me； George。 How long do you see me being bossed and bullied by my own servants？ Besides； it's bound to come out in any case。
NEWTE ＇he rises。 Kindly but firmly he puts her back into her chair。 Then pacing to and fro with his hands mostly in his trousers pockets； he talks＇。 Now； you listen to me； old girl。 I've been your business manager ever since you started in。 I've never made a mistake before… …＇he turns and faces her＇and I haven't made one this time。
FANNY。 I don't really see the smartness； George； stuffing him up with a lot of lies he can find out for himself。
NEWTE。 IF HE WANTS TO。 A couple of telegrams； one to His Grace the Bishop of Waiapu； the other to Judge Denis O'Gorman； Columbus； Ohio； would have brought him back the information that neither gentlemen had ever heard of you。 IF HE HADN'T BEEN CAREFUL NOT TO SEND THEM。 He wasn't marrying you with the idea of strengthening his family connections。 He was marrying you because he was just gone on you。 Couldn't help himself。
FANNY。 In that case； you might just as well have told him the truth。
NEWTE。 WHICH HE WOULD THEN HAVE HAD TO PASS ON TO EVERYONE ENTITLED TO ASK QUESTIONS。 Can't you understand？ Somebody； in the interest of everybody； had to tell a lie。 Well； what's a business manager for？
FANNY。 But I can't do it； George。 You don't know them。 The longer I give in to them the worse they'll get。
NEWTE。 Can't you square them？
FANNY。 No； that's the trouble。 They ARE honest。 They're the 〃faithful retainers〃 out of a melodrama。 They are working eighteen hours a day on me not for any advantage to themselves； but because they think it their 〃duty〃 to the family。 They don't seem to have any use for themselves at all。
NEWTE。 Well； what about the boy？ Can't HE talk to them？
FANNY。 Vernon！ They've brought him up from a babyspanked him all round； I expect。 Might as well ask a boy to talk to his old schoolmaster。 Besides； if he did talk； then it would all come out。 As I tell you； it's bound to come outand the sooner the better。
NEWTE。 It must NOT come out！ It's too late。 If we had told him at the beginning that he was proposing to marry into his own butler's familywell； it's an awkward situationhe might have decided to risk it。 Or he might have cried off。
FANNY。 And a good job if he had。
NEWTE。 Now talk sense。 You wanted himyou took a fancy to him from the beginning。 He's a nice boy； and there's something owing to him。 ＇It is his trump card； and he knows it。＇ Don't forget that。 He's been busy； explaining to all his friends and relations why they should receive you with open arms： really nice girl； born gentlewoman； good old Church of England familyno objection possible。 For you to spring the truth upon him NOWwell； it doesn't seem to me quite fair to HIM。
FANNY。 Then am I to live all my life dressed as a charity girl？
NEWTE。 You keep your head and things will gradually right themselves。 This family of yoursthey've got SOME sense； I suppose？
FANNY。 Never noticed any sign of it myself。
NEWTE。 Maybe you're not a judge。 ＇Laughs。＇ They'll listen to reason。 You let ME have a talk to them； one of these days； see if I can't show themfirst one and then the otherthe advantage of leaving to 〃better〃 themselvesWITH THE HELP OF A LITTLE READY MONEY。 Later onchoosing your proper timeyou can break it to him that you have discovered they're distant connections of yours； a younger branch of the family that you'd forgotten。 Give the show time to settle down into a run。 Then you can begin to make changes。
FANNY。 You've a wonderful way with you； George。 It always sounds right as you put iteven when one jolly well knows that it isn't。
NEWTE。 Well； it's always been right for you； old girl； ain't it？
FANNY。 Yes。 You've been a rattling good friend。 ＇She takes his hands。＇ Almost wish I'd married you instead。 We'd have been more suited to one another。
