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ted from his touch by the thin fabric of her underwear。
〃How many men have had this？〃 he asked her； the question murmured without inflection。 His head was silhouetted against the pale billows at the window； and she could not read his expression。 〃How many？〃 he said； moving the ball of his hand in a circular motion。 From any other source but this the question would have offended or even enraged her。 But she liked his curiosity。
〃A few。〃
He ran his fingers down into the space between her legs and worked his middle fingers under the fabric to touch her other hole。 〃And this？〃 he said； pushing at the place。
She was less fortable with this inquiry； verbal or digital； but he insisted。 〃Tell me；〃 he said。 〃Who's been in here？〃
〃Just one；〃 she said。
〃Godolphin？〃 he replied。
〃Yes。〃
He removed his finger and rose from the bed。 〃A family enthusiasm；〃 he remarked。
〃Where are you going？〃
〃Just closing the curtains；〃 he said。 〃The dark's better for what we're going to do。〃 He drew the drapes without closing the window。 〃Are you wearing any jewelry？〃 he asked her。
〃Just my earrings。〃
〃Take them off；〃 he said。
〃Can't we have a little light？〃
〃It's too bright as it is；〃 he replied； though she could barely see him。 He was watching her as he undressed； that much she knew。 He saw her slide her earrings from the holes in her lobes and then take off her underwear。 By the time she was pletely naked so was he。
〃I don't want a little part of you；〃 he said； approaching the bottom of the bed。 〃I want all of you； every last piece； and I want you to want all of me。〃
〃I do；〃 she said。
〃I hope you mean that。〃
〃How can I prove it？〃
His gray form seemed to darken as she spoke； receding into the shadows of the room。 He'd said he'd be invisible； and now he was。 Though she felt his hand graze her ankle； and looked down the bed to find him； he was beyond the grasp of her eye。 But pleasure flowed from his touch nevertheless。
〃I want this；〃 he said as he caressed her foot。 〃And this。〃 Now her shin and thigh。 〃And this〃…her sex…〃as much as the rest； but no more。 And this； and these。〃 Belly； breasts。 His touch was on them all； so he had to be very close to her now； but still invisible； 〃And this sweet throat； and this wonderful head；〃 Now the hands slid away again； down her arms。 〃And these〃 he said； 〃to the ends of your fingers。〃
The touch was back at her foot again； but everywhere his hands had been…which was to say her entire body…trembled with anticipation at the touch ing again。 She raised her head from the pillow a second time in the hope of glimpsing her lover。
〃Lie back；〃 he told her。
〃I want to see you。〃
〃I'm here；〃 he said； his eyes stealing a gleam from somewhere as he spoke： two bright dots in a space that； had she not known it was bounded； could have been limitless。 After his words； there was only his breath。 She couldn't help but let the rhythm of her own inhalations and exhalations fall hi with his； a lulling regularity which steadily slowed。
After a time； he raised her foot to his mouth and licked the sole from heel to toe in one motion。 Then his breath again； cooling the fluid he'd bathed her with； and slowing still further as it came and went； until her system seemed to teeter on termination at the end of each breath； only to be coaxed back into life again as she inhaled。 This was the substance of every moment； she realized： the body…never certain if the next lungful would be its last…hovering for a tiny time between cessation and continuance。 And in that space out of time； between a breath expelled and another drawn； the miraculous was easy； because neither flesh nor reason had laid their edicts there。 She felt his mouth open wide enough to enpass her toes and then； impossible as it was； slide her foot into his throat。
He's going to swallow me； she thought； and the notion conjured once again the book she'd found in Estabrook's study； with its sequence of lovers enclosed in a circle of consumption： a devouring so prodigious it had ended with mutual eclipse。 She felt no unease at the prospect。 This wasn't the business of the visible world； where fear got fat because there was so much to win and lose。 This was a place for lovers； where there was only ever gain。
She felt him draw her other leg up to his head and immerse it in the same heat； then felt him take hold of her hips and use them as purchase to impale himself upon her； inch by inch。 Perhaps he'd bee vast： his maw monstrous； his throat a tunnel； or perhaps she was pliant as silk； and he was drawing her into him like a magician threading fake flowers into a wand。 She reached up towards him in the darkness； to feel the miracle； but her fingers couldn't interpret what buzzed beneath them。 Was this her flesh or his？ Ankle or cheek？ There was no way of knowing。 Nor； in truth； any need to know。 All she wanted now was to do as the lovers in the book had done and match his devouring with her own。
