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Dusk； a saffron sky streaked with the last reflections from the sun which had dipped behind the distant jagged mountain peaks。 On the left was a village； its church spire rigid and defiant in this white wilderness。 But the party was veering off； taking a narrow lane bordered by high snow…capped hedgerows。 Barely more than a crawling pace now； the journey having sapped their weakened bodies。
It was almost dark when they saw the ruined castle； skeletal remains of an isolated bastion which had once withstood the onslaught of Welsh raiders across the border； an impression of top…heaviness as it perched on a hillock； still on guard in spite of its crumbling stonework。
One of the party had slumped to the ground； the others clustering round him。 They made no attempt to pick him up。 The sick must be left to die。 They staggered on； came to the foot of the knoll； the small castle sinister and forbidding in the failing light。 Sylvia shuddered； she could almost feel the aura of death that had surrounded this place for centuries。 In the distance somebody was wailing； grief…stricken cries that hung in the still frosty air。 It was probably the woman who cradled her dead offspring； unable to continue any further。 Eventually the noise died away。
The ruins were already occupied； another group of a dozen or more tribesmen engaged in building a fire with dead wood which they had dug out of the drifts。 There was neither animosity nor friendship shown towards the newers； just an acceptance of their presence。
With some difficulty they managed to ignite the woodpile； the yellow flames having to fight for a hold on the wet kindling； hissing angrily； determined to conquer； giving off a strange eerie glow。
Sylvia found herself scrutinising the faces of the strangers； peering at each in turn； hope； despair； still hoping。
Eric was dead； he would not be here。 She tried to remember what he looked like but her memory failed her。
Her reasoning was being dulled； even she realised it； knew vaguely what was happening to her。 Very soon I shall be one of you。 She felt at her face； her cheeks were rough and coarse and that line of fluffy hair along her upper lip； which she had creamed for years； had grown strong and prickly。 Her armpits were bushes of coarse hair； her breasts full as though they were in milk。
She did not feel the cold as she had done earlier； huddling now with the others in the damp pit which had once been a prison from which captured enemy soldiers rarely emerged alive。 No longer an outcast； she mingled with the others； sought the warmth of their bodies。 They were her people； always had been。
A long cold night； the condensation on the stone walls a sheet of ice。 Sleeping； dreams which were beyond her prehension now； of strange places where the elements did not penetrate； where there was food in abundance。 Fearful of this unfamiliar environment； shying away from it。 Running to the hills in search of her own kind。
In search of a man who had once been her mate。
And with the ing of daylight she no longer questioned her presence here； helped the others to search for firewood amongst the frozen snowdrifts。 The clouds were building up again and they all knew that it was going to snow once more； that further travel was inadvisable。 They had a supply of dried meat but they needed to keep the fire going。 They would have to hole up here until the weather changed。
When Sylvia went back inside she noticed that two of the men had not risen from their sleeping positions of the previous night。 She knew they were dead； the others realised it； too。 Everybody accepted it； later the corpses would be dragged outside and that would be the end of it。 Where there was life there was always death。
By mid…morning it had begun to snow and the wind had risen； driving it against the north…west face of the castle； buffeting the ancient walls mercilessly as though it sought to break through to those sheltering inside。 A ceaseless onslaught。
Sylvia helped the women prepare the food； noticed how two more of them coughed and spat blood。 Her head ached； she felt unnaturally hot； her forehead damp when she wiped it with the back of her hand。 A soreness in her lungs； but there was no blood when she coughed。
And each night she dreamed of one who had once been her mate。 She saw his face； heard him calling her。 She knew she had to go to him； that she must leave this place。
On the fourth day she left the castle； took her opportunity when she and two of the other women had gone out to search for firewood。 The snow was deep； travelling was not easy； and every movement required a determined effort。 If her lover had not been constantly calling her she would not have gone。 She would have stayed and died in that underground place； somebody died every day。
She had to rest every hundred yards or so and now when she coughed there was a tinge of red on the snow。 A desperation that overcame her waning strength； an inexplicable instinct urging her to retrace her steps of the last few days。 She must return to the hills； she should never have left them。
And all the time she heard her mate calling her； a call which could not be denied。 Floundering； falling； dragging herself through deep snowdrifts。 Crawling when she could no longer walk； sobbing her frustration。
Until finally she could go no further； lying there in the frozen snow and listening to the voice of her lover vibrating in her pain…crazed brain。 Waiting for nightfall； for surely then he would e to her； carry her back to the hills which would be their rightful Kingdom now that everybody else had left。
But he did not e。 And eventually he stopped calling her。
CHAPTER TWENTY…FOUR
JACKIE DID not go upstairs to check on Rod Savage。 She knew he was dead and there was nothing to be gained by going to look at him。 Secretly she was aware of her fear of death。 It had not always been like that； she had seen plenty of it these last few months and had accepted it。 But now it was different； she did not know why。
The snowstorm petered out later the next day； but the drifts were piled high up against the walls of the small cottage。 Travelling was out of the question； she had no choice other than to remain where she was。
Yet her instinct to leave was strong。 Very strong。 Like the wild geese experiencing the urge to fly south with the onset of winter； so she became restless。 Pacing the living…room hour after hour； staring out of the windows at the drifted snow； contemplating digging herself out of the garden。 But it would not end there； miles of deep snow lay between herself and the freedom she craved。 In the end she resigned herself to staying； remaining in the cottage； a corpse on the bed upstairs for pany。
Two nights later the dreams began； weird frightening dreams as though a hitherto closed door of her subconscious had opened up； a puter that had been given an extra key and processed data which had previously been denied it。
Delany's again； her surroundings so familiar that it might have been only yesterday that she had staggered in there。 You're not well； you need to rest。 'It's the Russians that have done this to us。' She ignored the man loitering in the craft centre； pushed past him and went on into the restaurant。 Empty； as she knew it would be。 The ovens still steamed； gave off an appetising aroma of vegetarian dishes。 I'm not well； there's something wrong with my skin； it's smarting and I can't think properly。 Yes； you can。 Fight it； don't succumb to it。
Seated at a table； a cup of steaming herb tea before her； inhaling the vapour； it seemed to clear her head a little。 Think； girl； think it all out carefully。 You made the wrong decision last time； this is your final chance。
The steam quelled the feeling of dizziness； her brain shuttered like an old plate camera； came back to reality。 People were shouting outside； sirens blaring； police and ambulances stuck in the traffic jam。 What the hell was going on？ A nuclear attack？
Forget them； concentrate on yourself； you've got to get back home。 Don't go to Pauline's mother's house this time because that was where you went wrong before。 Maybe now she could drive the Dyane except she would never get out of town in it。 Whatever her decision she would have to go on foot。 Head south。 Remember that； keep going south。
She drank the herb tea thirstily； poured herself some more。 Don't forget to fill your carrier bags with food before you go because you'll need it。 Then with a jolt she remembered Jon。 Jon！ She could picture his face clearly now； the misty profile which had been eluding her for so long。 Her husband。 A pang of bitterness because he had another woman； probably that Atkinson girl was with him right now。 Jealousy； then guilt。 She had had other men too but now it was time for a reconciliation。 She and Jon could both work at something they had let slip； a marriage that had slid for years and was nearly at the bottom of the slope。 But she had to get home； that was a priority。 H