NEWTE ＇shakes his head＇。 Nothing like having your fancy。 You'd never have been happy without him。 ＇He releases her。＇ 'Twas a good engagement； or I'd never have sanctioned it。
FANNY。 I suppose it will be the last one you will ever get me。 ＇She has dropped for a moment into a brown study。＇
NEWTE ＇he turns＇。 I hope so。
FANNY ＇she throws off her momentary mood with a laugh＇。 Poor fellow！ You never even got your commission。
NEWTE。 I'll take ten per cent。 of all your happiness； old girl。 So make it as much as you can for my benefit。 Good…bye。 ＇He holds out hand。＇
FANNY。 You're not going？ You'll stop to lunch？
NEWTE。 Not to…day。
FANNY。 Do。 If you don't； they'll think it's because I was frightened to ask you。
NEWTE。 All the better。 The more the other party thinks he's having his way； the easier always to get your own。 Your trouble is； you know； that you never had any tact。
FANNY。 I hate tact。 ＇Newte laughs。＇ We could have had such a jolly little lunch together。 I'm all alone till the evening。 There were ever so many things I wanted to talk to you about。
NEWTE。 What？
FANNY。 Ah； how can one talk to a man with his watch in his hand？ ＇He puts it away and stands waiting； but she is cross。＇ I think you're very disagreeable。
NEWTE。 I must really get back to town。 I oughtn't to be away now； only your telegram …
FANNY。 I know。 I'm an ungrateful little beast！ ＇She crosses and rings bell。＇ You'll have a glass of champagne before you go？
NEWTE。 Well； I won't say no to that。
FANNY。 How are all the girls？
NEWTE。 Oh； chirpy。 I'm bringing them over to London。 We open at the Palace next week。
FANNY。 What did they think of my marriage？ Gerty was a bit jealous； wasn't she？
NEWTE。 Well； would have been； if she'd known who he was。 ＇Laughs。＇
FANNY。 Tell her。 Tell her ＇she draws herself up＇ I'm Lady Bantock； of Bantock Hall； Rutlandshire。 It will make her so mad。 ＇Laughs。＇
NEWTE ＇laughs＇。 I will。
FANNY。 Give them all my love。 ＇Ernest appears in answer to her bell。＇ Oh； Ernest； tell Bennet＇the eyes and mouth of Ernest open＇… …to see that Mr。 Newte has some refreshment before he leaves。 A glass of champagne andand some caviare。 Don't forget。 ＇Ernest goes out。＇ Good…bye。 You'll come again？
NEWTE。 Whenever you want meand rememberthe watchword is 〃Tact〃！
FANNY。 Yes； I've got the WORD all right。 ＇Laughs。＇ Don't forget to give my love to the girls。
NEWTE。 I won't。 So long！ ＇He goes out。＇
Fanny closes the door。 Honoria has re…entered from the dressing… room。 She looks from the handkerchief still hanging over the keyhole to Fanny。
HONORIA。 Your ladyship's handkerchief？
FANNY。 Yes。 Such a draught through that keyhole。
HONORIA ＇takes the handkerchief； hands it to Fanny＇。 I will tell the housekeeper。
FANNY。 Thanks。 Maybe you will also mention it to the butler。 Possibly also to the＇She suddenly changes。＇ Honoria。 Suppose it had been youyou know； you're awfully prettywho had married Lord Bantock； and he had brought you back here； among them alluncle； aunt； all the lot of themwhat would you have done？
HONORIA ＇she draws herself up＇。 I should have made it quite plain from the first； that I was mistress； and that they were my servants。
FANNY。 You would； you think …
HONORIA ＇checking her outburst＇。 But then； dearyou will excuse my speaking plainlythere is a slight difference between the two cases。 ＇She seats herself on the settee。 Fanny is standing near the desk。＇ You see； what we all feel about you； dear； isthat you arewell； hardly a fit wife for his lordship。 ＇Fanny's hands are itching to box the girl's ears。 To save herself； she grinds out through her teeth the word 〃Tack！〃＇ Of course； dear； it isn't altogether your fault。
FANNY。 Thanks。
HONORIA。 Your mother's marriage was most unfortunate。
FANNY ＇her efforts to suppress her feelings are justbut only just successful。＇ Need we discuss that？
HONORIA。 Well； he was an Irishman； dear； there's no de