She reached for the edge of the bed and turned herself half over； bringing him down beside her。 Now； though her eyes were besotted by darkness； she saw the outline of his body； folded into the shadows of her own。 There was nothing changed about his anatomy。 Though he was consuming her； his body was in no way distorted。 He lay beside her like a sleeper。 She reached out to touch him a second time； not expecting to make sense of his body now but finding she could。 This was his thigh； this his shin； this his ankle and foot。 As she ran her palm across his flesh a delicate wave of change came with it； and his substance seemed to soften beneath her touch。 The scent of his sweat was appetizing。 It； quickened the juices in her throat and belly。 She drew her head towards his feet and touched her lips to the substance of him。 Then she was feeding； spreading her hunger around him like a mouth and closing her mind on his glistening skin。 He shuddered as she took him in； and she felt the thrill of his pleasure as her own。 He had already consumed her to the hips； but she quickly matched his appetite； taking his legs down into her； swallowing both his prick and the belly it lay hard against。 She loved the excess of this； and its absurdity； their bodies defying physics and physique； or else making fresh proofs of both as the configuration closed upon itself。 Was anything ever so easy and yet so impossible； besides love？ And what was this； if not that paradox laid on a sheet？ He had slowed his swallows to allow her to catch up； and now； in tandem； they closed the loop of their consumption； until their bodies were figments； and they were mouth to mouth。
Something from outside…a shout in the street； a sour saxophone chord…threw her back into the plausible world again； and she saw the root from which their invention had flowered。 It was a monplace conjunction： her legs crossed around his hips； his erection high inside her。 She couldn't see his face； but she knew he wasn't here in this fugitive place with her。 He was still dreaming their devouring。 She panicked； wanted to regain the vision but not knowing how。 She tightened her grip on his body and； in so doing； inspired his hips to motion。 He began to move in her； breathing oh so slowly against her face。 She forgot her panic and let her rhythm once again slow until it matched his。 The solid world dissolved as she did so； and she returned to the place from which she'd been called to find that the loop was tightening by the moment； his mind enveloping her head as she enveloped his； like layers of an impossible onion； each one smaller than the layer it concealed： an enigma that could only exist where substance collapsed into the very mind which begged its being。
This bliss could not be sustained indefinitely； however。 Before long it began once more to lose its purity； tainted by further sounds from the outside world； and this time she sensed that he was also relinquishing his hold on the delirium。 Perhaps； as they learned to be lovers again； they'd find a way to sustain the state for longer： spend nights and days； perhaps； lost in the precious space between a breath expelled and another drawn。 But for now she would have to be content with the ecstasy they'd had。 Reluctantly； she let the tropic night in which they'd devoured each other be subsumed into a simpler darkness； and；'without quite knowing where consciousness began and ended； she fell asleep。
When she awoke she was alone in the bed。 That disappointment apart； she felt both lively and light。 What they'd shared was a modity more marketable than a cure for the mon cold： a high without a hangover。 She sat up； reaching for a sheet to drape around her； but before she could stand she heard his voice in the predawn gloom。 He was standing by the window； with a fold of curtain clipped between middle and forefinger； his eye to the chink he'd opened。
〃It's time for me to get working；〃 he said softly。
〃It's still early；〃 she said。
〃The sun's almost up；〃 he replied。 〃I can't waste time。〃
He let the curtain drop and crossed to the bed。 She sat up and put her arms around his torso。 She wanted to spend time with him； luxuriating in the calm she felt； but his instinct was healthier。 They both had work to do。
〃I'd rather stay here than return to the